Do you think there is really a 'biological clock'???

This all thing is kinda unsettling

Berlkim: Hi I feel the same way. The Oprah show last night really scared the s*hit out of me. My worst fear has also been not being able to have children. And like you, I didn't want to hear it, but I know that it's very important for women to know about their bodies and be able to make an informed decision.
I have a plan of when I want to have children. I'm 23 right now, will get married when I'm 25 and want to start trying to have children around 27-28. I want to have a house and stabilize my career first. But like everyone knows plans don't always work out they way you want. So that scares me even more. What if we're not making enough money? What if we're not ready? I feel like I don't have a choice because if I wait it might be too late!! I'm in law school right now and will graduate next May and will be working about 4 years before we try to conceive. But you never know what's going to happen. What if my job isn't stable or I'm not making enough money?
I spoke to my FH last night about the show and he said 'babe don't worry, we're going to have kids sooner than later' But how does he know that we'll be financially stable? Maybe I'm worrying for nothing, maybe everything will work out in the end. I'm sorry to ramble, but last night's show really freaked me out and made me start thinking. Thanks for listening!

Marcela and others

I really don't think anyone is ever completely 'ready' to have a baby. Whether it's financially (owning a home, etc.), physically, or emotionally. I mean the thought of being responsible for another human being is scary, but I do feel I am ready to be a mother. People all over the world have babies all the time, in various circumstances. I know it's different for us being from Long Island. I look at it this way: just because I grew up in the suburbs in a big house w/ a big backyard, doesn't mean that my fi and I cannot live in a 2 BR apt in the city for a few more years, even if we have a baby. I've realized that you can't expect to have it all at the same time. I mean it would be nice to have the ideal successful career that will suport motherhood and a nice house but not everyone can have it all at once. One of the woman on Oprah last night (and Oprah herself) said this same thing. There was a Harvard graduate who decided to raise her kids in her 20s and 30s and is going back to her career in her 40s. Just my 2 cents again!

Marcela

Don't let all this ridiculousness get to you. Yup, I think it is ridiculous. So what if fertility starts to slow down at 27. Its not like its stopping and there is no reason for any of us to think that if we don't have babies in our twenties, we wont have babies at all. Obviously we all know that we shouldn't wait until our 40s to first start trying, but beyond that I think the media is creating an unnecessary frenzy over the whole issue. All of this madness will only lead to women having babies before they are ready. Don't buy in!

You should focus on your finals right now and leave this for another time. Con Law, Evidence and Corporations, oh my! After that, everything else will be cake!

Becky

Nina

I didn't watch Oprah, but its dangerous to say that women can't have it all. Every makes a choice regarding what is important to them. I think its great that you are ready to start a family now, but please don't tell me that I can't have a career and a family. Just becuase Oprah and some Oprah guest think so, doesn't make it true. In twenty years, I'll come back and show them!

YOU GO, BECKY! :-)) NM** *NM*

Becky

Good for you, that is how women should be thinking. Sorry if I offended you, I didn't mean to sound like women CANNOT have it all, but what I realized is that these women (on the show) set themselves up for disappointment, b/c of lack of education about waiting to have children. Personally, I didn't go to school for 7 years to not have a career, so I would never tell anyone that they cannot have a career and children. I was just saying that the high expectations can also be dangerous.

Nina: Thanks for your advice! *NM*

Becky...Thank you

Becky: Thanks for the support. I know I shouldn't be worried about this stuff now! I'm going crazy with property, admin. law and UCC. I'm ready to burst! I can't wait for this semester to be over.
When I brought this up, I in no way meant that I wanted to give up my career. I've worked too hard and come to far to give it up. Even though I know it will be hard, I full intend to continue working after I have children. My mom (got her PHd last year) and bosses did it, so why can't I?.
Thanks again for yor support!

Nina, I'm not offended, sorry if I came on a little strong. *NM*

Marcela, I feel your pain! Still have Property nightmares. *NM*

Becky HAHAHAHAHAHA!

It will all be over on May 20th, then I start summer school on June 3rd. But it's only 2 nights a week and will lighten my work load for my last semester. I can't believe I only have one year left. It went by soo fast!

Marcela, where do you go? *NM*

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Sheppy, Congrats! You must be so excited. : - ) *NM*

Sheppy Congrats!! I can't wait for my day to come :) *NM*

Becky

Hi: I go to CUNY School of Law. I originally wanted to go somewhere else, but could not afford it. I like the school, but I definitely won't make as much money coming directly out of law school than someone graduating from Columbia will because it's a public interest school. Where did you go? Where do you work now?

I graduate law school in 2 days! Yeah!

WOW, you graduate early....
where do you go to school... I graduate on may 26 from law school, and that is why I have not been on the boards lately, been bombarded and trying to do mbe questions.

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Marcela, my college roommate went there!

I went to the University of Maryland. Actually, I went to Touro (in Huntington) for my first year and then transferred.

I wouldn't worry about the Columbia grads. Its all a big trade off. I work at a pretty small firm. A bunch of my law school pals work at the big downtown Baltimore firms and make mad cash, but they work crazy hours. I don't make nearly as much money as they do, but all of my coworkers are laid back, family oriented and very nice. Instead of looking at eight or nine years before being made partner, I can do it here in like three. And the best part is - I still have a life!

So don't worry about those other bigtime law schools and the big money jobs. Over the long haul, you'll do fine. And being an attorney is something I really appreciate during these times, because the economy does not seem to affect people's desire to sue each other! On the other hand, its Sat morning, and I am sitting at my desk writing this from the office....

Becky

Becky

I know what you mean about the big law firms. I don't want to work 24/7 either. I want a life!!
I work in a law firm now that does mostly family law (mostly divorces) and they are laid back and very family oriented. The partners are 3 women and all have children. I've worked there since college.
My ideal would be to work at the DA's office for the first few years, gain in court experience and then transfer into a small-medium private firm. But this won't happen if the economy doesn't get any better. Alot of the 3Ls this year didn't get any job offers because of the bad economy. I hope things are better when I graduate!