Dear ...

i got one

dear @sshole i met last night when i stayed out til 1:30 being my friend's wingman:

I do NOT have anger issues. where the fuuck did that comment come from anyway; i wasn't even TALKING to you. Or maybe THAT was the problem you freak and hater of married hot girls. Lucky for you i forgot what you look like so if i see you at school i probably won't kick your asss. if i do see someone who bears a resemblance to hootie I will kill you though; be warned. thanks for pissing me off so much I ended up leaving. and you know WHAT I DO have anger issues but I don't need to hear it from your sorry asss.

signed:
married biitch who you better hide from.

Dear NYC Transit,

You S U C K making my 20 min. commute an hour!!!!!

Stop increasing the fare for even s h i t t i er service!!!


Sincerely,

A daily commuter

Dear AF,

Just COME ALREADY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Worst PMS ever this week. Not due till Sunday.

Sincerely,
Crankypuss

i got a nice one now

dear mr. cab driver from pakistan:

I love you. you really made my night. thanks for being so nice to me and listening to me vent about how tired i am from work and school. thanks for hanging on to my every (drunk) word as if it were so important. You really made me feel so good about myself, I almost cried. And thanks for telling me that my dad must be so proud of me, and what a huge accomplishment this is, and how important education is. I needed to hear it, and I'm going to call my dad today because you made me miss him even more. I loved seeing pictures of your daughters, and I know she will be a doctor someday especially with you working so hard to send money back to pakistan. I get sad thinking about it but I hope you get to be with your family again soon. and it was a pleasure chatting with you too and I hope to see you someday again also. You totally made up for the assshole at the bar who said I had anger issues. I hope my $10 tip helped.


signed the smart educated drunk girl you took to queens last night

Dear all annoying patients,
thank you for ignoring all the posted hour signs, and coming in half and hour before we open. i know you are in a hurry to go home and do nothing since you are totally 'disabled' for the past month or year.....but please do not yell at me for coming on time, it only seems like i am late because you camped outside the office like a stalker.
and for the rest of you, thank you for coming in when ever you feel like it....
we do make appointments for a reason you know, but i guess i forgot that the world is revolving around you today.

Your apparently inconsiderate therapy staff

Dear spider in my bedroom,

Can you please crawl out some rip in the screen today while I am at work? Otherwise, my FH will kill you tonight before we go to sleep. You got away from me last night, but don't think you'll be so lucky tonight. You're always in the same damn spot - if you want to live, leave or get creative with your hiding spots.



Love,
The person who's apartment you've invaded.

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Posted by JBoothIn2008

Dear spider in my bedroom,

Can you please crawl out some rip in the screen today while I am at work? Otherwise, my FH will kill you tonight before we go to sleep. You got away from me last night, but don't think you'll be so lucky tonight. You're always in the same damn spot - if you want to live, leave or get creative with your hiding spots.



Love,
The person who's apartment you've invaded.

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aww poor spidey, you know he's eating the other evil bugs in your apartment

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Posted by yswedding

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Posted by JBoothIn2008

Dear spider in my bedroom,

Can you please crawl out some rip in the screen today while I am at work? Otherwise, my FH will kill you tonight before we go to sleep. You got away from me last night, but don't think you'll be so lucky tonight. You're always in the same damn spot - if you want to live, leave or get creative with your hiding spots.



Love,
The person who's apartment you've invaded.

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aww poor spidey, you know he's eating the other evil bugs in your apartment

---

I know, I know. But I don't really care about the other bugs. I can kill them no problem. The spiders get me because they are creepy and crawly and it's hard for me to kill them - afraid they are going to get on me Honestly, I've gotten better, but if they are above my head, I ain't touching them. And then I can't sleep in the room until FH removes them.

Dear DH,
I am not your mother. I do not wipe your a$$, therefore you must learn how to do things around the apt. Pick up your dirty laundry and very easily open the hamper and shove it in. I know, its hard. Wash your dirty dishes... the list could go on and on..

PS-I will keep on trying to get you to put the damn seat down!!!

Love
Your wife who will not double as your mother

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Posted by JBoothIn2008

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Posted by yswedding

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Posted by JBoothIn2008

Dear spider in my bedroom,

Can you please crawl out some rip in the screen today while I am at work? Otherwise, my FH will kill you tonight before we go to sleep. You got away from me last night, but don't think you'll be so lucky tonight. You're always in the same damn spot - if you want to live, leave or get creative with your hiding spots.



Love,
The person who's apartment you've invaded.

---

aww poor spidey, you know he's eating the other evil bugs in your apartment

---

I know, I know. But I don't really care about the other bugs. I can kill them no problem. The spiders get me because they are creepy and crawly and it's hard for me to kill them - afraid they are going to get on me Honestly, I've gotten better, but if they are above my head, I ain't touching them. And then I can't sleep in the room until FH removes them.

---

OMG...I am the biggest baby when it comes to spiders! i hate this time of year when all the big ones with hair and stipes come out and find it neccesary to make webs right across my front door!

I have another one ....

Dear @sshole I share office space with (yes, he's still a jerk):

Why must you come in and slam doors???? Are you that big of a baby that when you're in a bad mood about something, you have to make noise??? You haven't SPOKEN A WORD TO ME since July, since my boss told you to cut the f'n crap and do your job without being a snot-nosed jerk, so I know it can't be ME that's pissed you off. And that crap you pulled this week with making ME download a song for a job YOU are editing, something YOU should do as part of your job, and then saying, I can't use this song, it wasn't downloaded right, blah blah blah ... why must you try to make things so difficult??? When are you going to GROW THE F UP???????? I do not know how your girlfriend-of-ten-years-who-you-refuse-to-marry-because-you-don't-want-kids-and-there-is-no-reason tolerates you at all.

Signed (no f'n love here),
YOUR CLIENT.

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Posted by JBoothIn2008

I have another one ....

Dear @sshole I share office space with (yes, he's still a jerk):

Why must you come in and slam doors???? Are you that big of a baby that when you're in a bad mood about something, you have to make noise??? You haven't SPOKEN A WORD TO ME since July, since my boss told you to cut the f'n crap and do your job without being a snot-nosed jerk, so I know it can't be ME that's pissed you off. And that crap you pulled this week with making ME download a song for a job YOU are editing, something YOU should do as part of your job, and then saying, I can't use this song, it wasn't downloaded right, blah blah blah ... why must you try to make things so difficult??? When are you going to GROW THE F UP???????? I do not know how your girlfriend-of-ten-years-who-you-refuse-to-marry-because-you-don't-want-kids-and-there-is-no-reason tolerates you at all.

Signed (no f'n love here),
YOUR CLIENT.

---

OMG ... does it ever end for you with this jerk ugh, I feel your pain!!!

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Posted by KarinAmanda

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Posted by JBoothIn2008

I have another one ....

Dear @sshole I share office space with (yes, he's still a jerk):

Why must you come in and slam doors???? Are you that big of a baby that when you're in a bad mood about something, you have to make noise??? You haven't SPOKEN A WORD TO ME since July, since my boss told you to cut the f'n crap and do your job without being a snot-nosed jerk, so I know it can't be ME that's pissed you off. And that crap you pulled this week with making ME download a song for a job YOU are editing, something YOU should do as part of your job, and then saying, I can't use this song, it wasn't downloaded right, blah blah blah ... why must you try to make things so difficult??? When are you going to GROW THE F UP???????? I do not know how your girlfriend-of-ten-years-who-you-refuse-to-marry-because-you-don't-want-kids-and-there-is-no-reason tolerates you at all.

Signed (no f'n love here),
YOUR CLIENT.

---

OMG ... does it ever end for you with this jerk ugh, I feel your pain!!!

---

You know, I stopped trying to be friendly a long time ago. I am polite, but I do not smile at him, I do not say hello or goodbye when I come and go (I used to tell him when I was leaving for lunch if it was just us here, stopped that months ago). It doesn't really bother me anymore, he's just a baby who can't act like a grown man and I've accepted it. It DOES bother me when he is rude though and slams doors and stomps around for no friggin reason. Get an f'n life, all right?

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Posted by JBoothIn2008

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Posted by KarinAmanda

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Posted by JBoothIn2008

I have another one ....

Dear @sshole I share office space with (yes, he's still a jerk):

Why must you come in and slam doors???? Are you that big of a baby that when you're in a bad mood about something, you have to make noise??? You haven't SPOKEN A WORD TO ME since July, since my boss told you to cut the f'n crap and do your job without being a snot-nosed jerk, so I know it can't be ME that's pissed you off. And that crap you pulled this week with making ME download a song for a job YOU are editing, something YOU should do as part of your job, and then saying, I can't use this song, it wasn't downloaded right, blah blah blah ... why must you try to make things so difficult??? When are you going to GROW THE F UP???????? I do not know how your girlfriend-of-ten-years-who-you-refuse-to-marry-because-you-don't-want-kids-and-there-is-no-reason tolerates you at all.

Signed (no f'n love here),
YOUR CLIENT.

---

OMG ... does it ever end for you with this jerk ugh, I feel your pain!!!

---

You know, I stopped trying to be friendly a long time ago. I am polite, but I do not smile at him, I do not say hello or goodbye when I come and go (I used to tell him when I was leaving for lunch if it was just us here, stopped that months ago). It doesn't really bother me anymore, he's just a baby who can't act like a grown man and I've accepted it. It DOES bother me when he is rude though and slams doors and stomps around for no friggin reason. Get an f'n life, all right?

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f'em! Dont waste your time or energy oh, and pop him a bag of popcorn and tell him to save the drama for his mam

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Posted by JBoothIn2008

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Posted by KarinAmanda

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Posted by JBoothIn2008

I have another one ....

Dear @sshole I share office space with (yes, he's still a jerk):

Why must you come in and slam doors???? Are you that big of a baby that when you're in a bad mood about something, you have to make noise??? You haven't SPOKEN A WORD TO ME since July, since my boss told you to cut the f'n crap and do your job without being a snot-nosed jerk, so I know it can't be ME that's pissed you off. And that crap you pulled this week with making ME download a song for a job YOU are editing, something YOU should do as part of your job, and then saying, I can't use this song, it wasn't downloaded right, blah blah blah ... why must you try to make things so difficult??? When are you going to GROW THE F UP???????? I do not know how your girlfriend-of-ten-years-who-you-refuse-to-marry-because-you-don't-want-kids-and-there-is-no-reason tolerates you at all.

Signed (no f'n love here),
YOUR CLIENT.

---

OMG ... does it ever end for you with this jerk ugh, I feel your pain!!!

---

You know, I stopped trying to be friendly a long time ago. I am polite, but I do not smile at him, I do not say hello or goodbye when I come and go (I used to tell him when I was leaving for lunch if it was just us here, stopped that months ago). It doesn't really bother me anymore, he's just a baby who can't act like a grown man and I've accepted it. It DOES bother me when he is rude though and slams doors and stomps around for no friggin reason. Get an f'n life, all right?

---

sorry you have to deal with that.....i would have killed him already.....want me to come kick some a$$??????

Dear FH-

I have been asking you to pick a song to dance with your mom to for WEEEKS! If you dont find something today- you will get a choice of one of the following:

-The theme from Sponge Bob
or
-I like to dance like a fairy

Thanks,
your soon-to-be loving wife

Dear Fellow Subway Rider,
Please re-read your 'subway etiquette 101' manuals before your next trip. Please note that is generally considered RUDE and SELF CENTERED to wrap your arms around the pole in the center while other riders are trying to hold on to it so they don't go flying around. You're a 'germ-a-phobe' and don't like using your hands to hold the pole you say.......NOT MY PROBLEM!!!! get out your purell, wear gloves, or you go flying around the car...i don't give a $*%&. and no, the fact that your trying to read the paper and your prayer book at the same time will garner no sympathy from me. if you want to have your hands free for your morning commute so that you can multi task - sit on the floor!

Kindly,
Ms. Fed up with guy on the Q train every morning!

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Posted by agraydc

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Posted by JBoothIn2008

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Posted by KarinAmanda

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Posted by JBoothIn2008

I have another one ....

Dear @sshole I share office space with (yes, he's still a jerk):

Why must you come in and slam doors???? Are you that big of a baby that when you're in a bad mood about something, you have to make noise??? You haven't SPOKEN A WORD TO ME since July, since my boss told you to cut the f'n crap and do your job without being a snot-nosed jerk, so I know it can't be ME that's pissed you off. And that crap you pulled this week with making ME download a song for a job YOU are editing, something YOU should do as part of your job, and then saying, I can't use this song, it wasn't downloaded right, blah blah blah ... why must you try to make things so difficult??? When are you going to GROW THE F UP???????? I do not know how your girlfriend-of-ten-years-who-you-refuse-to-marry-because-you-don't-want-kids-and-there-is-no-reason tolerates you at all.

Signed (no f'n love here),
YOUR CLIENT.

---

OMG ... does it ever end for you with this jerk ugh, I feel your pain!!!

---

You know, I stopped trying to be friendly a long time ago. I am polite, but I do not smile at him, I do not say hello or goodbye when I come and go (I used to tell him when I was leaving for lunch if it was just us here, stopped that months ago). It doesn't really bother me anymore, he's just a baby who can't act like a grown man and I've accepted it. It DOES bother me when he is rude though and slams doors and stomps around for no friggin reason. Get an f'n life, all right?

---

sorry you have to deal with that.....i would have killed him already.....want me to come kick some a$$??????

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hahahah thanks! My boss is ready to do it, honestly. they have been friends for a while though and we actually rent our space from him (it's one office with smaller little areas we rent) so we can't really ditch him ... ugh ....

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Posted by KarinAmanda

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Posted by JBoothIn2008

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Posted by KarinAmanda

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Posted by JBoothIn2008

I have another one ....

Dear @sshole I share office space with (yes, he's still a jerk):

Why must you come in and slam doors???? Are you that big of a baby that when you're in a bad mood about something, you have to make noise??? You haven't SPOKEN A WORD TO ME since July, since my boss told you to cut the f'n crap and do your job without being a snot-nosed jerk, so I know it can't be ME that's pissed you off. And that crap you pulled this week with making ME download a song for a job YOU are editing, something YOU should do as part of your job, and then saying, I can't use this song, it wasn't downloaded right, blah blah blah ... why must you try to make things so difficult??? When are you going to GROW THE F UP???????? I do not know how your girlfriend-of-ten-years-who-you-refuse-to-marry-because-you-don't-want-kids-and-there-is-no-reason tolerates you at all.

Signed (no f'n love here),
YOUR CLIENT.

---

OMG ... does it ever end for you with this jerk ugh, I feel your pain!!!

---

You know, I stopped trying to be friendly a long time ago. I am polite, but I do not smile at him, I do not say hello or goodbye when I come and go (I used to tell him when I was leaving for lunch if it was just us here, stopped that months ago). It doesn't really bother me anymore, he's just a baby who can't act like a grown man and I've accepted it. It DOES bother me when he is rude though and slams doors and stomps around for no friggin reason. Get an f'n life, all right?

---

f'em! Dont waste your time or energy oh, and pop him a bag of popcorn and tell him to save the drama for his mam

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thanks hon!