Did you take your FMIL or FSIL to look for your dress?

LIPrincess00 Posted: Sep 02, 2003 03:53 PM

Did you take your FMIL or FSIL to look for your dress?

I am not sure if I have to bring them. I really just want to go with my mom and sister (MOH). I really dont want to bring them but dont know the proper etiquette. I want to add that my FMIL is not asking to go, but my FSIl wants to be the only one to go. Help.

CherylBooch Posted: Sep 02, 2003 03:56 PM

Re: Did you take your FMIL or FSIL to look for your dress?

How about taking FMIL and FSIL to ONE of the places to look at dresses?? you'll proabably go to more than one place, on different days, so invite them to one outing. They'll feel special and included, and if they are lucky, they'll be there when you find 'the one.'
(This is what I did with mine, worked like a charm)

franksbride Posted: Sep 02, 2003 03:56 PM

Re: Did you take your FMIL or FSIL to look for your dress?

I think etiquette would say that your FMIL and your FSIL should not be there!!!

SeptemberBride03 Posted: Sep 02, 2003 03:58 PM

Re: Did you take your FMIL or FSIL to look for your dress?

Do what you're comfortable with. I would say the tradition is just your Mom and BMs. I did bring my MIL and FSIL but I'm very close with them and so is my Mom.

Irishbride Posted: Sep 02, 2003 03:58 PM

Re: Did you take your FMIL or FSIL to look for your dress?

I agree with Franksbride.

HearzBellz Posted: Sep 02, 2003 03:58 PM

Re: Did you take your FMIL or FSIL to look for your dress?

Definately not. Not to knock anyone who took their FM/SIL.. that is your choice.... but you are by nomeans obligated to bring FIL's to go dress shopping.

I vehemently argued to not let FIL's go b/c I knew they would tell FH what the dress looked like.

NovemberSue Posted: Sep 02, 2003 03:59 PM

Re: Did you take your FMIL or FSIL to look for your dress?

I asked my FMIL to go but she had something to do that day.(dr appt or something)
So then I told her I will bring her the next time I look. I felt bad because I ended up finding my dress on the first day.
I brought her back with me the next time I went and put it on to show her.

What-Now Posted: Sep 02, 2003 04:00 PM

Re: Did you take your FMIL or FSIL to look for your dress?

My policy is: the less people are involved the easier it is on the bride!

Olgaki Posted: Sep 02, 2003 04:01 PM

Re: Did you take your FMIL or FSIL to look for your dress?

Since FI's mom lives in South Jersey and I live in Queens,she couldn't do a lot of dress shopping with me. BUT! When I thought I found the one, I took her to see it before deciding. I put it on and she started crying - it was a moment Then I took mom and FI's mom and we ordered it together. She has no daughters and I know always wanted them so I wanted to include her

suven Posted: Sep 02, 2003 04:01 PM

Re: Did you take your FMIL or FSIL to look for your dress?

Jordan Posted: Sep 02, 2003 04:04 PM

Re: Did you take your FMIL or FSIL to look for your dress?

How about a compromise...once you've FOUND the dress, ask the FMIL & FSIL to go with you to see it.

I only brought my best friend (one of my BMs) and when I ordered the dress and had to get fitted (I tried it on again ), I brought my stepmom and 2 of my BMs. Unfortunately, my MOH (sister) lives out of state .

Bottom line: do what YOU WANT to do.

HearzBellz Posted: Sep 02, 2003 04:05 PM

Re: Did you take your FMIL or FSIL to look for your dress?

I think it is great for the girls that have really good relationships with their MILs, but also consider how your mother & Moh will feel... it may make them feel less important with other people around. JMHO

Diane Posted: Sep 02, 2003 04:14 PM

Re: Did you take your FMIL or FSIL to look for your dress?

I think it is great to bring them, I did..well my MIL

juju Posted: Sep 02, 2003 04:15 PM

Re: Did you take your FMIL or FSIL to look for your dress?

If I had the choice, I would of only taken my mom. But, since my mom lived out of town (she had already looked at dresses with me in Tx) I asked my fmil and fstepmil to come along. I thought it would be nice and since they are paying for part of the wedding, I wanted them to feel apart of the decision process. They were both thrilled to see me try on dresses. I went to a zillion stores and invited them to 2 stores. I ended up buying a dress they haven't seen me in. So, I feel less guilty now that neither my mom or fmils have seen me in my dress. I just didn't want to hear it after the wedding that they were not part of the wedding process. That's me always trying to do the right thing. Good Luck to you

dkga1026 Posted: Sep 02, 2003 04:19 PM

Re: Did you take your FMIL or FSIL to look for your dress?

Unless you're really close with either of them, or really admire their taste/opinion then I would say don't take them. You are definitely not obligated to! As a matter of fact, the less people you take, the better it will be for you. I took only my mom the first time and then my FSIL just to pick between the 2 that I had decided on because I valued her opinion.

Have fun!

dcbride Posted: Sep 02, 2003 04:23 PM

Re: Did you take your FMIL or FSIL to look for your dress?

Don't bring them. The woman at bridal reflections told me not to bring my fmil until the final fitting but I didn't listen. I took her with me to one store and she was angry every time I didn't like a dress she liked- and the dresses she liked were not very nice. Then she would say things like 'FI and I have the same tastes- so if I don't like it FH won't like it.' I ended up getting a dress that I know she will hate. We will see on Sat. She also was shocked at every pricetag and is still insisting I could have worn her dress.

Kelly9904 Posted: Sep 02, 2003 04:25 PM

Re: Did you take your FMIL or FSIL to look for your dress?

I am just beginning my dress search but here is what I have decided to do. My mom says she has waited a long time for her ONLY daughter to get married and requested that as we search I dont bring my FMIL but what I am going to do is ask her to come along AFTER i have picked out a dress, so when I go to order the dress I am going to invite her along.

babybride Posted: Sep 02, 2003 04:25 PM

Re: Did you take your FMIL or FSIL to look for your dress?

You are definately not obligated too. I wanted my FMIL to come with me. She only has two sons so I wanted her to have a part in this. But I also didn't want to take away from this moment with my mom. So I did my dress shopping with my mom and went to all the stores and when I narrowed it down to two dresses I brought her with us to try them on again.

smooch Posted: Sep 02, 2003 04:41 PM

Re: Did you take your FMIL or FSIL to look for your dress?

You are not obligated to. It's nice if you want to, and you think your FMIL will behave, but you don't have to.

I asked FMIL if she wanted to go. She's got 7 sons and 1 daughter. When her one daughter got married, she didn't bring FMIL, so FMIL missed out on the opporunity to go dress shopping. Well, I tried to give her that opportunity so I asked her, but she didn't come, which was fine because I only did it to be nice, I really wanted to go with my mom. I went with my mom and we found it on the first trip.

When my sister was home for the e-party, I took her and a few BMs dress shopping. I showed them the dress when we were at that store.

You know who I regret not taking? My dad. I guess he wanted to go. I never even considered it. I thought he'd be bored. But he was sad he didn't get to go. So I tried to take him on other trips - to the florist. I took my whole family to the florist except my sister because she lives in San Fran. My dad, brother, and DH never came to another vendor... Tee hee hee! They were so bored.