FMIL dress problems....

How do you tell your FMIL that NO she cannot wear cream, ivory or her version of champagne (read: cream) to your wedding?!

She did this at her own daughter's wedding - she wore a cream suit. Her daughter (now 6 years later) is still bothered by it.

I mentioned to FH and he said he'd take care of it. Not sure if anyone has any advice...

Funny thing is, she's really nice. Just doesn't seem to think it's inappropriate. Maybe I should sic my mom on her! But all laughing aside, I'm a wee bit concerned.

How about being totally honest with her. Think of a color you like and say something like, ' I was thinking that you look great in (Color) and maybe you can find a dress in that color for the wedding. I would really rather you wear something more lively'. And if she says, 'I was thinking cream', you can just be honest and say, 'I would rather you not wear that color, or anything light on my wedding day' It would mean a lot to me if you wore something darker, how about, (color), you look great in that!


HTH......If all else fails, tell FH that he needs to talk to her, and if she shows up in cream your NOT going to be Happy

I told my mom and FMIL that I would like to go shopping with them. FMIL has NEVER been to a wedding (she was married at the justice of the peace with no reception) literally. So I said ok ladies when do you want to go. They both said May. I said great! The bridal party is wearing red so I don't know if either of you want to but my only rule is no white or any variation of white. They both laughed and then spoke a little and came back to ask if since it is a black tie wedding can they wear black? I said absolutely.

I think maybe talk to her and your mom together about color choices so she doesn't feel singled out. If you are not comfortable talking to her yourself.

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Posted by GabrielleandJohn

I told my mom and FMIL that I would like to go shopping with them. FMIL has NEVER been to a wedding (she was married at the justice of the peace with no reception) literally. So I said ok ladies when do you want to go. They both said May. I said great! The bridal party is wearing red so I don't know if either of you want to but my only rule is no white or any variation of white. They both laughed and then spoke a little and came back to ask if since it is a black tie wedding can they wear black? I said absolutely.

I think maybe talk to her and your mom together about color choices so she doesn't feel singled out. If you are not comfortable talking to her yourself.

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I agree...

im pretty blunt with my FMIL. i told her what colors i dont want her to wear and what i would like. you have to be bridezilla with FMILs!

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Posted by FullersBride

How about being totally honest with her. Think of a color you like and say something like, ' I was thinking that you look great in (Color) and maybe you can find a dress in that color for the wedding. I would really rather you wear something more lively'. And if she says, 'I was thinking cream', you can just be honest and say, 'I would rather you not wear that color, or anything light on my wedding day' It would mean a lot to me if you wore something darker, how about, (color), you look great in that!


HTH......If all else fails, tell FH that he needs to talk to her, and if she shows up in cream your NOT going to be Happy

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I agree. Just talk to her about it. If she is really just totally ignorant just be blunt and open with her. If she still doesn't get it have FH and FSIL talk to her about it!

GOOD LUCK!!!

I would just go ahead and say it. Just tell her 'i know you mentionned wearing cream and I wanted to let you know before you went out and bought anything that I'd really rather you not wear anything in the white family.'

I flat out told my mom and FMlL no white, cream, and no pink (since my girls have pink in their dresses). They were fine with it.

The prob is that I've basically made myself clear to her the colors I think would look nice and would blend well with the other colors. And she keeps saying cream - the first time she mentioned it, I looked right at her and said please don't do that, etc etc.

FH volunteered to say something... looks like I'm going to have to take him up on the offer. My biggest issue with this is that it's an issue at all.

Thanks ladies, I probably just needed to vent.

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Posted by L&R

The prob is that I've basically made myself clear to her the colors I think would look nice and would blend well with the other colors. And she keeps saying cream - the first time she mentioned it, I looked right at her and said please don't do that, etc etc.

FH volunteered to say something... looks like I'm going to have to take him up on the offer. My biggest issue with this is that it's an issue at all.

Thanks ladies, I probably just needed to vent.

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Oh NO! You said something to her and she STILL keeps saying cream??? Thats so rude -- she's just ignoring you. Definately take FH up on the offer and have him talk to her.

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Posted by neener1211

for this, you need to bluntly tell her the colors she can't wear to your wedding. She'll have to deal..and just go shopping with her to make sure she orders an appropriate color.

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yup. i agree. this is just one of those times where you have to be straight forward and say 'It would really bother me if you choose to wear ANYTHING that is even CLOSE to white/ivory. It's just not appropriate in my family, and I want you to please respect this'

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Posted by MJDoc12

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Posted by neener1211

for this, you need to bluntly tell her the colors she can't wear to your wedding. She'll have to deal..and just go shopping with her to make sure she orders an appropriate color.

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yup. i agree. this is just one of those times where you have to be straight forward and say 'It would really bother me if you choose to wear ANYTHING that is even CLOSE to white/ivory. It's just not appropriate in my family, and I want you to please respect this'

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i wish i could take you around with me to do my dirty work! I'd love to see you in action girl