Etiquette re: your inlaws coming to your sibling's wedding

debismom Posted: Nov 08, 2008 12:08 AM

Etiquette re: your inlaws coming to your sibling's wedding

Debi had wondered if Donna planned to invite Fred's Parents to the Wedding. I didn't think that was the custom, because Donna hardly knows Fred's Parents. But, now I kinda feel stupid, because Fred's Parents sent Donna and Josh an e-gift, which was really nice of them!! So, Donna is inviting them to the Wedding. What did you gals do in similar situations? If your sibling is getting married, are they/did they invite your inlaws? Mary MOB

And PS Should I invite Fred's Mom to the Shower?

jeffamanda080808 Posted: Nov 08, 2008 12:11 AM

Re: Etiquette re: your inlaws coming to your sibling's wedding

Wow that is tough Mary. When my sister gets married...I wouldn't expect her to invite DH's parents. Even if they sent an e-gift. She should send a really nice personal thank you card though. Depending on her guest list and minimums...maybe they could be B-List? Who would they sit with? In all it depends on Donna. She should probably talk to Debi about it. And as for the shower...it all depends on the type of shower. Would you do family and close friends? Or all women invited to the wedding?

wundmoretime Posted: Nov 08, 2008 12:15 AM

Re: Etiquette re: your inlaws coming to your sibling's wedding

It really depends on the relationship. We do a lot with my DH's sister-n-law's family. They were all invited to our wedding; brothers, sisters and mom. We were invited to the other brother's girlfriend's mom's 70th bday, but we didn't go cause it was my daughter's bday party that day. We invited all the brother's partners parents to the wedding, but only the one came out of the 3. My sister's husband's family is gigantic, so we don't generally get involved, they are already a large bunch without adding more. My brother is not in a serious relationship.

debismom Posted: Nov 08, 2008 12:21 AM

Re: Etiquette re: your inlaws coming to your sibling's wedding

Posted by jeffamanda080808

Wow that is tough Mary. When my sister gets married...I wouldn't expect her to invite DH's parents. Even if they sent an e-gift. She should send a really nice personal thank you card though. Depending on her guest list and minimums...maybe they could be B-List? Who would they sit with? In all it depends on Donna. She should probably talk to Debi about it. And as for the shower...it all depends on the type of shower. Would you do family and close friends? Or all women invited to the wedding?

Hi, Amanda!!!!! Well, I think Donna already plans to invite them, but I was wondering if other Brides did this. I know wedding traditions are different in different states/countries. I'll probably invite Fred's Mom, to the Shower, since we have enough room!! I better ask Debi though, because if Fred's Parents came, they probably would stay with Debi and Fred. Mary MOB

debismom Posted: Nov 08, 2008 12:24 AM

Re: Etiquette re: your inlaws coming to your sibling's wedding

Posted by wundmoretime

It really depends on the relationship. We do a lot with my DH's sister-n-law's family. They were all invited to our wedding; brothers, sisters and mom. We were invited to the other brother's girlfriend's mom's 70th bday, but we didn't go cause it was my daughter's bday party that day. We invited all the brother's partners parents to the wedding, but only the one came out of the 3. My sister's husband's family is gigantic, so we don't generally get involved, they are already a large bunch without adding more. My brother is not in a serious relationship.

Oh, that's interesting!!! Thanks for sharing!! Mary MOB

del Rio Posted: Nov 08, 2008 12:31 AM

Re: Etiquette re: your inlaws coming to your sibling's wedding

Yes, I know it sounds weird, but I think its proper and have always seen this done with my family and friends for large family events.

debismom Posted: Nov 08, 2008 12:33 AM

Re: Etiquette re: your inlaws coming to your sibling's wedding

Posted by del Rio

Yes, I know it sounds weird, but I think its proper and have always seen this done with my family and friends for large family events.

Hi, Marisol!!!! Thanks for your input!!!!! Mary MOB

MrsJ08 Posted: Nov 08, 2008 12:40 AM

Re: Etiquette re: your inlaws coming to your sibling's wedding

I think she should...my sis is getting married and she plans on inviting my in-laws ...

Even though they are not close I think its a really nice gesture to get the whole family together.

Wifeynella Posted: Nov 08, 2008 04:31 AM

Re: Etiquette re: your inlaws coming to your sibling's wedding

I've never been to a wedding where they weren't invited.

I would invite my FSIL's or FBIL's in laws if they had any.

Kricket212 Posted: Nov 08, 2008 06:54 AM

Re: Etiquette re: your inlaws coming to your sibling's wedding

I invited my sisters inlaw to wedding. Also to the shower...although I don't really know them my mom told me it was something that needed to be done & my sister was very happy when I told her.

lillprincess54 Posted: Nov 08, 2008 08:02 AM

Re: Etiquette re: your inlaws coming to your sibling's wedding

I think each family is a little different, now for m,y sister we didnt invite her IL's. I dont really talk to them plus there relationship has always been shakey.

But for Dh brother, we like his MIl we see her when we go and visit Dh brother and Sil, we did send her an invite to our wedding, but she was unable to attend bc we live in a different state and diddnt have the money to fly to NJ

RadiantBride Posted: Nov 08, 2008 08:48 AM

Re: Etiquette re: your inlaws coming to your sibling's wedding

Since the inlaws are now part of the family I would definitely invite them to the wedding and MIL to the shower. Even for my SIL's baby shower I invited the inlaw so that they can feel included in all family events.

2009wedding Posted: Nov 08, 2008 12:05 PM

Re: Etiquette re: your inlaws coming to your sibling's wedding

When my sister gets married she isn't inviting my in laws or my fsil and her family. I wouldn't expect her to. It would be her day and she should invite who she wants to the wedding. I would support her choice of not inviting them or inviting them I wouldn't push her to do anything cause it would be her day.

lucamon Posted: Nov 08, 2008 01:17 PM

Re: Etiquette re: your inlaws coming to your sibling's wedding

Mary, it's really up to Donna and her FH. It would be nice gesture if she does. That's only if the can fit them on their guest list. The guest list is probably one of the hardest thing to do.
When my brother got married last year, my mom made sure DH's mother was invited to the wedding. She invited her as her friend, not as a guest of the bride and groom. We all sat at the same table. At that time DH and I were engaged.
When we got married in Sept. we also invited my SIL's parent's. Although they couldn't make it to the wedding, they were honored to be invited.

MeaganAndJoeC Posted: Nov 08, 2008 02:00 PM

Re: Etiquette re: your inlaws coming to your sibling's wedding

Each family is very different. It def. depends on the relationship your daughter has with her sister's in laws. My sister's in laws were not invited to my wedding. They are not friendlly with my husband or myself. I think it truely depends on the family!

HTH

roan126 Posted: Nov 08, 2008 03:07 PM

Re: Etiquette re: your inlaws coming to your sibling's wedding

I guess it would really depend on how close the familes are. Both of my BIL's entire families (parents, brothers, sisters, aunts, cousins etc) were invited and came to my wedding, but we have become very close to them over the years, spend holidays with them, etc. They are considered family.

MaggieLuvsJoe Posted: Nov 08, 2008 04:02 PM

Re: Etiquette re: your inlaws coming to your sibling's wedding

It's really up to Donna. I know my family invites the in-laws but FHs family doesn't so I left it up to his mom if she wanted us to invite her other kids in-laws and she said no so we're not inviting them, but I'm inviting my brothers in laws bc its just what we do. HTH