Dear ____

Dear People at work who have the night off,

i really dont like any of you tonight. the majority of you arent college students like myself. you are making a career out of a part time job in a pizza shop.

I, however, have a huge test tomorrow that I must pass in order to graduate, but can any of you cover my 5 hour shift tonight??

no you cant because buying a new car, your moms birthday, and your anniversary are wayy more important.

i didnt realize how stressed you were working 20 hours a week and doing nothing..and i mean nothing else with your life.

Sincerely,

your part-time co-worker who goes to school full time, does home work, studies, and is planning a wedding.

Dear today,
You stink. Please end now
Sincerely,
Your tired inhabitant of earth

Dear Gums,

Please grow back....

Dear this week,

PLEASE STOP BEING HORRIBLE.

Dear fat,

Can you just magically fall off my stomach and thighs? I would love to eat alot of brownies and cookies, drink beer, and take a few days off from excercises.

Love,
Fatty McFatterson

Dear Wednesday you completely suuck! i hate the fact that i had to wait in school for 3 hours to meet my professors
and co worker why you must talk behind my back to the counselors so they hate me?? please end now!

Dear People who can't drive

I don't have all day for you to drive 20 mph on hempstead turnpike

when i am on your a$$ or beep MOVE if you have all day get the fck out of my way cuz i don't

one day you people are going to put me over the edge that i am going to slam on the gas and run my car into you - i don't care

dear my friend who got engaged last week,

i know you want to get married this september, and you bought your invitations already, but you will drive yourself crazy if you rush everything!!


your concerned friend,
erika

Dear Career,

Please stop stressing me out. I think I finally understand what I need to be doing, but having anxiety attacks and waking up in the middle of the night worrying about it I handled X, Y, and Z correctly is NOT fun... I'd much rather be focusing on Summer plans, and my WEDDING.

Thanks,

Me

Dear Master Bathroom -

Is there anyway you can magically put yourself back together and stop giving FH so much stress?

Sincerely,
FW who cannot afford anymore trips to Home Depot