Dress Woes

Yesterday I had a melt down, and just wanted to vent about it.

I got my gown about a week and a half ago. It was four months early, and I was amazed at how quickly the seamstress must have made it. I went the skip the boutique route to save money since I'm a major budget-bride; this was a hint I picked up from the book Bridal Bargains, which has been really helpful so far. I hired a seamstress in China directly. His reviews were amazing, so I was completely confident it would be great; and it was a custom gown, so that was great, considering I have a particularly small bust and am tall and a thin waist, a weird runner's body that calls for custom tailoring.

My initial reaction to it, though, was that it looked different than in the pictures, and I had to have my friend continually convince me I looked great in it. I had issues with it; the detailing had ugly sequins instead of just beads like in the picture, and there was netting on the appliques that were really poorly trimmed from the gown. And you could see the stitching on the bodice, even in pictures, not just up close. But I thought maybe I was just having a weird stress overreaction, and that the dress was indeed beautiful and my anxiety over it would pass and I'd fall more in love with it over time and after many alterations.

Well, my veil arrived two days ago and yesterday I tried on the veil with the gown, and was struck by this simple fact: I like my veil more than my gown.

And then I had a complete melt down.

I thought I was done with the dress part of the checklist. I absolutely hate that I'm heading to a boutique this afternoon. And without the dress, which is kind of the cornerstone of the wedding in a way, I just can't even think straight about the wedding, the DIY save the dates, registering gifts, all the other little things...

I'm trying to convince myself everything isn't falling apart. I'm overreacting, right?

Anyway, just wanted to send my stress out into the void...

I am sorry!!

Is there someway the dress can be fixed into something you would be more happy with by another seamstress? Might be cheaper than buying a brand new dress.

Look on the bright side.. at least it came really early so now you have more time to look around and find something else that you can still fit in your budget.

---

Posted by gporka23

I am sorry!!

Is there someway the dress can be fixed into something you would be more happy with by another seamstress? Might be cheaper than buying a brand new dress.

Look on the bright side.. at least it came really early so now you have more time to look around and find something else that you can still fit in your budget.

---

Totally agree with you......I am so sorry that you have to stress about this! Let us know how you make out today!!!

first: BREATHE! 'everything' is NOT falling a part...

i will say this; ur dress is probably YOUR most important part of the day...you want to feel the most beautiful you've ever felt in ur life and rightfully so. My advice? listen to YOUR heart..not everyone else that's telling you 'dont worry u look great'..maybe u do - who knows - but if YOU don't FEEL great, well that's what matters. I know u're on a budget and u're probably hating the fact that u're going to spend money on another gown - but i think u'll be a lot more upset & filled with regret if u keep a dress that you're entirely unhappy with. You have PLENTY of time untill your wedding, and there are a number of boutiques that have reasonable pricing. To me, if you're going to spend money on anything, this is it. Fantasia Bridal in Rocky Point is fantastic...the staff is wonderful, the seamstresses are amazing(renound on the island!) and they have a whole SLEW of gowns to chose from..not to mention they price match so if u find ur dress cheaper elsewhere, they'll beat the price i'd also consider David's Bridal...i have a lot of friends that have gone through them and were so happy with their turnout. Also look into sample sales and even Estelle's (rt.110 in huntington)...even if u get it through any of those last few i mentioned - Fantasia does outside alterations. I hope this all works out for u & that u're happy in the end! but don't let this little thing rob your joy...take a breath, and go find the dress of your dreams

I'm so sorry you are going through this. But sometimes, we can't plan for every contingency, and even the best intentions fall flat.

You've got time still, and you still have ways to save money on your dress. Find something you like and then see if you can get it cheaply through some sources. I ordered my dress through Burton's in Huntington Station. I saved close to $500 with them over what other salons had it for. I ordered my BM dresses through Netbride.com; we saved more than $40 per dress. Another great place to order gowns from (with discounts) is Pearl's Place in NOLA. They can discount gowns b/c of the volume.

And certainly there are places right in NYC that are great on price and where you can buy samples at deep discounts. RK Bridal is the big one.

GL! It's all going to be fine and will work out!

First of all... I'm so sorry to hear that you're having this trouble!! I bought that book too and I love it...there's some great tips in there!! I was actually contemplating doing the same thing with the dress. I would say that you should definitely try to bring it to a seamstress here and see if they can modify it a bit for you...that would probably definitely cost less than having a whole new dress. Things will work out, I'm sure they will!! but I totally understand what you're saying about not being able to concentrate on anything else...I'm having a situation wtih the dress right now too, so I feel your pain!! Everything will work out, but try to take it to a tailor and see what they can do for you!! And maybe the boutique thing isn't a bad idea to try on some gowns and see what it is that you really like. Then you can transfer that to the tailor to change the gown to how you want it. good luck, and keep us updated!!

PS, can we see pics??? Maybe we can help!!

---

Posted by mandab

PS, can we see pics??? Maybe we can help!!

---

That's a good idea; I'm writing from work, but I could post one when I get home.

For now, I'm off to RK Bridal (I live in Manhattan, so the Long Island shops are kind of a trek for me).

---

Posted by melodicharmony

---

Posted by mandab

PS, can we see pics??? Maybe we can help!!

---

That's a good idea; I'm writing from work, but I could post one when I get home.

For now, I'm off to RK Bridal (I live in Manhattan, so the Long Island shops are kind of a trek for me).

---

aaah wasn't aware u were in manhattan - i'm actually in queens! well RK is sure to be a huge help! they have an endless selection and pretty great prices too...good luck!

I'm sorry to hear about that
At least you got it now and not just a few weeks before the wedding. Cheer up, you still got time. I know it ***** that you will have to go out and spend money again on another dress but at least you have time to resolve the crisis at hand.
Good luck!!

Rather than a new post, thought I might continue the story here with new questions...

I went to RK Bridal and two other places since my discovery that I don't like my dress. And I found that I really love Maggie Sottero. I had been avoiding her because Bridal Bargains rated the company a D but that was prob. because the shipping takes so long.

My MUSTS for the gown have always been: corset back, strapless or off the shoulder, no cleavage, chapel length, minimal to no bead work, no lace, no sheath.

I tried on this gown that I absolutely love, it's fabric detailing and overall design took my breath away-- but I'm worried because both places had a size 10 or 12 available to try on and I'm a size 6, maybe even a 4. It has a dropped waist so I looked enormous in it.

Is a dropped waist appropriate for tall, fairly large hipped, but very small waisted figures? I just can't tell in a size 12- it looked like a hot dog. A lot of websites said it is a good dress for fuller figured women, so I don't know whether that means its not a good option for me. Just curious for opinions on the dropped waist silhouette- I would have NEVER, EVER thought I would end up going that route, but this dress is amazing. I'm definitely still going to try to find a place that has *any* drop waist gown in a 6 to see whether or not this actually works with my body.

Oh, and I have no idea how to add pictures , otherwise I'd add a picture of my mishap gown that I dislike more every time I try on another!

---

Posted by melodicharmony

Rather than a new post, thought I might continue the story here with new questions...

I went to RK Bridal and two other places since my discovery that I don't like my dress. And I found that I really love Maggie Sottero. I had been avoiding her because Bridal Bargains rated the company a D but that was prob. because the shipping takes so long.

My MUSTS for the gown have always been: corset back, strapless or off the shoulder, no cleavage, chapel length, minimal to no bead work, no lace, no sheath.

I tried on this gown that I absolutely love, it's fabric detailing and overall design took my breath away-- but I'm worried because both places had a size 10 or 12 available to try on and I'm a size 6, maybe even a 4. It has a dropped waist so I looked enormous in it.

Is a dropped waist appropriate for tall, fairly large hipped, but very small waisted figures? I just can't tell in a size 12- it looked like a hot dog. A lot of websites said it is a good dress for fuller figured women, so I don't know whether that means its not a good option for me. Just curious for opinions on the dropped waist silhouette- I would have NEVER, EVER thought I would end up going that route, but this dress is amazing. I'm definitely still going to try to find a place that has *any* drop waist gown in a 6 to see whether or not this actually works with my body.

Oh, and I have no idea how to add pictures , otherwise I'd add a picture of my mishap gown that I dislike more every time I try on another!

---

aww dont worry hun...maggie sottero is a GREAT company. which dress did you like? I would love to see it! I think drop waist dresses are great for tall girls! im a shrimp and they looked silly on me!

i think dropped waist dresses can look stunning on a tall thin girl. I am short and have a dropped waist gown (pics in my album) ..but the skirt is full.. so it makes me look longer which i love..but i've seen the same dress on taller girls and it looks fab!!!!! Do some searching for dropped waist gowns and maybe call a few places to see what sample sizes they carry.

my dress was big when i tried it on.. but i still knew it was the one..clamped in the back and everything!!! you'll find the perfect dress!! try not to stress out too much

If you can recoup any $$ from your dress, I'd try.... I'm guessing a custom dress is non-refundable. But the good news is YES, you have plenty of time to find the right dress.... also check out bridepower.com for famous makers for less.