Did anyone just want to elope?

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Posted by Future Mulligan

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Posted by cherish83

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Posted by Future Mulligan

awww yes - i feel like that as of lately - never felt like that during the planning until now - im 43 days away so im starting to get a little stressed out - and it makes me wonder why we would do this to ourselves the closer it gets the more i realize alot of the things that i want are truly unecessary because i just want to be his wife....so yeah, sometimes i catch myself thinking why didnt we just elope but then i think about all those unecessary things and to be honest, i do want all that crap hahahaha....so i know it will work out in the end.....

for you its a little diff b/c you are feeling this way because of something that happened at home - but dont let it get to you, im sure things will blow over.....Fh and I live on our own and we are planning and paying for the wedding ourselves, so not having our parents around is probably a good thing i can totally see how it could be stressful for the bride living at home! i cant imagine living back home in general, let alone trying to plan a wedding - but sometimes i get sad b/c my family isnt involved in the planning at all because they are far away, and since i dont want to hear their opinions i dont ask for them - we kind of just did whatever we wanted - but sometimes i think it would be nice if they were more involved - so i guess no matter what way you have it, you think things could always somehow be better....

hang in there!

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Thanks.. I know what you mean. I mean I live at home and they are not as involved as I would like them to be. My sister is my MOH. She's only 18 so I know she doesnt quite know what she should be doing. But she hasnt really offered to help with anything. The only time my mom giver her opinion is to disagree with something I like. I get depressed when I see my other friends mom or some of the moms of the girls on here wanting to be so involved in the wedding and I dont see why she cant be like that. I have to beg her to want to do stuff.

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well if it makes you feel any better my maid of honor is my sis, she is 17 and lives in florida so she hasnt done anything either but i expected that, i mean she lives far away, she doesnt have a job and she doesnt know anything about weddings she has never even been to one....

and maybe this will really make you feel better - my mom makes me feel like my wedding is one big expense to her...i mean complaining about how much money its going to cost to get plane tickets, and a hotel and they had to buy dresses and shoes (FYI i paid for 1/2 of my sisters dress) and my mom was supposed to buy my dress for me, but then didnt and FH got stuck paying for it....all these things though, were expected....but they always have to make sure i know its costing them money - and they havent offered to help at all....i know my mom helped with my shower and i didnt hear anything about it amazingly - im not sure how much she contributed though, im sure she gave my FSIL who planned it an earful but she did come with my sister and didnt complain which was really nice for a change....i dont know, its just something i am used to - i try not to hold it against them or get upset b/c this is just the way they are.....my FHs family is VERY different, very loving, and very generous even when they dont have money and they are soooo excited for the weddings its all they talk about - so i know what you mean about when you see other families being excited - im kind of in the same boat - it helps that they are far away though.....

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Thanks Nik, Its a lil comforting to have someone understand where I am coming from. I know my mom did a lot for my shower, and that two of my BMs did NOTHING, which she feels she has to constantly remind me of. I think she doesnt feel like I appreciate it all.

Am I being stubborn if I ignore her until she approaches me, because I feel like I did nothing wrong and I hate apologizing and giving her the satisfaction that she feels she was again right.

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Posted by cherish83

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Posted by Future Mulligan

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Posted by cherish83

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Posted by Future Mulligan

awww yes - i feel like that as of lately - never felt like that during the planning until now - im 43 days away so im starting to get a little stressed out - and it makes me wonder why we would do this to ourselves the closer it gets the more i realize alot of the things that i want are truly unecessary because i just want to be his wife....so yeah, sometimes i catch myself thinking why didnt we just elope but then i think about all those unecessary things and to be honest, i do want all that crap hahahaha....so i know it will work out in the end.....

for you its a little diff b/c you are feeling this way because of something that happened at home - but dont let it get to you, im sure things will blow over.....Fh and I live on our own and we are planning and paying for the wedding ourselves, so not having our parents around is probably a good thing i can totally see how it could be stressful for the bride living at home! i cant imagine living back home in general, let alone trying to plan a wedding - but sometimes i get sad b/c my family isnt involved in the planning at all because they are far away, and since i dont want to hear their opinions i dont ask for them - we kind of just did whatever we wanted - but sometimes i think it would be nice if they were more involved - so i guess no matter what way you have it, you think things could always somehow be better....

hang in there!

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Thanks.. I know what you mean. I mean I live at home and they are not as involved as I would like them to be. My sister is my MOH. She's only 18 so I know she doesnt quite know what she should be doing. But she hasnt really offered to help with anything. The only time my mom giver her opinion is to disagree with something I like. I get depressed when I see my other friends mom or some of the moms of the girls on here wanting to be so involved in the wedding and I dont see why she cant be like that. I have to beg her to want to do stuff.

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well if it makes you feel any better my maid of honor is my sis, she is 17 and lives in florida so she hasnt done anything either but i expected that, i mean she lives far away, she doesnt have a job and she doesnt know anything about weddings she has never even been to one....

and maybe this will really make you feel better - my mom makes me feel like my wedding is one big expense to her...i mean complaining about how much money its going to cost to get plane tickets, and a hotel and they had to buy dresses and shoes (FYI i paid for 1/2 of my sisters dress) and my mom was supposed to buy my dress for me, but then didnt and FH got stuck paying for it....all these things though, were expected....but they always have to make sure i know its costing them money - and they havent offered to help at all....i know my mom helped with my shower and i didnt hear anything about it amazingly - im not sure how much she contributed though, im sure she gave my FSIL who planned it an earful but she did come with my sister and didnt complain which was really nice for a change....i dont know, its just something i am used to - i try not to hold it against them or get upset b/c this is just the way they are.....my FHs family is VERY different, very loving, and very generous even when they dont have money and they are soooo excited for the weddings its all they talk about - so i know what you mean about when you see other families being excited - im kind of in the same boat - it helps that they are far away though.....

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Thanks Nik, Its a lil comforting to have someone understand where I am coming from. I know my mom did a lot for my shower, and that two of my BMs did NOTHING, which she feels she has to constantly remind me of. I think she doesnt feel like I appreciate it all.

Am I being stubborn if I ignore her until she approaches me, because I feel like I did nothing wrong and I hate apologizing and giving her the satisfaction that she feels she was again right.

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that is how my mom is - she constantly has to bring up money and remind me how much money things are going to cost her, or how much it did cost her - i dont know why she does it and it annoys the crap out of me....i guess that is what parents are for!

i dont have any idea about what you should do - when my mom and i get into tiffs we usually just both ignore eachother for awhile and then it blows over - but that is probably bad advice

I've been bickering with my mom since I got engaged. I try to make-up with her soon after because I want my day to be sepcial for both of us. IN my case she feels like I haven't included her enough, whereas I feel like I always show her what I want and am doing and my ideas and ask her what she thinks.

Honestly, i think this whole wedding process is just as on on the parents...expecially the parents of the bride. I think there just are a lot of mixed emotions. Mostly happy but, also nostalgic, maybe a sense of loss.

Just try to talk to your mom and let her know that you don't want to argue that you just want this day to be special for the both of you.

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Posted by Future Mulligan

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Posted by cherish83

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Posted by Future Mulligan

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Posted by cherish83

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Posted by Future Mulligan

awww yes - i feel like that as of lately - never felt like that during the planning until now - im 43 days away so im starting to get a little stressed out - and it makes me wonder why we would do this to ourselves the closer it gets the more i realize alot of the things that i want are truly unecessary because i just want to be his wife....so yeah, sometimes i catch myself thinking why didnt we just elope but then i think about all those unecessary things and to be honest, i do want all that crap hahahaha....so i know it will work out in the end.....

for you its a little diff b/c you are feeling this way because of something that happened at home - but dont let it get to you, im sure things will blow over.....Fh and I live on our own and we are planning and paying for the wedding ourselves, so not having our parents around is probably a good thing i can totally see how it could be stressful for the bride living at home! i cant imagine living back home in general, let alone trying to plan a wedding - but sometimes i get sad b/c my family isnt involved in the planning at all because they are far away, and since i dont want to hear their opinions i dont ask for them - we kind of just did whatever we wanted - but sometimes i think it would be nice if they were more involved - so i guess no matter what way you have it, you think things could always somehow be better....

hang in there!

---

Thanks.. I know what you mean. I mean I live at home and they are not as involved as I would like them to be. My sister is my MOH. She's only 18 so I know she doesnt quite know what she should be doing. But she hasnt really offered to help with anything. The only time my mom giver her opinion is to disagree with something I like. I get depressed when I see my other friends mom or some of the moms of the girls on here wanting to be so involved in the wedding and I dont see why she cant be like that. I have to beg her to want to do stuff.

---

well if it makes you feel any better my maid of honor is my sis, she is 17 and lives in florida so she hasnt done anything either but i expected that, i mean she lives far away, she doesnt have a job and she doesnt know anything about weddings she has never even been to one....

and maybe this will really make you feel better - my mom makes me feel like my wedding is one big expense to her...i mean complaining about how much money its going to cost to get plane tickets, and a hotel and they had to buy dresses and shoes (FYI i paid for 1/2 of my sisters dress) and my mom was supposed to buy my dress for me, but then didnt and FH got stuck paying for it....all these things though, were expected....but they always have to make sure i know its costing them money - and they havent offered to help at all....i know my mom helped with my shower and i didnt hear anything about it amazingly - im not sure how much she contributed though, im sure she gave my FSIL who planned it an earful but she did come with my sister and didnt complain which was really nice for a change....i dont know, its just something i am used to - i try not to hold it against them or get upset b/c this is just the way they are.....my FHs family is VERY different, very loving, and very generous even when they dont have money and they are soooo excited for the weddings its all they talk about - so i know what you mean about when you see other families being excited - im kind of in the same boat - it helps that they are far away though.....

---

Thanks Nik, Its a lil comforting to have someone understand where I am coming from. I know my mom did a lot for my shower, and that two of my BMs did NOTHING, which she feels she has to constantly remind me of. I think she doesnt feel like I appreciate it all.

Am I being stubborn if I ignore her until she approaches me, because I feel like I did nothing wrong and I hate apologizing and giving her the satisfaction that she feels she was again right.

---

that is how my mom is - she constantly has to bring up money and remind me how much money things are going to cost her, or how much it did cost her - i dont know why she does it and it annoys the crap out of me....i guess that is what parents are for!

i dont have any idea about what you should do - when my mom and i get into tiffs we usually just both ignore eachother for awhile and then it blows over - but that is probably bad advice

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Thanks Nik. I dont know why they need to make us feel like crap. I cant wait to move out and upstate!

I thought about it a million times during the process. I had some mom and MOH issues that did not make it easy. And now that it is over I am releived ! That being said, I am so glad I had the big wedding, despite all the drama. Just take a step back from everyone ( i didn't see my mom or MOH for a month until the wedding day ) to avoid any added stress.

I would never do it again but I am glad I did it

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Posted by bluekat16



I've been bickering with my mom since I got engaged. I try to make-up with her soon after because I want my day to be sepcial for both of us. IN my case she feels like I haven't included her enough, whereas I feel like I always show her what I want and am doing and my ideas and ask her what she thinks.

Honestly, i think this whole wedding process is just as on on the parents...expecially the parents of the bride. I think there just are a lot of mixed emotions. Mostly happy but, also nostalgic, maybe a sense of loss.

Just try to talk to your mom and let her know that you don't want to argue that you just want this day to be special for the both of you.

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Thanks and I know that it all stems from her feeling she is losing me.. blah blah blah! I dont know when I will approah it, but I will. Thanks

Yes, we thought about eloping constantly. It was so stressful. It will be over soon and you will be married and your day will be perfection! I promise!

Just wanted to send some your way.
Hope this blows over soon.

Oh Megs - I've been there. My mom made me cry on the way to the church! She aggravated the piss out of me.

At least you'll lose weight by not eating? I don't mean that - just trying to keep it light.

It will ALL be worth it. Every fight with mom, every fight with FH, every little thing that made you happy, sad, angry, confused - it will all be worth it. I promise you. Hang in there.

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Posted by LuvMyAlfonse

Oh Megs - I've been there. My mom made me cry on the way to the church! She aggravated the piss out of me.

At least you'll lose weight by not eating? I don't mean that - just trying to keep it light.

It will ALL be worth it. Every fight with mom, every fight with FH, every little thing that made you happy, sad, angry, confused - it will all be worth it. I promise you. Hang in there.

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Thanks.. and I know you dont mean it (about losing weight, but i thought of that) Even though i know its not healthy, I just cant right now.

I dont get moms!! Like seriously, why on the way to church? Freakin bite your tongue!

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Posted by Songstress

I really wanted to elope and even now wish we had. Its normal. Things will get better. I dont know what you and your mom fought about but you guys will make up and you will have a beautiful and perfect wedding.

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Thanks Lea... i explained it before.. but all i did was ask her why she opened my RSVPs yesterday. Probably the last couple I'll get. She flipped out on me and said some really hurtful things.

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Posted by cherish83

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Posted by Songstress

I really wanted to elope and even now wish we had. Its normal. Things will get better. I dont know what you and your mom fought about but you guys will make up and you will have a beautiful and perfect wedding.

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Thanks Lea... i explained it before.. but all i did was ask her why she opened my RSVPs yesterday. Probably the last couple I'll get. She flipped out on me and said some really hurtful things.

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That was really unnecessary of her. She needs to realize RSVP's are exciting for brides. I hope she apologizes to you.