i actually lost my maid of honor in the beginning of my engagement. she became a totally different person and like never asked me to hang out anymore. i also lost touch with a close guy friend that i used to hang out with all the time. now all of a sudden he's expecting an invite to the wedding.
isn't it so weird?? like i always thought my ex-MOH was jealous or whatever. and i thought that my guy friend just stopped talking to me b/c i was 'no fun' anymore. i dunno. anyone else in this boat?
AeroJenn
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Re: ever since you've been engaged/married...
No, actually the opposite. Since we've been married we've been seeing our friends constantly (almost too much!). I have lost touch a little with one of my bridesmaids, but thats mostly because she's in VA and has always been hard to get in touch with. But other than that, we've gotten closer to our firends, if thats even possible.
cookiemonster
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Re: ever since you've been engaged/married...
I don't think I've lost friends necessarily, but I've definitely caught myself babbling incessantly about stupid wedding details while my friends graciously put up with it. When I'm with my friends I make a huge effort not to do that, because I know it's boring to them and it was boring to me for other people's weddings!
ksl268
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Re: ever since you've been engaged/married...
No, we have all become even closer. All my girlfriends have been great about listening to wedding stuff and have been involved in most of the process.
jessandjimiswedding
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Re: ever since you've been engaged/married...
Posted by AeroJenn
No, actually the opposite. Since we've been married we've been seeing our friends constantly (almost too much!). I have lost touch a little with one of my bridesmaids, but thats mostly because she's in VA and has always been hard to get in touch with. But other than that, we've gotten closer to our firends, if thats even possible.
oh yeah well same here, i've gotten a lot closer to family and especially my bridesmaids. but those few ppl i have lost touch with.
i guess they weren't real friends then.
imas98
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Re: ever since you've been engaged/married...
yup
qtdimps23
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Re: ever since you've been engaged/married...
its happening to me now. i feel like my friends (BMs) dont want to hear anything about the wedding...and i specifically try not to talk about it. they act distant. its frustrating.
twinkle164
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Re: ever since you've been engaged/married...
Luckily this hasn't happened to me. But It did happen to a lot of people I know. I think it depends a lot on age and weather your friends are married or single. I'm 35 and most of my friends are married already. However when my cousin got married years ago at 25 most of her friends were single and got jealous. By the time she actually got married some of them didn't even go to the wedding. (jerks) Sorry it just happens some times.
MegBert
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Re: ever since you've been engaged/married...
umm I def get a diff look from everyone..especially because they are all to busy partying in college and doing drugs...I'm 20 so its not the norm to be planning a wedding at 20 so friends are just at different stages of life but whatever..FSIL said something rude about is being young but thats it
SuzArtie69
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Re: ever since you've been engaged/married...
I haven't lost them completely, but this was when FH and I hooked up. I think most of us just went our separate ways.
It's been hard to get everyone together at the same time, there's still phone calls and e-mails going around.
The last time we were all together was at a funeral for one of them. It's wasn't the happiest day, but I'm hoping they will come to the wedding. It would be great to see everyone again. I'd like to try to do a get together before the wedding though.
prettyprincess07
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Re: ever since you've been engaged/married...
I think the truth of the matter is sometimes people arent as happy for 'you' as you'd like them to be or as you would be for them if the roles were reveresed. It's sad b/c sometimes it's a person you've know for years that you'd never think would think that way or react that way to something so special like your wedding planning/day.
Reality is sometimes people are jealous and it rears it's ugly head sometimes at the most inapproriate times, but it happens for a reason at that time as well. If this person is just going through things then it will run its course but sometimes you gotta let people go. The friendship wasnt that important to them in the first place.
diva7531
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Re: ever since you've been engaged/married...
That happened when I was preggo w/ DD. I lost my BFF of 14 years along with another friend. They were just too into partying. I still went out till I was about 4-5 months along. At first it was fun because they had a desi driver, but then when I just couldn't hang anymore, our friendship dwindeled. Oh well, whatever, I know who my true friends are. A lot of friendships suffer/grow stronger with changes in our lives (kids, hubbys, houses) it's all about what you have in common with people. Sorry about your MOH and other guy friend, hope it all works out
Mooshyboo
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Re: ever since you've been engaged/married...
no actually i feel the complete opposite... i had a lot of friends a while back (high school ect - i lost a lof of friends when they all became married and i was still single) now i have new friends and I feel totally completely LOVED!
It will probably change.... everything comes around in cycles....
HamptonsBride
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Re: ever since you've been engaged/married...
I have been lucky with a close group of friends...we've all been friends since grammar school! There were times when it got tough...they all got engaged and i was single...then they all started having kids..i was still single...but we make a point of keeping in touch, even if we can't hang out that much and they are always there if i need them...i did have one friend (guy) who dropped off the planet since he got married...his wife doesn't let him out...hahaha.
JMM7876
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Re: ever since you've been engaged/married...
I havent lost friends BUT I have seen sides of people that I had never seen before. People that try to keep all the attention on them...and try to sabotage things for you ...when I would be the first person to help anyone. Some people can be so selfish and it hurts bc it wasnt expected...
Lots of luck to you...you are better off without them!
LB and DC
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Re: ever since you've been engaged/married...
my close friends and i started drifting apart a tiny bit when FH and i started dating, but that was my fault because i wanted to spend all my time with him. now they don't really call to invite me everywhere they go, but i don't call them that much either. i guess it just happens as you move on different paths... i have found that i spend more time now with those friends who have long-term boyfriends or are engaged/married (bigrd37 you are almost there!) however, i don't think that anyone has completely dropped out of my life because of jealousy or anything... and if they did, just knowing that i can't recall must mean that we weren't that close to begin with!
Mich0621
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Re: ever since you've been engaged/married...
Posted by jessandjimiswedding
did you find that you've lost friends???
i actually lost my maid of honor in the beginning of my engagement. she became a totally different person and like never asked me to hang out anymore. i also lost touch with a close guy friend that i used to hang out with all the time. now all of a sudden he's expecting an invite to the wedding.
isn't it so weird?? like i always thought my ex-MOH was jealous or whatever. and i thought that my guy friend just stopped talking to me b/c i was 'no fun' anymore. i dunno. anyone else in this boat?
Yep, weddings bring out the worst in some people! You start to see who your real friends are!
MattandTricia07
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Re: ever since you've been engaged/married...
Posted by prettyprincess07
I think the truth of the matter is sometimes people arent as happy for 'you' as you'd like them to be or as you would be for them if the roles were reveresed. It's sad b/c sometimes it's a person you've know for years that you'd never think would think that way or react that way to something so special like your wedding planning/day.
Reality is sometimes people are jealous and it rears it's ugly head sometimes at the most inapproriate times, but it happens for a reason at that time as well. If this person is just going through things then it will run its course but sometimes you gotta let people go. The friendship wasnt that important to them in the first place.
I completely agree!!
I don't think I've 'lost' any friends, I just think that a lot of my friends aren't at the same point in their lives. For my friends, who are engaged or married- I have more to talk about with them, then everyone else. It's just a different part of life I guess.
znycgirl
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Re: ever since you've been engaged/married...
We've been together for a loooong time. We now enjoy hanging out as couples w other couples.
PegaLega
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Re: ever since you've been engaged/married...
I would have to say its not that Ive lost friends...its more that we have other things to look forward to. Granted, we like to go out and party every now and then like we are 21 again...but not half as often as our friends. We are saving for a house...baby, etc. we have other things weve set our sights on. Meanwhile most of our friends dont look at it like that.
