Farts!

LMAo. I never thought I would see this on here. And I have that book the gas we pass. it is a funny story.

Dale's saying...

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Why fart and waste it when you can burp and taste it

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I am glad to see we still are a classy group on here. LOL

let fart be free b/c it killed poor ole Mary Lee

SO FUNNY! TOday I was gonna post this question: Do you remember the first time you farted in front of your man???? lolol
I was mortified!

I am tire dof being stunk out of the bedroom. FH farts all night long and they are AWFUL . When I tell him in the morning he thinks I am crazy and doesn't believe me.

My baby gives me the gift of a Dutch Oven almost every night. He calls it sharing

OMG!! This thread is killing me!!!!

My daddypoo always said 'better to bear the shame than the pain'.

6 years and I still have never farted in front of FI. I feel it would ruin my feminine mystique

Wherever you may be
Let your wind go free




OK - that's FH's comment on it. Not mine.
I only pass gas in the house or when I'm by myself. If I'm out somewhere I try to keep it in at all costs.

South Beach Diet and probably Atkins makes you gassy. I'm trying to be on the SBD and I've noticed more gas. Not a good thing. I'm buying Beano this week.

When I was in the hospital in 2001 all the residents would ask me 'are you passing gas' and finally I was like 'would you stop asking me that it's embarassing to say I am'!!! But in my case passing gas was a good thing.

Actually I've been more gassy lately and FH has been less. Kinda scary.

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Posted by wenndypoo

OMG!! This thread is killing me!!!!

My daddypoo always said 'better to bear the shame than the pain'.

6 years and I still have never farted in front of FI. I feel it would ruin my feminine mystique

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hahahahaha
I wish I could say I haven't
oh well

My FH farts all the time but I swear they never smell. I can never say you think your sh** dont stink cause it doesnt.

OMG! This is too funny.

Since we're all sharing, the other morning I must have farted in my sleep, and woke myself up! Thankfully DH didn't hear it!

Sound like you all need to order some of these !

I got one for my brother for X-mas as a joke, but he says it really works!

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Posted by julz33

Sound like you all need to order some of these !

I got one for my brother for X-mas as a joke, but he says it really works!

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OMG!!!!!!!!

OK, this is really gross, but my doggie has been spoiled with table food throughout the whole holiday yadda yadda, so I told everyone please do not give him anymore, he will get sick. Of course no one listens & kept feeding him.

WELL, my adorable little pug jumps on our bed, sits his curly little pug butt right in between our pillows (me & FH) & lets out a loud, earth shaking, swampy sounding fart. I runa way screaming like my hair is on fire. Will laughs & thinks this is hysterical. So the pug gets up... yeah the dog gambled & LOST!!!! I had to wash my sheets, tha mattress pad & I even steam cleaned the mattress.

Happy Friggin New Year

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Posted by HearzBellz

OK, this is really gross, but my doggie has been spoiled with table food throughout the whole holiday yadda yadda, so I told everyone please do not give him anymore, he will get sick. Of course no one listens & kept feeding him.

WELL, my adorable little pug jumps on our bed, sits his curly little pug butt right in between our pillows (me & FH) & lets out a loud, earth shaking, swampy sounding fart. I runa way screaming like my hair is on fire. Will laughs & thinks this is hysterical. So the pug gets up... yeah the dog gambled & LOST!!!! I had to wash my sheets, tha mattress pad & I even steam cleaned the mattress.

Happy Friggin New Year

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OMG!!!!!! That is soooo funny!! But I would have been pissed too!!!

DH will let one rip and then 'wave' the air towards his face to see if it was a 'good one' LOL

does anyone else's DH do this??

I got one for you ...

I havent read this whole post... just replying to the original post.

My mother (the real one) used to be very big on appearances. So when I was little this was her saying...

Men Fart
Women Poof

Meaning ladies don't fart we just pass air lightly. Later my father would say...

Men Fart with Pride and Honor
Women drop silent bombs with deceit and wickedness.

So there ya go.

Thanks for this thread!!! This has been hilarious to read!!!

FH's uncle always says when he burps 'it's better it should come out that end, rather than hold it in and it would be a fart that would kill us all!!!!!'

When we hang out with our friends, we have to have a window open. It's one big gas fest!! The sounds that come from some of our butts are hilarious!!!!

All that I can say is I can relate to the pug story! I have two of them!

Fart ---> hahahaa, my husband swears that girls don't fart...until my college roommate ruined that for him! Then, once we moved in together, his beliefs were thrown out the window!

My FH's grandma says it's 'healthy to pop'... LOL


The silent but deadly ones.. oh my! and the worst is the 'dutch oven'!

LMAOOOO