EX-Friend issues....long

One of my 'friends' that I have known for 7 years and have considered my best friend and I are not talking. Back in March I was making plans for my birthday and called her up to 'save the date' to go out w/ some other people in the city. She said sure whatever, and didn't call to wish me a happy birthday, and didn't come to my little gathering (not to mention the same thing happened last year). She's the type of person that when she wants something or someone to talk to expects you to be there but isn't ever there for you. Well two months later--right around the beginning of May she sends me an email saying happy belated birthday with a list of excuses why she hadn't been in touch like she lost my number??? she got mugged, lost her cell phone, had tests, exams, work, etc etc and the list went on. I finally felt like I shouldn't be treated like that and sent her back a response that said look you contact people that you care about and think about and obviously if you weren't able to talk to me or stop by my house then I wasn't important enough. So she writes back and blasts me that the door goes both ways, etc. Well I got engaged a few days later than the email fights, and so I never told her my good news. Part of me wanted to but the other part didn't want to... to top it all off she is friends w/ my little sister as well. So naturally my little sister told our friend that I got engaged. You'd think she would call, to say congrats, right? Well no, she told my sister that she feels it is my news and that I should be the one to contact her. She called my sister tonight and asked her to go out for drinks (they both don't work 9-5 like me so I probably won't have gone anyway) but its just rude to me to keep being friends with her and to not even acknowledge that I exist.. Am I wrong or just being stubborn? I just feel like she is at fault b/c most people don't tell someone happy birthday 2 months later and say I hope you're only mad at me for a day.

you know - i have had a lot of people in my life like that and have dealt with a similiar situation. maybe i wouldn't 'call' her - but if you see her - say 'hi' - or something -if your sister is going ot continue 2b her friend you are going to have to deal with her (like it or not) just so its not uncomfortable for either of you - i say - suck it up - be the bigger person - but DO NOT forget how she treated you - and maybe demote HER to the bottom of your friend list.

its sad than many 'friends' become aquaintances (phonetic) as time passes - maybe she is just one of them.

Its better than having an enemy.

good luck....hope it all works out for you

I have a friend who I have been friends with for several years. When my FI was looking for rings he thought it would be nice to have her help -she practically told me every detail about my ring-ruining the surprise-I had gotten sick and was home for a week and no call no anything from her-nice close friend right-finally I told her that I was dissapointed in her-she went nuts-email war is not even the word for what happened-I decided to stop speaking to her because I deserve to be treated like I treat my friends-

then I get engaged-we have mutual friends-and she knew the big news-I saw her a few times from a far and she did not say anything to me-I did not call because I felt like she had no right to share in such a special thing when she had almost ruined it-

I finally ran into her and made up with her-she said that she would not have called because she was uncomfortable-

She has now become a bottom list friend-I never ever go out of my way for her-and I realize what type of person she is and what she is all about...if it makes it easier on you just say hi and bye to this girl-and know that she screwed up not you-focus your attention on your good friends and your upcoming wedding :)

Long post I know-but just wanted to show you how amazingly wrong people can be...