My fiance god daughter (niece) is 9 years old. she will just turn 10 for our wedding. (she is short for her age)
a few mos ago, her mother(FSIL) assumed we were making her a jr BM cause her cousin is doing that for her wedding. i said i wasnt sure at the time.
so when i showed her the FG dress I liked friday, she appeared upset saying it was too childish & it will make her look fat, she can only wear A-line dress (she has a baby fat belly, which is still cute at her age) and that i should have her in a modified version of the BM dresses (which i dont feel would be age appropriate IMO) I informed her nicely unless she has a growth spurt in the next 7mos she will be SR FG and in charge of the other FG & RB and my train. i thought giving her extra responsibilities will make her feel more grownup at least. i feel I picked a cute dress, that is age appropriate I really dont want 3 different dresses. I am very confused by the JR BM thing, thought it was more of a teen role. Am i wrong? how would you handle it? am i turning into a bridezilla?? attached the drama dress lol
That is a cute FG dress and i really like it and first of all a FG really should not wear things like JR BM dress ...i mean i having two JR's and its like you said in your post that JRs are more of a teen role thing not a KID ....remember its your wedding and if they have a problem tell them listen its what I want and that is that ...end of story ...if they dont like it well to bad ...but sometimes u have to say it weather they like it or not ...people get way to involved and they dont realize that its you wedding NOT THERE's ..Good luck and i would stay with the dress!!!
RussianBride
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Re: FG vs JR BM Drama lol
That is a very cute FG dress, suitable for a 10 year old. I agree that JR BM is for a teenager & a 10 year old should not be wearing an A-line dress! Stick with it & remember that it is your wedding. Don't let anyone ruin that for you!
MommaMia
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FG vs JR BM Drama lol
I have a 9 year old daughter and based on the age and grade level I know she would be humiliated if I made her a flower girl. At 9 or 10 years old I think it is more appropriate to do jr bm ESP if the child and not the parent is upset. Keep in mind a child age 9 or 10 could have their period ( I know tmi) would you want to wear what a 5 year old or less is wearing?
Again jmo.
Good luck!
youmewe
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FG vs JR BM Drama lol
I have a 10 year old daughter who is my jr bridesmaid and I can say that although the dress u picked is cute it is not appropriate for a 10 year old girl...my daughter is wearing the same color as bm but in an age apporpraite style. Btw as previous post stated she already has her period so it is possible. The dress you picked is more appropriate for six and under..I also have a six year old and this is more up her alley. I don't think youre being a bridezilla because even as a mother I was diappointed I too had to have three different dresss in the bridal party but it really looks good regardless....and most of all each bp member is happy also...it is difficult to get past your vision sometimes....good luck
mattandjess2013
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FG vs JR BM Drama lol
I don't have children but I teach 9 and 10 year Olds and can say that dress is not something that they would wear. It's cute for a 4 year old but way too young for a 9 year old. I would do the same color as your bm dresses and do an a line dress with straps for her.
EAY213
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FG vs JR BM Drama lol
I was a jr bridesmaid at my sisters wedding when I was 12. I wore an off white satin dress with short sleeves and the sash was the color of the bridesmaids dresses. It wasn't too adult like but definitely not childisH. I liked it and it looked good in the bridal party because of the tied in color. You should look for something like that for her, I agree with the others that the dress you picked, while beautiful, is too young for a 9 or 10 year old.
cj52514
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Re: FG vs JR BM Drama lol
Is it possible to put her in the same color as the bridesmaids, but make her walk up the aisle holding the flower girl's hand? My FH's sister did this at her wedding. Her niece was 13 and her little sister was 4. The 4 year old was the flower girl and the 13 year old had the title junior bridesmaid, but they walked up the aisle together.
Kristin31613
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FG vs JR BM Drama lol
Being a teacher, I agree with the above posters. It is a gorgeous dress but not appropriate for a 9/10 year old, even if she is short for her age. My niece is 11 and a Jr. Bridesmaid. She will be in the same color as the other bridesmaids. I can tell you from her reaction of when I asked her that she LOVES her role and the responsibilities. It is up to you, but I think that the 9 year old is going to resent the dress, which could result in issues of her acting out bc she feels like she is being treated like a baby.
saxtrevNmeg
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Re: FG vs JR BM Drama lol
I went straight to the source. LOL.
My future step-daughter just turned eight, and she said the dress was really cute and she thinks she could wear it. HOWEVER, she is just a touch younger than your FG AND she declared HERSELF to be flower girl. If she had asked to be a Jr BM, I would have done that, as FH's kids being happy with their role in the wedding is very important to me.
I know your FG isn't about to become your step-daughter, so it is a very different situation, but at her age, she could give a valuable opinion. Would you consider asking her directly? I really think it could depend on the individual child. I'm a teacher and have three future stepkids and many friends with kids, so I know some girls who would be comfortable as a FG at 12/13, and others who would resent being treated so 'young' at 9/10...
scottsbride
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FG vs JR BM Drama lol
My flower girls are my daughter 2 and my niece 8. The bridesmaid dresses are too old looking for her. The 8 year old and 2 year old will be wearing the same dress. Then again her mom is cool with it and my niece is super easy and was like ok. This is the dress I choose for them: http://www.alfredangelo.com/collections/productdisplay.aspx?productID=c9cc8cf9-d8ca-4085-a431-453bcc95e2a5&categoryID=76793ebf-607f-4683-82b6-d880a00a2197&pg=1&colorId1=
I think the dress you picked is cute. At the end its your wedding and you do what you want.
Yessica062213
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FG vs JR BM Drama lol
That's a beautiful dress!! I'm having 5 flower girls and the oldest will be 10 by nxt yr and she will wear something like that (but in white)!...I have a junior bridesmaid that will be 12 and she will a diff dress but that will match the wedding color scheme (blush pink).
nyrvixen
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FG vs JR BM Drama lol
That dress looks cute for a girl that 8 or younger but I think by age 10 you should probably look for something the same color as your BM dresses but more age appropriate
Karin
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FG vs JR BM Drama lol
I agree with asking the little girl what she would like. But more than anything, I am sad that the mother of a ten year old little girl is mostly worried that her daughter will 'look fat'.
JennieBee
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FG vs JR BM Drama lol
I did ask her if she was ok being SR FG. She said yes, only person who seems phased is her mother. She will be 10 by 1week and she is the shortest in her class-- I don't like making children grow up too fast. Idk lol lots to think about! Thanks for your input guys.
RussianBride
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Re: FG vs JR BM Drama lol
Posted by Karin
I agree with asking the little girl what she would like. But more than anything, I am sad that the mother of a ten year old little girl is mostly worried that her daughter will 'look fat'.
I agree! You should ask the girl what role she wants & let her chose from dresses that you already like - that way she can feel like she has a part in this & her opinion matters. But yeah it's sad that the mother is worried she will look fat.
Good luck! Everything will work out, don't worry.
JennieBee
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Re: FG vs JR BM Drama lol
Posted by Karin
I agree with asking the little girl what she would like. But more than anything, I am sad that the mother of a ten year old little girl is mostly worried that her daughter will 'look fat'.
I did address that at the time, said its still baby fat she will grow into it. And that the sash will take the emphasize off of it.
scottsbride
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FG vs JR BM Drama lol
Not sure where you saw that dress but nancyaugust.com has a bunch of similar dresses for under $50.00. I get my daughter dresses from there and they are beautiful!
nyrvixen
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Re: FG vs JR BM Drama lol
Posted by JennieBee
I did ask her if she was ok being SR FG. She said yes, only person who seems phased is her mother. She will be 10 by 1week and she is the shortest in her class-- I don't like making children grow up too fast. Idk lol lots to think about! Thanks for your input guys.
She might not be comfortable telling you that she would rather be a JR BM and she might have said something to her mother about it
mattandjess2013
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Re: FG vs JR BM Drama lol
Posted by nyrvixen
Posted by JennieBee
I did ask her if she was ok being SR FG. She said yes, only person who seems phased is her mother. She will be 10 by 1week and she is the shortest in her class-- I don't like making children grow up too fast. Idk lol lots to think about! Thanks for your input guys.
She might not be comfortable telling you that she would rather be a JR BM and she might have said something to her mother about it
This! Kids that age aren't always comfortable telling adults what they feel
