Did I take this too far? (this one is a bit lengthy)

Original post by jovigirl414

Aug 02, 2011 07:33 AM

I got an email last night from a family member, canceling their RSVP. This woman had a minor tiff with my mother a few weeks ago, and we pretty much called that this was going to happen. Here is the email:

Hi Nicole...i had to write you cos I am deeply saddened that we cannot make your wedding. I had planned on it but so far Santos car needed repair, Steven, who has never asked me for money since I'm here needed money to pay the rent and now my ac is broke and thats another $350. The wedding is also on Friday so Santo would have to take the day off and lose a days pay and right now we just cant afford it. I am still only working part time. He doesnt even have a sports jacket so his outfil would cost at least $200 and then shoes, tie, etc. and I need an outfit and shoes, gas. It would cost at least $600 to come and thats not even with the gift. I feel so bad that I am going to miss the best day of your life but I just can't afford it right now. I wish you all the best and much happiness. Please send me your address so that I can send you a little something. So sorry....Love Aunt Linda

I responded with this:

Omg, please tell me you are joking, I already paid for your plates! I've been working two jobs all year so we can save every penny for this wedding, yes, the biggest day of our lives. I don't care that Santo won't be wearing a jacket - its late August, too hot for one anyway. Brian has about 30 ties, we can leave one at your table for him to throw on, if that is a deciding factor. It's a late wedding - Santo would only have to take a half day, at most. Not to mention, I could care less about a wedding gift, I think you already know that. The real gift to me would be my FAMILY celebrating with me. I understood you missing the engagement party, as well as my father's wake because you were living in Florida at the time. I even got over you missing the shower because Santo couldnt take you out for your birthday on Saturday instead of Sunday. But now you are telling me you won't make it to the wedding, a month after you already RSVP'd yes? I'm sorry, that hurts a little too much. There was plenty of time to figure out if travel expenses were feasible, I can't help but feel like you just don't want to come for some underlying reason. I would expect stuff like this from my father's side of the family, not my mothers.

Was it too much? Or should I be proud?

mybabylovesmoi Posted: Aug 02, 2011 01:46 PM

Re: Did I take this too far? (this one is a bit lengthy)

I think your response was perfect. I think people are ridiculous

MrsDtoB Posted: Aug 02, 2011 02:47 PM

Re: Did I take this too far? (this one is a bit lengthy)

good for you!! You just inspired me to write a message back to a 'friend' who just didn't show up to my bridal shower on sunday!

MarryingMyBFF1110 Posted: Aug 02, 2011 02:57 PM

Re: Did I take this too far? (this one is a bit lengthy)

My favorite part was when she asked you for your address to send you 'a little something'

macetona1 Posted: Aug 02, 2011 03:53 PM

Re: Did I take this too far? (this one is a bit lengthy)

Posted by JTG4EVER

I say...good for you!!!! There are so many things I want to say to people and never do. I'm proud of you. You are my inspiration. You said how you feel and you are right. She had a long time to save for all this. And if there is an underlying reason, then man up and tell you about it. I think you did good and you called her out. Keep us posted on what happens!

ITA Good for you

I had the same thing happening to me but with my brother.