Dear ___________,

Dear Psycho Co-Worker,

You ask everyone why I no longer talk to you. Perhaps it's because when we pass each other in the hall, I would say 'hi' and you'd look at me like I was dirt. Perhaps it's because when you'd whine about not knowing any cool spots in the city, I used to invite you out to see my friend's band and you wouldn't show up, even after I comped you on the guest list. Or perhaps it's because you made some jackass comment about interracial relationships in front of me, all the while knowing that FH and I are of different ethnicities.

Yeah, that's the one.

Now you want to know how the wedding planning is going?! You won't say hello to me in the common areas at work, yet you want to know how the plans are working out? I hope you don't think you're invited because you're in for a big surprise, you effing freak show!

Signed,
We have good health insurance here, so go get your head checked.

Dear Mee-uhhh

i love you. your tips about my hair were on point. i bought wat u told me to buy and my hair is soooooo freakin hottt today at work!..


your new BFF

barbara

Dear Salt & vinegar chips,

Go eat yourself, so I won't eat you!!

Love,
Your fat feathered friend

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Posted by AdriandSteve

(i love dear co-worker letters!!!)

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Coworkers are like the annoying family members that you'd rather not have in your life...you don't get to pick 'em, and you're pretty much stuck with 'em.

But at least you can resign and go far, far away from them...

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Posted by Mrs Z To Be

Dear Salt & vinegar chips,

Go eat yourself, so I won't eat you!!

Love,
Your fat feathered friend

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Dear Lisa,

Share your chips with the rest of us

Lovingly,
the lover of all things snack like

Dear Co worker.....

now that i am in charge of the program i should fire you for talking crap about me but i am not the type of person so i am going to be nice about it and wait until you get to work to have a nice little chat with you yes you have been here for like 10 years but you don't have the curriculum qualifications that I have due to the fact you didn't go to college! i know your circumstances were different than mine but that doesn't mean you can talk junk about me!! can't wait for you to get to work so me and you can have a chat

love

your annoyed boss!!

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Posted by grrulz

Dear Co worker.....

now that i am in charge of the program i should fire you for talking crap about me but i am not the type of person so i am going to be nice about it and wait until you get to work to have a nice little chat with you yes you have been here for like 10 years but you don't have the curriculum qualifications that I have due to the fact you didn't go to college! i know your circumstances were different than mine but that doesn't mean you can talk junk about me!! can't wait for you to get to work so me and you can have a chat

love

your annoyed boss!!

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omg i wish i was my co-workers boss. I'd LOVE THAT!!!!!!

Enjoy!! lol

Dear Attack Mockingbird,

i know you have been lurking the last few weeks to find the perfect tree for you and your babies....i heard there screaching chirps this morning and i saw you doing the swwoop....i really do not want to spend the ENTIRE spring and most of the summer in fear of going in and out of my house...I ran to my car this morning like i was getting chased by an attacker...it is really not necessary! i still feel your gross feathers on my neck from when you attacked me last year! I really am in no mood! i dont want to hurt your little chicks but i might just shoot you this year if you dont stop!!!

So stop swooping and attacking us!!!

Love,
no longer wanting to live in fear and will shoot you! you are living in my tree by the way


girls...i wish i could say i was making that up but im not


Dear Mom,
I am not a tradionalist as you were/are..I do not need to do everything like you and your brothers and sister did! we are not in the 80's and i do not need to do everything little thing like you did...I am going togett married in a church like you would like...im also not getting my destination wedding like i would like bec you didnt think it was a good idea...so please stop with the guilt and the faces!

love you! but please stop!

Thanks!

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Posted by dreamerchic33

Dear Attack Mockingbird,

i know you have been lurking the last few weeks to find the perfect tree for you and your babies....i heard there screaching chirps this morning and i saw you doing the swwoop....i really do not want to spend the ENTIRE spring and most of the summer in fear of going in and out of my house...I ran to my car this morning like i was getting chased by an attacker...it is really not necessary! i still feel your gross feathers on my neck from when you attacked me last year! I really am in no mood! i dont want to hurt your little chicks but i might just shoot you this year if you dont stop!!!

So stop swooping and attacking us!!!

Love,
no longer wanting to live in fear and will shoot you! you are living in my tree by the way


girls...i wish i could say i was making that up but im not :-

Thanks!

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animals are strange. I feel for you.

2 summers in a row i had the same bird fly into the bay window on the front of my house. This happened daily for 2 years so it wasn't an accident since it happened all the time.

Then i had my crazy squirrel. He would sit on the tree and stare into our house for hours!!! Then at times he would follow my mom and I up to the front door, about 5 feet behind us, and just sit on the front step like he wanted to come in. And EVERY morning i would see him sitting on the front lawn starring at me while i was getting into my car.

weird man weird.

Over-delegating boss-

I am not your personal assitant. I am not the person to complete your To Do list. If you volunteer for an assignment please do it. Do not volunteer me. Esp when I told you (quite loudly, I'll admit) that I have no time whatsoever until this new fund closes on Wednesday.

And when I do your 3 extra tasks even though I should not have you could be a little appreciative.


You're going to be receiving my doc bill from the ulcer all this stress is causing me.

dear patken

why havent you responded to my email yet.
fh and are wanting to see our epics so bad

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Posted by Mrs Z To Be

Dear Salt & vinegar chips,

Go eat yourself, so I won't eat you!!

Love,
Your fat feathered friend

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omg i loooove salt n vinegar chips

Dear Boss-
i know that you dont want your kids to eat candy, but please dont bring in all your extra Easter candy to work and put it on the empty desk in front of me. Why buy it if you dont want your kids to eat it!

Sincerely-
Your getting fatter secretary


Dear Jelly Beans-

Stop staring at me like that. I know you want me to eat you but I am going to resist

My butt

Dear Research Proposal,

Please write yourself.

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Posted by Future Mrs H

Dear Boss-
i know that you dont want your kids to eat candy, but please dont bring in all your extra Easter candy to work and put it on the empty desk in front of me. Why buy it if you dont want your kids to eat it!

Sincerely-
Your getting fatter secretary


Dear Jelly Beans-

Stop staring at me like that. I know you want me to eat you but I am going to resist

My butt

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Your butt is quite the typer.

Dear FH,

as much as i love you and cant wait to be your wife...im seriously going to HURT you if you dont knock it off.... stop making me do this:
love,
your soon to be, going a little crazy bec of you wife

dear jessica mcclintock,

i love your dresses more than life itself. can you please make them cheaper?

love,
bargain shopper

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Posted by SummerBride10

dear jessica mcclintock,

i love your dresses more than life itself. can you please make them cheaper?

love,
bargain shopper

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Ditto! But with Jim Hjelm!

Dear Weekend,

Thanks for being here tomorrow! And being 80 degrees.

Dear Chateau Briand,

Please be pretty on Sunday so I can take pics of your outside.

Yay for a co-workers wedding!