Do you think it's wrong that..........

amstellitelady Posted: Apr 28, 2005 11:54 AM

Do you think it's wrong that..........

I'm getting married in a church when I'm not religious, I haven't gone to church in many many years and I haven't made confession since my confirmation or possibly even before that. I'm starting to think we shouldn't be married by the church and get married at the hall, but the problem with that is I don't think there is a spot for us to get married at the SMCC. I'm so confused

any words of wisdom would be helpful

Jen2999 Posted: Apr 28, 2005 11:57 AM

Re: Do you think it's wrong that..........

Im not religious either. Same situation as you.

The reason I decided church rather than hall is that even though Im not religious I still believe in God, maybe just not in all the 'religion' part of it and Id like to be blessed in that way. We arent having a mass, just the ceremony.

Preshy7 Posted: Apr 28, 2005 12:02 PM

Re: Do you think it's wrong that..........

im not a huge church person. i hardly attend even on huge holidays and havent been to confesion in ages.

however i do think god is present in our lives and by his graces he sent my fiance to me.

i hope that once fh and i live together, fh will force me to go as often as he does, because, after all, i plan to raise my children catholic and as a couple, we want to be good parents to our children and good role models.

so, if you are anything like myself, its is absolutely appropriate to get married in a church.

kissy27 Posted: Apr 28, 2005 12:06 PM

Re: Do you think it's wrong that..........

I am not religious either nor have I gone to confession...I still believe in God & feel you do not need to go to church to be a 'good Catholic' When we met with the deacon, he even told us that he was not a 'good practicing catholic' until after he was married & started to have children...I don't believe you need to be ashamed that you do not go to church or even second guess getting married in a church

beautyq115 Posted: Apr 28, 2005 12:09 PM

Re: Do you think it's wrong that..........

Well I only go to church on major holidays now and my FI doesn't really go at all. It was important for me to get married in a church because I really believe in the religious aspect of the wedding ceremony.

I don't think a person who goes to church every Sunday has any more of a right to get married in a church than someone who doesn't go to church.

cindyandkevin Posted: Apr 28, 2005 12:31 PM

Re: Do you think it's wrong that..........

I don't go to church anymore and we're getting married outside of the RH. I've never been to confession and my FI is divorced (he's not getting an anullment). However, we both believe in God and stand by the fact that he is everywhere. I don't think there's any need to attend weekly meetings or tell some strange man my secrets in order to be looked upon favorably in His eyes. We have both always led good lives and trust in our Lord's forgiveness when judgement day arrives. No human knows what lies on the other side, all we can do is try to do the right thing and hope for the best in the end. We are getting married on God's green earth, there's nothing more precious or natural than His own creation. Don't worry about that which you cannot control, just believe in your faith, whatever that may be.

PrincessConsuela Posted: Apr 28, 2005 12:33 PM

Re: Do you think it's wrong that..........

We decided to get married at the hall more for convince. I am happy with our choice I have been to church weddings and they are great.
We are having a reverend and we will be in god's presence maybe not in church per SE I will have some religious things we do in our ceremony.

When it came down to it this was the best thing for us to do. Especially when my mom said 'sure you don't have to get married in the church' that made our final decision.

I also wanted everyone to be there. If we had a church ceremony at 4 or 5 not everyone would be there. SO we are having our ceremony on Friday night at 7:30 which is perfect people donate have to take off from work to get ready for the wedding
OMG sorry SO long.

Blu-ize Posted: Apr 28, 2005 12:45 PM

Re: Do you think it's wrong that..........

We are not religious but we got married in a Conservative Temple. I wanted to be married in my faith even though I don't belong to a temple and don't attend regularly.

kase21 Posted: Apr 28, 2005 12:59 PM

Re: Do you think it's wrong that..........

Not at all.

My FH was never baptised, doesn't really believe and doesn't go to church.... ever.

I haven't been to church in forever, I was raised Catholic and have made all my sacraments, and honestly can't say I believe in the religion anymore....

With that being said, we're still doing the church thing. I know it's not the best reasoning, but it's what we are choosing to do, mainly for the family members that feel strongly about it taking place in the church. We have our own selfish reasons (pictures, separating the ceremony and reception).

At the end of the day, it may renew faith or just make some people in my life happy.. .either way I'm ok with it.

sarahthegreat Posted: Apr 28, 2005 12:59 PM

Re: Do you think it's wrong that..........

if you really don't feel right about getting married in a church, smcc does offer a site to have the ceremony. i know of at least one bride on here who did that. and i'm with you, i've been to church 2x in the last 3 years, both for funerals. the church does not just marry the most devout, that was the case, none of us be getting married. don't stress on it, if you want to have the ceremony at smcc go for it!

Goldi1021 Posted: Apr 28, 2005 01:01 PM

Re: Do you think it's wrong that..........

No. You don't have to be religious to believe in G-d.

soontobemrsv Posted: Apr 28, 2005 01:11 PM

Re: Do you think it's wrong that..........

my whole family is religious, but i have not been too good with going to chiurch , i think once i was about 18 and old enough to make my own decision, i stoped going, of course i still h ave god in my life, my fh is not religious at all, but ive always wanted an outside wedding by a gazebo on the water, so the idea of a church was out, but if i didnt want it outside, i'd have it in a church. i dont think it matters where you get married, just that you love each other is enough, and god knows that.

amstellitelady Posted: Apr 28, 2005 01:44 PM

Re: Do you think it's wrong that..........

wow, you all made me feel a ton better. I'm sticking with the church.

thanks ladies

conigs25 Posted: Apr 28, 2005 02:35 PM

Re: Do you think it's wrong that..........

Hmmm... this is a toughie. It is such a personal decision. Personally, my FI and I had the same issues and have decided to not get married in a church bc we dont practice on a regular basis so....

CC59 Posted: Apr 28, 2005 05:38 PM

Re: Do you think it's wrong that..........

you do what YOU feel is right. Where do you see yourself getting married?

AlliNMatt06 Posted: Apr 28, 2005 06:11 PM

Re: Do you think it's wrong that..........

Nor me or Fh are religious but, I think my parents and his parents would of been upset if we didn't get married in a church.
My mother is having a hard enough time excepting that I am getting married in a Lutheran church and not Catholic.

SIBride06 Posted: Apr 28, 2005 06:22 PM

Re: Do you think it's wrong that..........

Posted by Preshy7

im not a huge church person. i hardly attend even on huge holidays and havent been to confesion in ages.

however i do think god is present in our lives and by his graces he sent my fiance to me.

i hope that once fh and i live together, fh will force me to go as often as he does, because, after all, i plan to raise my children catholic and as a couple, we want to be good parents to our children and good role models.

so, if you are anything like myself, its is absolutely appropriate to get married in a church.

Well said!! I totally agree by all means!

06NovBride Posted: Apr 28, 2005 07:18 PM

Re: Do you think it's wrong that..........

I am in the same situation. I am not religious but I do believe in God.

My FI has not been to church since his confirmation and does not want to get married in the church. I thought we were going to have a problem with his mom and my dad because both are religious, but they understood.

So we decided to get married at the hall.

VogueBride Posted: Apr 28, 2005 09:41 PM

Re: Do you think it's wrong that..........

im kinda in the same boat...but i couldnt see getting married any other way....just b/c im not always practicing, doesnt mean im any less catholic

iffer042373 Posted: Apr 29, 2005 04:35 PM

Re: Do you think it's wrong that..........

I'm n ot religeous either I only attend church when I have to wedings funerals christenings communions etc....

I always wanted the church wedding I didn't want to do the ceremony at the hall even though alot of the places had really nice atmosphere but I always wanted the church.