I just found out that someone we know is getting divorced. They just got married 4 months ago. Did the whole Huge wedding etc. It was an amazing wedding, best one i have been to so far, so my question is, how would you feel, if you participated in all the prewedding festivities and then boom the couple breaks up.
Its not sitting right with me at all right now.
Kimbalina
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Re: Divorce Question-How would you feel?
Did anyone see that coming? (the divorce)
Sometimes you hear people are getting married and you are like 'oh no that is a bad idea' in your own head.. other times it just is a shock when it doesnt work.
loislane
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Re: Divorce Question-How would you feel?
This is why it's better to call a wedding off then to go through it and end up like this. I think they are worried about the money they'll be out for the wedding or they are embarassed to call it off I also think sometimes people think that whatever problems they have in their relationship before they marry that the marriage will fix it, unfortch it doesn't.
MrsHtobe
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FH's family friend was divorced this quickly too. I think sometimes people get engaged because its the 'next logical step'
They get so caught up in the hype that they don't realize how big of a mistake they are making until a month or so in - when the wedding is over, and its just them again. . . I think its sad
truelove5803
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I was in the same situation...but they got married because she got pregnant. I didn't last past the 4 month mark. But we knew it from the beginning, so it wasn't that bad.
Kimbalina
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Some people get married even though durning their engagement they realize that they should not be getting married, out of fear and or embarrassment for calling off the wedding.
AR31
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FH's brother got divorced a year or so into the marriage.. and that was right about the time when we started dating.. FH and his family were seriously affected by it.. his mother got really really sick.. his dad withdrew.. (his family is very old school) and FH put me in hot seat.. it was as though he wanted to be sure before anything was said or done..
meanwhile his brother was dating up a storm.. up and down the east coast.. and just wanted to get married to anyone!! it was as though being married would make you more of a man or something.. and the one he ended up with now will give chatty cathy a run for her money.. and FMIL, FFIL and FH just have to bite the bullet everytime she's around..
bottom line being.. people need find out about themselves before they jump into marriage.. unfortunately for several people being single and unmarried after a certain age is a taboo..
cammolax23
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Re: Divorce Question-How would you feel?
one of the guys I worked with was dating this girl for 2 years, they got married, and she filed for divorce 2 WEEKS later! he told me they didnt want to get married but they didnt want to call the wedding off because they were so embarrassed and didnt want to loose out on the money... they didnt even spend the wedding night together cause they got into a big fight!! ( how freakin ridiculous can you be )
mRm2008
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This is what happened to my cousin. She CAUGHT her FH cheating on her (in their home!!)) a few months before their upcoming wedding. Because she felt so 'locked in' they continued on had the big huge wedding. They were divorced w/in a 2 month time period. Although it was a beautiful event that people enjoyed the word got out rather quick when they split. The family was devasted. Usually when a split happens that close after a wedding, it makes you think that SOMETHING had happened before. So sad
Espo22
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Re: Divorce Question-How would you feel?
its very sad and horrible to see it happening to people you know. Theres nothing we can personally do in the situation but be there for them as friends if need be.
loislane
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Re: Divorce Question-How would you feel?
the loosing out on the money think cracks me up because isn't a divorce more money then any big type of wedding can cost. Plus I mean wouldn't people be pissed they laid out all this money as a gift to celebrate your union and 2 weeks later you are filing and then it goes to nothing? it's like 60 bucsk to get a marriage license and thousands to divorce, funny.
ChristineAaron08
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Re: Divorce Question-How would you feel?
i dont think i would feel any different if i had or had not participated in their pre wedding stuff. Its just sad that they realized after the fact that it wasnt going to work.
Mici n KC
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This happened to someone I know as well and I was in the wedding.
Kimbalina
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My FIL's were married 25 years and then had a divorce. I think that for them... it was for the best.
I have friends who now are married and they have blow outs, and you think that this is the last straw and it wont end well. But it has so far. I hope that FH and I can work through up's and down's.
Future Mulligan
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it would annoy me if i spent a lot on gifts for them and then they divorced immediately after the wedding - it wouldnt sit right with me either....
futuremrsfab
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do you think they knew before the wedding that it wasnt going to work out?
Espo22
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Posted by Future Mulligan
it would annoy me if i spent a lot on gifts for them and then they divorced immediately after the wedding - it wouldnt sit right with me either....
oh wait is this why it doesn't sit well with you nicole. I was a bit confused with the way it was worded and it not sitting right with you. Is it bc of money spent on their wedding?
TheFutureMrsM
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i agree with alot of what everyone has said, i am glad to see that many of you have dealt with this situation.
This is also someone who told me that i was abnormal for having a long engagement lol.
They lived together for a while before, and i think they got married cause everyone around them was, and it was the next logical step.
I guess hearing about this yesterday, and then talking to my neighbor who is getting divorced as well, its like shocking...it also makes me wonder will this happen to me, like why am i above these things happeneing.
Its just such a bad way to think but hearing 2 divorce stories yesterday pushed me over the edge
iwannabmrsD
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Re: Divorce Question-How would you feel?
Posted by TheFutureMrsM
I just found out that someone we know is getting divorced. They just got married 4 months ago. Did the whole Huge wedding etc. It was an amazing wedding, best one i have been to so far, so my question is, how would you feel, if you participated in all the prewedding festivities and then boom the couple breaks up.
Its not sitting right with me at all right now.
prewedding festivities.. u mean such as the bridal shower (gift) bachelorette party (money) wedding( another gift) bridal party ( dress, shoes, hair, make up, etc)?
yeah i think i'd be a little perturbed too..
diva7531
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Re: Divorce Question-How would you feel?
I don't know how I would feel. I agree with the PP's that some people do it either for the next step or because they have already spent 'too much' money.
