Do you ever wonder what possesses family members to say....(Last vent sorry)

Ok...called my church today - you can read the post on here...anyway my grandmother calls me tonight all worked up. So and So from the church comes up to me today and says you are getting married so I say 'really?' She tells me she doesn't know what to say - Well I didn't know you were getting married I must speak to your father about what I should say when people ask me that question (How about my granddaughter is getting married might be nice?). (I understand that since we only just picked a date that she might not realize that but I have been engaged for a few months now and Uh what did you think engaged meant?) UGH!!!!! - then I told her what happened at the church and she goes into details how to justify that it was fine that my step grandfather's (her husband) son who lives in Washington state could get married at the church (when he is not a member) but that it wasn't right that I could. UGH!! That is just the beggining. She goes on about how she converted to get married (which she didn't) and that he went to church when he was young (he is in his 40's and went there for about 5 years) I grew up in this church and was very active there for about 12 years.
Do family members take classes on how to say things that will offend/hurt/anger you?
Thank you all for letting me vent my frustrations

I hear you....when I showed my FMIL my invitations she told me that putting Adult reception was tacky.....HELLO I already did it no turning back now ,I have 100 of them!!!!! Sheesh!