So we went last night to check out the dresses that FH's evil aunt bought for her daughters (2 of my flower girls) hoping that they would match the dress that I had made for my cousin (also a flowergirl). I walked in hoping for the best but expecting the worst. She showed us the dresses, and the color was off not very off, but off, the fabric was completely wrong but the style was right. Overall, it was passable and in the interest of peace, I decided it would be okay. There was only one problem, the fact that the dress had toole on it. FH said 'okay, its not so bad, all you need to do is take the toole off'. To this she replied (and I quote), 'NO. I am not doing anything to the dress, this is the way it is and if you don't like it, then the girls will not walk down the aisle'. FH and I both said okay and we picked up our coats to leave. I turned to her and said 'Don't think for one second that you are bringing those kids to my wedding in those dresses so they look like they are in my bridal party. I don't care what you do with the dresses but they cannot wear them to my wedding' and we left.
We told FH's mother what happened and she called the aunt. We told her not to bother because at this point, we don't even want the girls in the wedding. FH's mother said no, she wants them in and a fight began. FH got so angry he acutally called his aunt and told her ' Do me a favor, don't come to my ****ing wedding' and hung up on her.
It's sad that a grown woman (and a mother to boot) can be so selfish and frankly, she sounds like a spiteful biatch. Who is she to decide on the dresses and make threats that her daughters won't be in the wedding if it's not up to her specifications? It's YOUR day not theirs. This isn't a beauty paegent, it's your wedding. I think you and your FI did the right thing. Put her in her place. It's her kids that are going to be upset about not being in the party (every little girl wants to be a flower girl), she's pathetic. Is this your FMIL's sister? I can't believe she's defending her attitude. Good Luck, and don't let it get to you.
OMG, I am soooo sorry, this situation is terrible. I am glad you & FH sttod up to the aunt. As for the Mom, she should understand this is yours & her sons day!
To make you feel better (I hope), I lost my flower girl yesterday & with 3 months left, I have to ask another little girl now...so late into it...long story why but I hope all works out for you. Keep us posted.
Actually, she is FH's mother's Sister in Law, not sister. She uses her kids as bait to get her way and dangles them over FH's mother and grandmother. FH is 26 and his brother is 20. These girls are the daughters of my FMIL's brother. The girls (twins) are both 5 so they are the babies of the family so naturally they are spoiled. As far as them being upset about not being in the wedding, its not even like that. I can't explain it but I don't think they even understand the concept. I know that sounds strange because they are 5 but she treats them like babies and that is how they act. I don't believe they even know what a 'wedding' is, nor do they care. Besides FH's grandmother (who is also the grandmother of the girls) is the one who really wants to see them walk down the aisle. She is taking that away from her MIL by doing this. I am done trying to compromise. I no longer want them in the wedding. She has to deal with the consequences now.
Well hell, Tara. I'm sorry to hear this. You don't need this drama. I'd really like to know just exactly WHO this woman thinks she is? And is she aware that she already HAD her wedding? That this isn't HER wedding?
It's not over though. FH's mother is all but insisting that they be in it. She is all 'what if we get her to agree to cut the toole off'. She doesn't understand that we no longer want them in the wedding, toole or not. It's way past the dress aspect now. We have moved on to utter disrespect and obnoxious controlling attempts. She does not know what she is up against. I can be a first class A-1 ***** right up there with the best of them.
Over my dead body will those girls be in my wedding and if she shows up with them in the dresses (if she even shows up at all after what FH said to her last night), I will throw a fit right then and there in the middle of my wedding. I already decided to tell my photographer not to take any pics of them.
I'm really proud of you sticking up for yourself and your wedding. I would have done the same and I think you should stand your ground and not give in. This is your wedding and this women has caused so many problems for you, that it is way past the dresses now. Stay strong!
I cannot believe the nerve of some people!!! But my only reason to say think about it a little more is if you would be disappointing two little innocent five-year olds that have already gotten their dresses for the big event. I'm not sure how close you are to them or if this would be a consideration of yours but its the only thing that would keep me from kicking the entire family off the guest list!!!
What I don't understand is how people can act like this? Some people have a lot of nerve. If anyone attempted to behave like this I would flip out, and they would not be allowed to come to the wedding. Does she not understand that this is your and your FH's day? What about the rest of the family too, why don't they seem to understand that too. I wouldn't let the girls in the wedding, because that would make this beatch happy, actually it probably won't because it seems like this aunt will never be a happy person, no matter what the circumstances. Forget about her and her kids, they are not worth the aggravation.
Sorry to rant I just get worked up when people act like total morons!!!!!
