We have been married for 2 1/2 months and we hardly see each other. DH works during the day and has class at night. I work at night and some weekends. I knew that we were going to see less of each other when school started, but sometimes it is 3 days before we see each other where one of us is not asleep. It just makes me sad. I was just wanting to know if there are others out there with the same issue and how you deal with it.
xjulietx
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Re: Does anyone else hardly see their DH/FH?
When we came back from the honeymoon, DH had to hit the ground running at work. Those first two weeks he was getting home at 10PM most nights and we staying in my parents' basement (we just moved into our condo last week). I was very sad about the situation, but my dad told me I should be happy to have a hard working husband and soon we would see each other more.
I suggest planning dates for nights when you know you both will be around and awake. Schedules are tough but the payoff will be great when he finishes school!
Robeymuse
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Re: Does anyone else hardly see their DH/FH?
Me Me! DH just left yesterday for a 10 day business trip. He has been gone for a week every month since we have been married. I am allowed to go with him but I can never get the time off of work. He also works as a firefighter and works 24 hour shifts 10 days a month at the firehouse. I see him maybe 2 nights a week and one day on the weekend. We came from a long distance realtionship so I guess I am used to not seeing him as much
kissy27
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Re: Does anyone else hardly see their DH/FH?
FH works long days & in NYC. He is so hardworking, so I can't complain. It does it so we can have everything we have...I see him only Saturday & Sunday....I think it will be better once we are married bc at least he will be home at night (even if I don't see him) Right now we both still live home & we are about 10 miles from each other. You just have to grin & bear it
bobbsbride
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Re: Does anyone else hardly see their DH/FH?
I have been married 1 1/2 months and I hardly ever see him!! He is an assurance accountant! For the last three weeks he has been working like crazy. He goes in at 8am and the earliest he has been home is 1am. The latest has been 3:30am (on our 1 month anniversary!). I am so lonely its not funny! I am just happy that we both took 3 weeks off after the wedding to be with eachother! ' ETS: He works Saturday and Sunday also the same hours!!
brooklynbridezilla
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Re: Does anyone else hardly see their DH/FH?
I will be in that boat soon! Fh is going back to school this semester. He working 8:30 to 5:30 monday to friday, and go to school 6-10 monday to thursday. We will have friday evening and the weekend. Maybe it will be a little easier since we live together.
Me too. FH is a nyc cop and he works such crazy hours, I never see him and since he is in transit, I cant even call him b/c he cant get a signal in the subway. I guess what I do to deal is make the most of his days off and I watch scary movies. I figure if I feel scared than I dont feel lonely. It doesnt always work though.
heidla
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Re: Does anyone else hardly see their DH/FH?
Thank you for letting me know that I am not alone in my loneliness.
brooklynbridezilla
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Re: Does anyone else hardly see their DH/FH?
Diamongrlie I love scary movies in general. Have you seen The Ring and 28 Days Later?
I'm sure I will be on LIW a LOT more after FH starts school. Especially since the rest of teh wedding planning will fall to me, since he will be so busy. But i am glad I have you girls to share it with!
Ladybug63
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Re: Does anyone else hardly see their DH/FH?
Me too! FI is a cop and he works from 7pm to 5am or later every 4 days. He gets 4 days inbetween shifts but with overtime he is only home maybe 2 of the 4. The only time I see him is when I wake up to go to work and hes sleeping. By the time I get home hes gone already. I'm used to it. It gives us a chance to miss eachother and not take eachother for granted.
As bad as that is we have 2 friends one has 2 young kids the other is 4 months pregnant and both there DH's were called to duty in Iraq.
OctBride05
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Re: Does anyone else hardly see their DH/FH?
me my fh works 6 days a week from 7:30 in the morning til 9:00 at night. when he gets home all he does is eat, take a shower and does a little work on the computer, then we'll put on a movie and he falls right to sleep. the only day i get to see him is sunday and once in a while monday. i get so angry at him sometimes. i know he is a hard worker, but it makes me upset to hardly ever see him.
Corduroy94
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Re: Does anyone else hardly see their DH/FH?
Me too! My FI works as a medic from 11pm -7am M-F. When he gets home I've left for work & when I get home he's awake for 3 hrs. before he showers and leaves. Then on weekends he works day &/or night shifts & always has at least 2-3 doubles during the week...if I'm lucky I see him 3 days a week and its usually only for a few hours.
Lets see...he left for work Wed. night & won't be home when I am till Sat evening...this is killer
mikeysgirl
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Re: Does anyone else hardly see their DH/FH?
Me too!!! FH is in NYPD and I have not ssen him sine he graduated form the academy. He had a day off yesterday and we did wedding thngs all day!!! What fun
Thats so terrible that you wont see him for that long I am so sorry!!!
FH is on NYPD so like the other guys he works reduculous hours, never has weekends and even works on his day off. We were a long distance relationship for 2 years so being used to it does make it easier but I think about later on with kids and stuff. If they work like this what do we do?
FI is also an inactive MARINE so there is always that possibility that he could get called back. I dont know what I would do then!
Donna
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Re: Does anyone else hardly see their DH/FH?
to all of us.
My DH works 5-6 days a week, he doesn't get home at night until about midnight (and I'm usually sleeping). And when I'm leaving in morning to go to work (around 8am) he's sleeping.
Blu-ize
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Re: Does anyone else hardly see their DH/FH?
Posted by lilqtny
He is in Iraq with the USMC so I won't see him for nine months to a year :(
Just after I start feeling sorry for myself that we work 2 jobs each and never see each other, I realize how lucky I am. I hope your honey is safe and comes home soon.
mnttnbchbride
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Re: Does anyone else hardly see their DH/FH?
me too. FH works in Baseball, so he's always at the stadium from 9am to midnight every night that the team is in town. He has no concept of Sat or Sun. He's also on the road with them a lot.
He's done this for a while, so while it gets easier to not have him around, I'm still not really 'used' to it.
My only advice would be to make sure that you TALK when one of you is feeling lonely. From personal experience, I can tell you that it's better not to sulk, but to tell the other person that you need to see each other more.
Also, try to make the most out of the time you have together. PLAN date nights, don't just LET them happen. Those can come too, but it's nice to have something to look forward too.
Oh, and try to keep yourself busy. Not having him around forces me to go out and be more independent. Seeing my friends, taking a class, etc...
It looks like a lot of us are in the same boat. It's nice to have company, but I think we'd all like to see them more.
JP&EP
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Re: Does anyone else hardly see their DH/FH?
My FH is currently under water since last month (Navy - Submarine). He's due back late October only to leave again in January to the Middle East for 6 months.
The Original 2nd-time-around
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Re: Does anyone else hardly see their DH/FH?
My DH has been putting in some CRAAZY hours the past month. He's in the restaurant business, so he always works strange hours, but it's never been this bad. Last night he got home at 8 and it was such a big deal. Usually it's more like 11 or 12
