they will have no $$ after the wedding?? i mean yeah we have savings for the wedding, but after that its' gone.....then i have no freaking idea how we are ever gonna afford a home!!....FI seriously needs to get another IT job that pays him MORE $$! and he knows he can but i feel that he's not seriously looking....I make a bit more than he does...and i feel that i'm the one who has to support and save and struggle!!!....anyone else feel this way?????.......Sorry for Venting!.....had to get it out!
snydl40
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Re: does anyone ever feel that.....
We have our $ all over the place-two savings accounts, a checking account, an ING account, a wedding fund, and then a house fund, then we have $ in the stock market. We have been saving like crazy and although it is hard we have made some good $ placement. I would look into getting an ING account because the interest you get on your $ is something like 5%-a lot more than at the bank. Yes it is frustrating though.
XFINALLYX
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Re: does anyone ever feel that.....
how about im getting married next september and havent saved a dime for the wedding? we cant afford to save money right now cause i was unemployed for 3 months and im making virtually no money right now (its slow season at disney) and we just moved so now we have all of those expenses. im so stressed out i cry all of the time. we just pushed the wedding back too it was supposed to be june 7th which is our anniversary and the day he proposed so im really upset im losing that day. *sigh* sorry to vent on your post. i feel your pain though
thelastresort
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Re: does anyone ever feel that.....
I totally know how you feel...FH got a new job and took a substantial pay cut so I'm the main bread winner. It's annoying. I feel like my parents and I, not we, are paying for the wedding. I work my *** off and I can't say that FH doesn't but it's just annoying. Thanks for giving me the opportunity to vent as well!
ejm1219
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Re: does anyone ever feel that.....
I hear ya. I definately make more money than fh and I work two jobs. FH doesn't work as hard b/c he has a savings from when his father passed away. We don't want to use that for the wedding which is why Im working my toushie off! It is so frustrating!
JennyAl
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Re: does anyone ever feel that.....
i'm glad that i could provide a small venting platform for you ladies today
IT IS REALLY frustrating...sometimes i feel like my FI will just depend on me for $$, i have $ saved up since i was young, and i dont want to use that $$ for our wedding, i want to ONLY use it in case of emergency....wedding and a house in not an emergency....
but oh well...love is love.....if you really love someone....blah blah blah
luvabul
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Re: does anyone ever feel that.....
vent all u want, thats how i feel too....my parents are paying for a lot of it too, and i feel like everything adding up to sooo much =( i have almost 310-320 guest invited...hoping not all show up lol
jax1023
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Re: does anyone ever feel that.....
I know how you feel also. My FH is a grad student and gets paid a small stiped. I make about 4 times what he does. It often annoys me thay I'M the one paying for all of this. And that its blowing all my savings.
Oh well, I;m hoping to get some of it back in present $$.
NY031978
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Re: does anyone ever feel that.....
i know how you feel.....i feel like we live by a calender...i look and cant wait till the 15th and 30th of the month.......its pay day!! i hate it!! Esp being its Alexs pay day....i dont even work (im at home w/ our daughter) i really feel like i need a PT job just too help out! its 1 sucky feeling. Now the wedding is 4 months away and i feel HORRIBLE going to him alwayys w. my hand out. Part of me wishes i never had this $$$ wedding! (and its not even $$$ compared to some ppl out there....soooo sad!!!)
SillyBeans
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Re: does anyone ever feel that.....
I feel like many guys these days don't have that strive to support their families (be main bread winners) . I think they let a lot of the financial burden fall on the women. JMHO
If I were you , I would not touch your money you saved since you were young. If it comes down to it, tell him you'll both need to take a loan out because you won't spend your money for the wedding. Maybe that will get him moving
JenMike331
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Re: does anyone ever feel that.....
i totally feel that way all the time....i have nothing on my side saved at all!.... im living paycheck to paycheck to pay for all the wedding stuff purchased a credit card, the furniture purchased on a credit card and the honeymoon on a credit card and i make crap money so i cant save anything from my checks....its like i work to pay my credit cards! my fh works two jobs one job all the money goes to the 'wedding fund' and his other is how he pays his bills....but i sooooooooo fear that once everything is paid for we're gonna have nothing to show for it.....SCARY!
JennyAl
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Re: does anyone ever feel that.....
Posted by luvabul
vent all u want, thats how i feel too....my parents are paying for a lot of it too, and i feel like everything adding up to sooo much =( i have almost 310-320 guest invited...hoping not all show up lol
WHOA 300....hopefully, the '30% dont show up' rule will apply to you!...at least ur parents are paying for alot of it...i've never up front ask my parents for $$, i think they like to see me struggle!
JennyAl
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Re: does anyone ever feel that.....
Posted by NY031978
i know how you feel.....i feel like we live by a calender...i look and cant wait till the 15th and 30th of the month.......its pay day!! i hate it!! Esp being its Alexs pay day....i dont even work (im at home w/ our daughter) i really feel like i need a PT job just too help out! its 1 sucky feeling. Now the wedding is 4 months away and i feel HORRIBLE going to him alwayys w. my hand out. Part of me wishes i never had this $$$ wedding! (and its not even $$$ compared to some ppl out there....soooo sad!!!)
i know me too!....i look at my savings acct and just wait fro ti to go up 2x a month! so sad!
i know the $$ some people have...god bless them...i wish i was as lucky as them!
lipglossjunky73
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Re: does anyone ever feel that.....
Dont worry - you will be ok - we have no money, and we rent our home, plain and simple. DH is 42, divorced with 2 kids. He had a good job but lost it before the wedding, and lo and behold, 2 months after the wedding and I'm pregnant. we need to find a new home to rent, and he's still looking for a job - believe it or not, somehow we are still getting by... Buying a home is tough and not possible for everyone - you'll get there when you get there - trust me - you dont need to own a home to have kids!
JennyAl
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Re: does anyone ever feel that.....
awww....thanks for the encouragement....and congrats to you on the baby....
i saw a new mommy and her baby at church today, and i was like DAMN....that's gonna be me..... .....its funny how life changes! ina good way of course!
lipglossjunky73
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Re: does anyone ever feel that.....
Posted by JennyAl
awww....thanks for the encouragement....and congrats to you on the baby....
i saw a new mommy and her baby at church today, and i was like DAMN....that's gonna be me..... .....its funny how life changes! ina good way of course!
Thanks... everything has a way of working out!
Meaghan729
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Re: does anyone ever feel that.....
of course!
I just went to open houses today - i cant believe the amount of $$ people ask for their homes that are
its so hard when you are starting out, especially on LI!
but we'll all get through it!
kitty1224
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Re: does anyone ever feel that.....
We are scraping together to pay for the wedding. I feel like I am always $200 dollars short. Paying all the bills and saving to pay the hall and etc. I mean it is ridiculous. I can not even afford to buy my books for school this week, because have to sent check for hall. You are definitely not alone. Hopefully we make it all back.
October Bliss
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Re: does anyone ever feel that.....
I worry about that all the time, but then I realize when we started planning this wedding we had no $$. But, we wanted a wedding, so we figured out the costs, set a budget and a specific amount to go into savings every paycheck and stuck with it. In a few short weeks we will have our wedding and it will be paid for.
Same thing with a house. A downpayment will be double what the wedding cost, so it will take two years to save, but we have already done it, so I know it can be done again.
ayadali
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Re: does anyone ever feel that.....
I feel the same way - I went through a good portion of my savings for the wedding and DH couldn't really help. I also make more than him by a lot. I keep telling him that this is all temporary and he NEEDS to get a new job. The 'macho' in him feels the same way, so I know he will eventually get a new job. For now, we are cutting a lot of corners so that I can continue to save.
It's tough but hopefully it's temporary and your FI will get a better job to help you save for a home.
