DJ for a Black Tie Wedding?

I have to admit, if I were invited to a Black Tie wedding, I would probably go into it thinking 'OH I wonder which band is playing?!' I love dancing at weddings and have been known to cut the proverbial rug....alone. Having said that, ultimately it wouldn't matter to me as a guest if there was a DJ or a Band, it's the SONGS that matter...go with whatever you love!

There are several DJs that specialize in Black Tie or classier affairs. Not sure if you picked out a DJ yet but several come wiht live musicians or live singers, etc. We are using Tom Gordon and he is the traditional price of a DJ but includes a live singer during dinner and at certain places, a sax and piano player during the cocktail hour.

I have also heard very good things about Starry Night.

Sassy go into retirement already, you were married almost 2 years ago!! Are the things you had at your wedding even still in style anymore?????? LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL

Well, it sounds like the opinions run the gamut here. Some think a DJ would definitely be acceptable at a black-tie affair, some think it definitely wouldn't, and some just seem to be nuts . Hopefully most of the answers have been helpful. I know it's hard to juggle what you want vs. expectations vs. budget allocation!

I'm sorry but this has got to be the dumbest thing I have heard in awhile. A Black Tie event DO NOT IN ANY WAY SHAPE OR FORM mean you have to have a band. I worked with an events company before and they had many black tie affairs AND a DJ. Whoever is telling you otherwise is WRONG.

It's the music that counts. That is way more important.

And while ars194 seems a little nuts, she does have a point on something...

Some have stated that having a Black Tie affair would inconvenience the guests. What a late sunday evening or friday wedding where people would have to take off or leave work early is also inconveniencing the guests. I admit, I am inconveniencing my guest becuase my wedding is on a Friday at 3pm, so everyone would have to take off. Howver, I AM CHEAP! LOLOL! But, anyway, I just wanted to point that out.

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Posted by Sassyz75

For me personally if I was wearing a ball gown and my husband was renting a tux (as he doesn't own one) i'd rather have a band and the type of elegance and formality it brings then a pasta course and a viennesse. To me, there is formality and elegance that live music brings that cannot be recreated by a DJ.

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So are you saying that a wedding with a DJ is not as elegant as a wedding with a band?

Wow, some of this is out of control.....

Anyway, honestly, if I saw 'Black tie' on an invitation, the only thing I would really be thinking about is what I would wear. If I am in the mood to dance, it doesn't matter if it is a band or a DJ. Do what you want Marymoon, it's your day.

WHEW!

The drama mamas are out in force, and it looks like we have a new one!

Thanks for all of the opinions. The jury is still out on this one. I'm wondering what factors make or break a 'black tie' wedding, for example what our most confrontational posters said is a consideration, how much difference does the dya of the week make? I've already made my day of the week choice,etc, but it's still something to think about.

Please suggest some classy bands and DJ's! I guess I have more research (and saving) to do!

Wow...what a heated discussion.

Jenn, I do feel that a band adds elegance to an affair, but I always enjoy a DJ as well. I would be very surprised if I got an invitation that said 'Black tie' and there was a DJ there. However, as the post above me says, eliminating all the plastic handouts, like leis and sunglasses, definitely increases the classiness.

Our wedding was Black Tie optional, and was on a Sunday night. There is certainly no rule (unlike someone so rudely and ignorantly stated) that black tie optional or preferred can only be saturday night. I have been to many that were sunday nights. I have even been to them on sunday afternoons, which I thought was a little strange, but didn't bother me.

I feel that writing 'Black Tie' (without the 'optional' or 'preferred') is an imposition to many guests, and I think I would be rather taken aback to go to an affair where everyone was wearing tuxes and ballgowns and there was a DJ...JMHO.

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Posted by Jax430
I feel that writing 'Black Tie' (without the 'optional' or 'preferred') is an imposition to many guests, and I think I would be rather taken aback to go to an affair where everyone was wearing tuxes and ballgowns and there was a DJ...JMHO.

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Can you please explain why that is? I don't understand the 'imposition'.

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Posted by ars194

Sassy go into retirement already, you were married almost 2 years ago!! Are the things you had at your wedding even still in style anymore?????? LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL

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There are plenty of women on here who have been married for a year or two or more, and it's usually APPRECIATED that we give our opinions and share our experiences.

If you keep up the attitude, you will quickly learn that children like you are not welcome here.

As for your comment that only idiots would have a black tie wedding on a night other than Saturday, I have to say that I am proud to be that type of 'idiot' rather than someone who is so nasty and insecure!

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Posted by CubanBride

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Posted by Jax430
I feel that writing 'Black Tie' (without the 'optional' or 'preferred') is an imposition to many guests, and I think I would be rather taken aback to go to an affair where everyone was wearing tuxes and ballgowns and there was a DJ...JMHO.

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Can you please explain why that is? I don't understand the 'imposition'.

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Sure...it's just that writing 'black tie' instead of 'black tie optional' forces your male guests to rent a tux instead of wearing a dark suit that they already own. Unless an affair is somewhere incredibly ritzy, I don't see the need for it, but that is truly JMO. I don't like forcing people to have to get a tux.

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Posted by Jax430

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Posted by CubanBride

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Posted by Jax430
I feel that writing 'Black Tie' (without the 'optional' or 'preferred') is an imposition to many guests, and I think I would be rather taken aback to go to an affair where everyone was wearing tuxes and ballgowns and there was a DJ...JMHO.

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Can you please explain why that is? I don't understand the 'imposition'.

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Sure...it's just that writing 'black tie' instead of 'black tie optional' forces your male guests to rent a tux instead of wearing a dark suit that they already own. Unless an affair is somewhere incredibly ritzy, I don't see the need for it, but that is truly JMO. I don't like forcing people to have to get a tux.

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See, I don't think Black Tie means tuxedo. I will do some research.

EDIT: ok. so I did research and obviously Black Tie does mean tuxedos.. SO I was wrong. See, I can freely admit that. But I don't see how a DJ diminishes elegance. A DJ can play the same songs as a Band. If you eliminate the giveaways and silly stuff, a DJ can be just as elegant.

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Posted by CubanBride

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Posted by Jax430

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Posted by CubanBride

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Posted by Jax430
I feel that writing 'Black Tie' (without the 'optional' or 'preferred') is an imposition to many guests, and I think I would be rather taken aback to go to an affair where everyone was wearing tuxes and ballgowns and there was a DJ...JMHO.

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Can you please explain why that is? I don't understand the 'imposition'.

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Sure...it's just that writing 'black tie' instead of 'black tie optional' forces your male guests to rent a tux instead of wearing a dark suit that they already own. Unless an affair is somewhere incredibly ritzy, I don't see the need for it, but that is truly JMO. I don't like forcing people to have to get a tux.

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See, I don't think Black Tie means tuxedo. I will do some research.

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Let me know what you find out. If i'm wrong on that, I stand corrected

Whatever

What I would like to know is why I am the only one being attacked when there are OBVIOUSLY other women on here that feel the same way and why it has to be personal- it's just really ridiculous.

The question wasn't whether band is classy DJ isn't...

the question was- what do you expect when you see 'black tie'...

For those of you with DJs I'm sure your wedding is going to be fabulous, elegant and perfect. I didn't mean to offend anyone but have come to expect on this website that someone is ALWAYS going to be offended no matter what you say.

With that said, this is a WEBSITE and while it is a great community, to expect everyone to agree with you and blow smoke up your a55 is ridiculous and isn't going to EVER happen- so don't go crying or yelling because someone doesn't agree with you or doesn't think your choice is the best or whatever.. it's your wedding, it's your choices and they shouldn't have to be validated by someone else.

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Posted by Sassyz75

Whatever

What I would like to know is why I am the only one being attacked when there are OBVIOUSLY other women on here that feel the same way and why it has to be personal- it's just really ridiculous.

The question wasn't whether band is classy DJ isn't...

the question was- what do you expect when you see 'black tie'...

For those of you with DJs I'm sure your wedding is going to be fabulous, elegant and perfect. I didn't mean to offend anyone but have come to expect on this website that someone is ALWAYS going to be offended no matter what you say.

With that said, this is a WEBSITE and while it is a great community, to expect everyone to agree with you and blow smoke up your a55 is ridiculous and isn't going to EVER happen- so don't go crying or yelling because someone doesn't agree with you or doesn't think your choice is the best or whatever.. it's your wedding, it's your choices and they shouldn't have to be validated by someone else.

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Well said!

------------------------------------------------------Posted by Sassyz75

For me personally if I was wearing a ball gown and my husband was renting a tux (as he doesn't own one) i'd rather have a band and the type of elegance and formality it brings then a pasta course and a viennesse. To me, there is formality and elegance that live music brings that cannot be recreated by a DJ.
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For the record Sassybride, I was not attacking you, I just wanted to clear up the statement above.

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Posted by Sassyz75

For me personally if I was wearing a ball gown and my husband was renting a tux (as he doesn't own one) i'd rather have a band and the type of elegance and formality it brings then a pasta course and a viennesse. To me, there is formality and elegance that live music brings that cannot be recreated by a DJ.

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For the record Sassybride, I was not attacking you, I just wanted to clear up the statement above.