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thanks for your help ladies!
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Re: please help me, i need your opinions....i dont know what to do
My initail thought is that it WOULD take away from your fh and I could understand that being upsetting for him. Also you will use the uniformity of all the guys in the same tux for pics and stuff
But........................... I also understand what your father is saying. I would try and find out if every person in the navy wears their navy tux or do some of them wear regular ones. If it is not ALWAYS done than I would probably want him to wear a regular tux.
This day is about you and your fh not the fact that your brother is in the Navy
good luck
But........................... I also understand what your father is saying. I would try and find out if every person in the navy wears their navy tux or do some of them wear regular ones. If it is not ALWAYS done than I would probably want him to wear a regular tux.
This day is about you and your fh not the fact that your brother is in the Navy
good luck
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Re: please help me, i need your opinions....i dont know what to do
Wow, that's a tough one. I really don't have anyone close to me in the military so I don't really know the procedures for this sort of thing. I know i have seen wedding pics w/ groomsmen in their uniform. I don't think it takes away from the groom (or you) at all. Have u spoken w/ your brother about this? How does he feel?
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Re: please help me, i need your opinions....i dont know what to do
Posted by jteach711
My initail thought is that it WOULD take away from your fh and I could understand that being upsetting for him. Also you will use the uniformity of all the guys in the same tux for pics and stuff
But........................... I also understand what your father is saying. I would try and find out if every person in the navy wears their navy tux or do some of them wear regular ones. If it is not ALWAYS done than I would probably want him to wear a regular tux.
This day is about you and your fh not the fact that your brother is in the Navy
good luck
i agree but also wonder what your brother has to say? i don't think your dad should push the issue - if your FH isn't comfortable with it, then he should do it.
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Re: please help me, i need your opinions....i dont know what to do
I was always under the impression that they wore their special uniform AFTER they graduated, you know, when they were officially in the Navy.
If that's not the case, then I can totally see both sides of this. Maybe he could wear it for one part and not the other (like for the church but not the reception or other way around)? How does your brother feel about it?
If that's not the case, then I can totally see both sides of this. Maybe he could wear it for one part and not the other (like for the church but not the reception or other way around)? How does your brother feel about it?
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Re: please help me, i need your opinions....i dont know what to do
My brother just says that he's fine doing whatever FH wants....he also said that if we want he could just put it on for some photos and thats it. I sense that part of him might want to wear it but i don't think he would ever fully say that to me. He wants us to do what we feel comfortable with. I just feel like i am cought in the middle of all of this. But i dont want to put FH in an awkward situation. My father is very persistent, and i dont want him or my brother to think that i dont care.....
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Re: please help me, i need your opinions....i dont know what to do
I think it's kind of crazy that Fh thinks that. Your brother is your brother, and everyone there know what his accomplishments are. He should wear the navy tux, and be proud of it!
I went to a wedding last summer with a similar situation. The bride's brother was in the marines. If he wasn't wearing the uniform, we would have thought that was strange. Her husband was not worried at all if he would take some of the attention away from him.
I went to a wedding last summer with a similar situation. The bride's brother was in the marines. If he wasn't wearing the uniform, we would have thought that was strange. Her husband was not worried at all if he would take some of the attention away from him.
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Re: please help me, i need your opinions....i dont know what to do
Posted by MrsQ-in2007
I was always under the impression that they wore their special uniform AFTER they graduated, you know, when they were officially in the Navy.
If that's not the case, then I can totally see both sides of this. Maybe he could wear it for one part and not the other (like for the church but not the reception or other way around)? How does your brother feel about it?
even though my brother didnt graduate yet...he already signed over his commitment to the military. At the academy they are required to do so after the second year....he is in his third year and considered being in the military even though he is still in school
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Re: please help me, i need your opinions....i dont know what to do
Being that I have family that have served in the Navy I can relate and understand what wearing that uniform represents and it is a very proud thing. On the other hand I understand your FH's reasoning to an extent. Maybe you can compromise and for pictures have your bro take pics in a regular Tuxedo and then change back into his other attire. That way he is not wearing it all day and can match with the other guys for some time. I dont think in anyway he will be showing you both up by wearing it . No matter what you both are the bride and groom and it is your special day and your bro is not going to take away from that . I am sure you tried speaking to your FH about this I hope you can come to a compromise. ![]()
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Re: please help me, i need your opinions....i dont know what to do
Posted by 111508Bride
I think it's kind of crazy that Fh thinks that. Your brother is your brother, and everyone there know what his accomplishments are. He should wear the navy tux, and be proud of it!
I went to a wedding last summer with a similar situation. The bride's brother was in the marines. If he wasn't wearing the uniform, we would have thought that was strange. Her husband was not worried at all if he would take some of the attention away from him.
yeah, i guess part of this whole ordeal is that...it does bother me a little bit that FH thinks that
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Re: please help me, i need your opinions....i dont know what to do
While I completely understand what your FH's feelings if it were me I would want my brother to wear his Navy tux. I would never think that it would take the attention away from the two of you.
Yes pictures may not be 100% uniform but this is something that he has worked hard for, it symbolizes so many things. Remember that the majority of the people at your wedding know your brother or at least know that he is in the Navy so its not like people are going to be 'why is he wearing that?'
I think it is kind of your brother to let you make the ulitmate decision, but I personally would want him to wear his Navy tux.
Yes pictures may not be 100% uniform but this is something that he has worked hard for, it symbolizes so many things. Remember that the majority of the people at your wedding know your brother or at least know that he is in the Navy so its not like people are going to be 'why is he wearing that?'
I think it is kind of your brother to let you make the ulitmate decision, but I personally would want him to wear his Navy tux.
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Re: please help me, i need your opinions....i dont know what to do
i dont think it would take away from your FH , he is the groom and everyone will know it ...it is almost like someone wearing white to your wedding ... while i wouldn't like it everyone knows who the bride is....this is much as your day as it is your FH let him decide however he feels about the dress code ...remember it is only a piece of clothing ..good luck with your decision
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Re: please help me, i need your opinions....i dont know what to do
OK FH being a Marine I completely understand what you are saying. I want him to wear his Blues (the uniform they were to formal events) for our ceremony. And then a tux for the reception and pics He said he will think about it. And I am fine with that.
BUT...we have a friend of his in our bridal party who is a Marine as well. i said I dont want him wearing his Blues to our ceremony. I am fine if he wears them to the reception. but to the ceremony if fh is in his blues (i know everyone knows he is the groom) i dont want someone else looking like him since it is not a common thing to wear you know. so i said even if fh doesnt wear them to the ceremony his GM is still not allowed to wear it lol MEAN maybe but its our wedding and even FH agrees. Plus we are going to have other Marines invited to our wedding which yes most likely will wear their blues to the reception. And tothe ceremony but that is because if they come they are doing the swords as we walk out of the church
but NO they are not required to wear them at every formal event and sometimes they dont want to because they are so uncomfortable. i know fh hates his Blues.
but good luck and i understand both sides of this situation! i think you need to ask your brother and then talk to your dad telling him your brothers decision!
BUT...we have a friend of his in our bridal party who is a Marine as well. i said I dont want him wearing his Blues to our ceremony. I am fine if he wears them to the reception. but to the ceremony if fh is in his blues (i know everyone knows he is the groom) i dont want someone else looking like him since it is not a common thing to wear you know. so i said even if fh doesnt wear them to the ceremony his GM is still not allowed to wear it lol MEAN maybe but its our wedding and even FH agrees. Plus we are going to have other Marines invited to our wedding which yes most likely will wear their blues to the reception. And tothe ceremony but that is because if they come they are doing the swords as we walk out of the church
but NO they are not required to wear them at every formal event and sometimes they dont want to because they are so uncomfortable. i know fh hates his Blues.
but good luck and i understand both sides of this situation! i think you need to ask your brother and then talk to your dad telling him your brothers decision!
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Re: please help me, i need your opinions....i dont know what to do
I would say for him to wear his dress uniform. It is both of your wedding day, and everyone that is going to 'your' wedding knows it. Everyone is ther for you and FH....it shouldn't matter what your bro is wearing. Maybe you should have FH and your bro talk about it. It is sort of what a military man is supposed to wear to events like that ESPECIALLY if you are having the ceremony in a church! Does your fh realize that you bro wearing his uniform is a sign of respect to you both at your wedding?
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Re: please help me, i need your opinions....i dont know what to do
I think it's inappropriate to have your brother change throughout the day.
Everyone there will know that you are the bride and that FH is the groom. No one can take the attention away from that.
Good Luck, and maybe you can show FH what the girls on LIW think,and your problem will be solved :)
Everyone there will know that you are the bride and that FH is the groom. No one can take the attention away from that.
Good Luck, and maybe you can show FH what the girls on LIW think,and your problem will be solved :)
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Re: please help me, i need your opinions....i dont know what to do
Posted by MrsQ-in2007
I was always under the impression that they wore their special uniform AFTER they graduated, you know, when they were officially in the Navy.
If that's not the case, then I can totally see both sides of this. Maybe he could wear it for one part and not the other (like for the church but not the reception or other way around)? How does your brother feel about it?
technically you are right. But the thing is according to FH and the Marines but since hte Marines are part of the Navy it might go for them as well:
they are not really supposed to be wearing their uniform out anywhere except if they are attending a Marine Corps function, or if they are instructed to do so by the commanding officer, or if they are doing recruiting leave (which means they are home on leave and helping out the recruiting officers by getting people to join the military)
just an FYI haha
but i think fh you and your brother should all talk about it and how it makes you all feel. and no decision is the wrong decision in this case to me!
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Re: please help me, i need your opinions....i dont know what to do
I wouldn't be too hard on FH, I can see how he would feel. But I also think it is an honor to have your brother there in his dress uniform.
I think I would try to talk to FH about it and hope he would come around!
I think I would try to talk to FH about it and hope he would come around!
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Re: please help me, i need your opinions....i dont know what to do
A good compromise might be tux for the ceremony Blue for the reception? AT least you will have pictures of both but the ceremony will give your FH the look & attention he wants
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Re: please help me, i need your opinions....i dont know what to do
i know they wear dress blues at formal events - but your brother isnt the groom? i could see him wearing the outfit if it was HIS wedding but since its not i think its okay if he just wears a regular tux like all the other groomsmen. i wouldnt want my FH to feel uncomfortable - i'd ask my brother to just wear the tux. hopefully one day your brother can wear his dress blues at his own wedding and make Dad happy then......
maybe if it doesnt bother you or your FH then you can let your brother decide what he wants to wear......let the decision be his......but if my FH was uncomfortable about it, i would ask my brother to just wear a regular tux......
maybe if it doesnt bother you or your FH then you can let your brother decide what he wants to wear......let the decision be his......but if my FH was uncomfortable about it, i would ask my brother to just wear a regular tux......
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Re: please help me, i need your opinions....i dont know what to do
Posted by 111508Bride
I think it's kind of crazy that Fh thinks that. Your brother is your brother, and everyone there know what his accomplishments are. He should wear the navy tux, and be proud of it!
I went to a wedding last summer with a similar situation. The bride's brother was in the marines. If he wasn't wearing the uniform, we would have thought that was strange. Her husband was not worried at all if he would take some of the attention away from him.
I don't think you can say that you think it is crazy for her fh to feel that way. I know I would not want one of my bm's to be waering something different from everyone else.
If wearing your dress blues is not mandatory than there really is no reason that he HAS to wear it to his sisters wedding. Maybe he should save it for his wedding.
People forget that it is the guys wedding also and I would not want people to disreguard what I felt so how could I do that to my fh. I think you ABSOLUTELY have to take fh's feelings into consideration
