Has anyone else here had a problem with finding an officiant?
Neither FH or I are highly religious, we certainly don't follow any organized religion and have both left the churches we grew up with a long time ago. We're not that religious and for various reasons didn't feel welcome there.
We are spiritual and generally believe in good will - but its not like we have a priest/paster/rabbi who knows us to run our ceremony.
I feel really weird using someone we don't know for our ceremony. I mean, cookie cutter wedding? A person who doesn't know at all requiring marriage counseling (yes, someone did).
Anyone else in this boat?
We have a friends of ours (somewhat close) who is an ordained interfaith minister and has run a number of weddings. We've considered asking him( pretty nice guy, very easy going, knows us both) but felt a little weird with a friend running a ceremony - like it might be too casual.
I've be curious to hear from anyone else in this situation - don't know what to do.
vppjzv
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Shanti12
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Re: Finding an Officiant
Nope! Met with Pastor April and I was DONE! She writes out the first draft of the ceremony while you are talking with her and it was so personal and so nice. Not cookie cutter at all. Rev Deb is also great and similar from what I can tell! (I saw them both at the LIW expo)
Lau1007
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Finding an Officiant
I'm in pretty much the exact same boat as you. I do know some people who have been very happy with the officiants they've chosen, so I am going to speak to a few and see how it goes. Neither FH nor I know anyone personally who would be able to marry us, so we don't really have a choice.
Also, my friend is getting married next month, and was worried about being cookie cutter, but her officiant is totally open and wants her input, and through a lot of phone calls ane emails my friend is basically helping write her own ceremony.
melnmatt2013
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Re: Finding an Officiant
Posted by vppjzv
We were somewhat similar and decided on using a friend for the same reason of not wanting a stranger to do it. She knows us as a couple and has seen us grow and we think it's the perfect touch to our ceremony. We are having her ordained online and are actually really excited about it.
this! We were having a hard time with the thought of spending $1,000 on a rabbi that doesn't even know us for a 20-25 minute ceremony. We looked into getting FH's brother ordained and are planning on going that route.
VPPJZV, are you using Universal Life Church? That is what we have been looking into and I think what we are going to go with.
youmewe
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Re: Finding an Officiant
Posted by melnmatt2013
Posted by vppjzv
We were somewhat similar and decided on using a friend for the same reason of not wanting a stranger to do it. She knows us as a couple and has seen us grow and we think it's the perfect touch to our ceremony. We are having her ordained online and are actually really excited about it.
this! We were having a hard time with the thought of spending $1,000 on a rabbi that doesn't even know us for a 20-25 minute ceremony. We looked into getting FH's brother ordained and are planning on going that route.
VPPJZV, are you using Universal Life Church? That is what we have been looking into and I think what we are going to go with.
ULC..have a friend or someone special register and do it! My father is a minister so I didn't have this problem but he wasn't sure if he was going to do it because of emotions and we were going to have my sister register with ULC!
melnmatt2013
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Re: Finding an Officiant
melnmatt2013
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Re: Finding an Officiant
Posted by youmewe
Posted by melnmatt2013
Posted by vppjzv
We were somewhat similar and decided on using a friend for the same reason of not wanting a stranger to do it. She knows us as a couple and has seen us grow and we think it's the perfect touch to our ceremony. We are having her ordained online and are actually really excited about it.
this! We were having a hard time with the thought of spending $1,000 on a rabbi that doesn't even know us for a 20-25 minute ceremony. We looked into getting FH's brother ordained and are planning on going that route.
VPPJZV, are you using Universal Life Church? That is what we have been looking into and I think what we are going to go with.
ULC..have a friend or someone special register and do it! My father is a minister so I didn't have this problem but he wasn't sure if he was going to do it because of emotions and we were going to have my sister register with ULC!
vppjzv
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jassy119
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Finding an Officiant
FH and I aren't religious either. We consider ourselves spiritual. We considered using his best friends dad but he is a lil too relgious for us. I also considered using a friend but we want them to just be able to enjoy the wedding.
We ended up booking Pastor April. After hearing so many good things about her and seeing her in other brides videos I knew I wanted her. She will custom write the ceremony exactly to your liking and she speaks beautifully. I saw her in person at wedding a cpl of months ago and was so happy I booked her.
katnwill
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Finding an Officiant
FH's cousin got married a few weeks ago she used Rev Rudy Tufaro. He was really good IMO. He personalized the ceremony and included the story of how there relatiosnhip began to when they got engaged. I plan on meeting with him. I haven't heard anything about him on here but if you google him you will find some reviews.
futurearias
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Re: Finding an Officiant
Posted by Shanti12
Nope! Met with Pastor April and I was DONE! She writes out the first draft of the ceremony while you are talking with her and it was so personal and so nice. Not cookie cutter at all. Rev Deb is also great and similar from what I can tell! (I saw them both at the LIW expo)
Pastor April!!!
tonyjess
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Finding an Officiant
Definitely Pastor April! Lots of us on here are using her as an officiant it appears! Check out her website and videos. http://www.churchofancientways.org/index.html
stormstryker
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Finding an Officiant
We are using Rabbi Frank Tamburello. We are meeting with Rev. Deb on Sat.... they both understand we aren't religious and are very cool with it!
Butterflyfaye
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Finding an Officiant
So... strange update -
The friend of mine who is licensed Interfaith minister and has performed multiple weddings is doing a wedding/elopement in a few weeks I've been invited to. I feel awkward going - I'd be the date/travel companion of one of the couple's close friends in a really super small elopement ceremony.
But.. he woudl be minister, which would at least give me some insight, right?
JE829
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Re: Finding an Officiant
Posted by Shanti12
Nope! Met with Pastor April and I was DONE! She writes out the first draft of the ceremony while you are talking with her and it was so personal and so nice. Not cookie cutter at all. Rev Deb is also great and similar from what I can tell! (I saw them both at the LIW expo)
EXACTLY THIS ...
PhD2012-Mrs2013
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Finding an Officiant
A family friend (former Priest who gave up being a priest 35+ yrs ago) to start a family, offered to do our ceremony. He is going to do the ULC to be able to marry us. Prior to his offer to conduct our ceremony, I was going to use Rev.Shari, a friend of mine. She will help you customize and perform any kind of ceremony you would like..
