I don't have much advice to offer other than to do what YOU want, and clearly it does not sound like you want her to be your MOH.
I like the idea of having your mom as your MOH.
luvabul
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Re: My sister will ruin my wedding... help
if you dont even get along with her, and shes all of the above, and ur FH doesnt agree, and ur parents are scared, is it possible that you not invite her at ALL? .... considering how ur fathers wedding went, ur wedding could be a complete disaster too...either dont invite her or yes pleaseee INVEST some $$$ in a bouncer... to watch her. you wouldnt want her to make an embarassing scene at ur wedding
im sorry u have to go through all this, i hope things work out, u have a very sticky situation on ur hands but DO NOT make her MOH. if u have a best friend or some one else thats close to u, the spot should be given to them, is she even going to help out with bridal shower? BM dresses ? etc... if not, than thats pointless....
feel better!
HelenZ
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Re: My sister will ruin my wedding... help
wow that's really tough, that's a 'damned if you do, damned if you don't' situation. It sounds like she wants attention so maybe if she is a BM she'll tone down her drama, but she sounds like you just can't be sure with her outbursts!
Maybe make your mom your matron of honor? and you could have your sis as MOH or just a BM....at least that way your being the better person and she shouldn't see any reason to lash out on you.
I'm sorry your in this situation, she sounds pretty selfish to me. I hope she realizes that you are her only sister and learns to treat you better than she has- she should get off the drugs & just be happy for you!!
mrsh2b
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Re: My sister will ruin my wedding... help
Wow! That's rough. Do whatever you want to do. It's up to you. don't feel obligated to have her as a MOH. As for the bad behavior, I'm in a similar situation with FH's cousin. I'm considering hiring security to handle any issues with her. I also provided pics to my RH of her so that the bartenders and my BM can keep an eye on her. Good luck with that!
NancyN
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Re: My sister will ruin my wedding... help
Can you have 2 MOH? That way if she messes something up you have another one? Matron and maid of honor?
Sorry you have to deal with all of this.
Maybe if she involved and you give her some things to help with (nothing too important) she will feel more involved?. let her know how important the day is to you - and that you really want her to be a part of it. jsut a thoght - kill her with kindness and see if that works.
If you invite her kids - maybe that will keep her busy durnig the ceremony.
or you can jsut not invite any of them...
HelenZ
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Re: My sister will ruin my wedding... help
I forgot to say Congrats!! on being pregnant! My sister got married when she was 5 months pregnant (we planned everything in 3 months!! yikes!).
That's really terrible that your sis can't be more considerate of the fact that your pregnant, you don't need all this drama!!! Good luck!!
Mooshyboo
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Re: My sister will ruin my wedding... help
hmmmm this is a toughy ~ if your gutt instict is telling you not to have your sister as your MOH then I would go with it! I loved the idea of your mother as your MOH! That is sooo sweet!
Mooshyboo
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Re: My sister will ruin my wedding... help
PS Good Luck to you
sarahradio5
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Re: My sister will ruin my wedding... help
I say have an invitation printed up with the WRONG DAY and TIME on it to throw her off so she won't even KNOW YOUR WEDDING IS GOING ON THAT DAY. I wouldn't want her in the same STATE as me. Seriously. Can you arrange a destination wedding and not tell her and just invite your close friends and family? YES... with a sister like that, I would go THAT far to keep her away from me on my wedding day. Maybe it's not my place to say, but you already had a 'preview' at your poor father's wedding. And YES... I would make your mom your MOH.
For your peace of mind, do everything you can to keep her away. I feel so bad that you are going through this. Good luck.
dplehat
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Re: My sister will ruin my wedding... help
First congrat on being preggo. I hope you have a hth 9 months. Now for the sister situation. Have your mom as your MOH. Your mom will feel honored and it gets you off the hook with having your sister. Second if you feel you have to have your sister there have her picked up AFTER the ceremony but have her wear a dress that is similar to your moms so it seems like she is in the bp. This way you have a say in what she wears and having her picked up means A) she is not driving high with a child on the car and B) you know exactly when she is arriving. Good luck and congrats again
causeimb
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Re: My sister will ruin my wedding... help
Posted by sarahradio5
I say have an invitation printed up with the WRONG DAY and TIME on it to throw her off so she won't even KNOW YOUR WEDDING IS GOING ON THAT DAY. I wouldn't want her in the same STATE as me. Seriously. Can you arrange a destination wedding and not tell her and just invite your close friends and family? YES... with a sister like that, I would go THAT far to keep her away from me on my wedding day. Maybe it's not my place to say, but you already had a 'preview' at your poor father's wedding. And YES... I would make your mom your MOH.
For your peace of mind, do everything you can to keep her away. I feel so bad that you are going through this. Good luck.
OMG I was thinking the same thing. Ill even make one for you and send it. You dont need the BS it's your day and you get to be the princess. She needs to stop being a brat and grow up just a bit Good Luck and Congrats on the baby
MJDoc12
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Re: My sister will ruin my wedding... help
i know it may be harsh---but i wouldn't invite her at all. she is nothin but trouble. i know it's a terrible thing to have to deal with, but you don't need her negativity.
i'd be sure to have someone on the look out for her the day of the wedding (like a security guard) and she not be invited. if you make her MOH--you will regret it forever.
Shellycakes123
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Re: My sister will ruin my wedding... help
maybe have 2 MOH
lexiandqaasim
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Re: My sister will ruin my wedding... help
Im so sorry you have to go through this always remember drug addicts cannot control their behavior, its so beyond their control to be 'normal' even for a night at the same note you need to think of your baby now and you dont need the stress of this i know its hard to face something like this, (my brother is in the same situation as your sister) but you have enough going on w. planning a wedding and sometimes even if it means to not invite some family members, especially if they are in these kind of situations its safer for all not to invite them.
luvabul
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Re: My sister will ruin my wedding... help
i TOTALLY agree, give her a diff date time lol
carolinebr
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Smiles111
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Re: My sister will ruin my wedding... help
Posted by sarahradio5
I say have an invitation printed up with the WRONG DAY and TIME on it to throw her off so she won't even KNOW YOUR WEDDING IS GOING ON THAT DAY. I wouldn't want her in the same STATE as me. Seriously. Can you arrange a destination wedding and not tell her and just invite your close friends and family? YES... with a sister like that, I would go THAT far to keep her away from me on my wedding day. Maybe it's not my place to say, but you already had a 'preview' at your poor father's wedding. And YES... I would make your mom your MOH.
For your peace of mind, do everything you can to keep her away. I feel so bad that you are going through this. Good luck.
Interesting idea!!!!!!!!!!
Or hire a bouncer for the door of your wedding and give him her picture. Seriously, do not even let her in!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Trishthedish
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Re: My sister will ruin my wedding... help
Posted by Smiles111
Posted by sarahradio5
I say have an invitation printed up with the WRONG DAY and TIME on it to throw her off so she won't even KNOW YOUR WEDDING IS GOING ON THAT DAY. I wouldn't want her in the same STATE as me. Seriously. Can you arrange a destination wedding and not tell her and just invite your close friends and family? YES... with a sister like that, I would go THAT far to keep her away from me on my wedding day. Maybe it's not my place to say, but you already had a 'preview' at your poor father's wedding. And YES... I would make your mom your MOH.
For your peace of mind, do everything you can to keep her away. I feel so bad that you are going through this. Good luck.
Interesting idea!!!!!!!!!!
Or hire a bouncer for the door of your wedding and give him her picture. Seriously, do not even let her in!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I agree with all the above. Do what you have to do to keep her away.
Good luck and congrats on your pregnancy and engagement!
ETAB
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Re: My sister will ruin my wedding... help
Congratulations on your engagement and pregnancy. I dont think your sister should be involved and I think it is really sweet to have ytour mom as MOH.
Your sister seems like she needs some help especially with the drug issue, have you guys tried getting her help?