Does anyone feel this way?(long)

I am getting married in Aug. FH and I agreed that we were going to keep the wedding under 20,000.00. If we go a little over it is fine. Now I have a friend (If that's what u want to call her) she is getting married in July and is spending ALLLL this money it should be upwards of 35,000. That would be fine IF you were already established or are having your family donate a good portion but they are not. I was speaking to MOH about it and I felt that I was staying on track, by looking for all the good deals. I even found my WD for 540.00 tax included and it is a spring 04 dress which isn't even out yet. MOH says that she doesn't know why I am spending soo much money on certain things like vid & photog which came up to 3195 it includes dvd, vhs , 3 albums and proofs etc. Her response is that it is rediculous. I feel that I work VERY hard and I deserve certain things I am not as bad as my friend so why is it she is making me feel that everything we want to do is a WASTE of time and MONEY. When she does that it really brings me down and then I start second guessing myself. HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Well, first of all, I would stop asking for the opinion of your MOH. It seems like you need validation of your feelings and you are feeling like you need to justify your decisions, but you don't! What is important to one person may be meaningless to another. You are entitled to that. Now, if it were FH who felt the way your MOH was feeling, I would reconsider, but maybe she thinks she is helping you by telling you you can save more money by cutting the cost of video, etc. Don't worry, you have a budget that you are sticking to, and I think you should be proud of that!

Don't let anyone tell you what you should or should not be doing. Everyone does this wedding thing in his/her OWN way. 3195 for photos/video is not alot of money for the two most important things that will be used that day!!

On the same token, if your friends are spending 35K, (which isn't alot in today's NY wedding market believe it or not) it's also their discretion. No one can comment on how they are spending their money, just as no one should comment how you are spending your money.

Just tell this 'friend' to keep her mouth shut and enjoy your wedding without the peanut gallery comments!

Don't stress it, AUG21-04. The price you got for photo & etc is not bad, considering what it includes. Plus that's the one thing I feel you shouldn't skimp on. You will show those to children and grandchildren for years to come. You want those memories to be the best. Save where you can, and don't try to compete. This is YOUR wedding, not the 35,000 girl's wedding.

My friends and I are a little different... we all 'brag' about how much we save, and not just for our weddings. We love showing off our Payless shoes, and $10 Store shirts and stuff. If you can have an equally fabulous wedding, or better even, without spending as much as someone else, you have that much more to put towards your new home or something else.

The important thing is that at the end of the day, you will be married to your wonderful man, no matter how much or how little you spend.

Honey don't let people stress u out about YOUR day. In the end u don't want to have any regrets or I wish I hads. U plan it your way and if people aren't supportive then move on. I don't think people are truly awareof how mucha wedding costs. Besides if u are going to splurge on something, your photos and video are your best bet.

I am going to go out on a limb and say that your MOH has not put a wedding together. Before we started to meet with vendors and do some research I had no idea how much a wedding would cost.

Try not to let her get to you and don't tell her how much you are spending on the wedding, it's none of her business anyway.

THANKS