FMIL & FSIL VENT!
Hello Ladies!!!
Well,
I have decided I will be needing a DOC for my wedding. There are a lot of extra things I need help with that day such as the set up of my candy buffet, menus, placecards, pew bows, flowers, etc. I also have a very overwhelming situation at home. My father is very ill, I have two disabled siblings, and just a lot to take care of that morning. I can't do it by myself. My maid of honor is my little sister. I don't expect her to fulfill all the MOH duties for many reasons. My FSIL is pregnant with her second child and my FMIL is too preoccupied with that right now. My mom is too busy with stuff going on at home. Honestly, I don't have much of a support system. I only have FH (in regards to the wedding planning) I work two jobs. M-F 8:30-10:00. I'm not home till 12 a.m. sometimes! FH's schedule is just as bad if not worse! We only have the weekends to run a gazillion errands. We're both extremely run down from life and work and our families really are not helping. So I mentioned the idea of DOC which at first was far fetched because we didn't think we'd afford it. I gave myself a crazy budget of less than 500 bucks and started to do my homework. I didnt think id find anyone but was surprised that I found so many vendors here on LIW that matched my price if not lower! I will be meeting with Modern DAy Affair this weekend and im tryuly excited because they gave me the best offer. A lot lower than I expected and not one but TWO coordinators. I was so happy last night and so was FH. I mean, we r having close 300 ppl at this wedding. We don't want to go nuts and argue and have to deal with nonsense that day!
I gotta tell you, FH and I have all of our vendors practically, and a lot of the thingns we need already and we are totally UNDER budget! why? because we did our homework. I have never been so frugal in my life!!! and I think a lot of it has to do with the fact that we're paying for the wedding. we're not getting any other money, or help. which is fine.
Anyway, so it first started with FSIL. I was so happy about the deal with got for the DOC that I texted her immedietely! I thought she'd appreciate it because I know she went thru ALOT on her wedding day. NOTHING went right and she was miserable! but she was mad. I mean MAD! she basically said it was a stupid expense, we were wasting our money when we can have other people help us like her. (really? with two babies?? and she's in the bridal party with her hubbie? impossible!!!) and she said 'don't worry you will have plenty of time during the cocktail hour to set up the candy table youself.' (really? before or after we take a gazillion pictures?)
So I told her (mainly to shut her up) that nothing was set in stone anyway and i was just trying to tell her about it.
Then FH got the rest of it from FMIL at home last night. I mean it was a BRAWL! Yelling about how we are wasting our money.
Can I just say that we are so good with everything so far(money wise). I'm making the girls boquets from silk flowers and menu cards,, place cards, favors, etc. We have saved so much money!
Our vendors aare included with our hall.
The money we want to use for the DOC is very minimal.
I just don't understand the problem. FSIL spent $3,000 on invites for her wedding! and while that's fine if you can afford it, I just don't see myself spending that much on anything unless its a huge vendors like limos, flowers, or music.
but WE get crapped on for spending almost NOTHING on something important like a DOC. I'm very dissapointed and saddended that we feel like we have no support. My family at least agrees that we need DOC's because they know that I freak out and that I have ALOT on my plate!
Since the moment FSIL got married, everything she did was perfect, she can do no wrong yadda yadda ydda. But FH and I, EVEYTHING we do gets questioned and im just tired of it. UGH!
anyway, what do u guys think about this? Do you guys think A DOC is important? I'd like to hear your input and maybe I can explain to FMIL and FSIL why they are so important.
sorry this was so long!!!! \
love you guys
Well,
I have decided I will be needing a DOC for my wedding. There are a lot of extra things I need help with that day such as the set up of my candy buffet, menus, placecards, pew bows, flowers, etc. I also have a very overwhelming situation at home. My father is very ill, I have two disabled siblings, and just a lot to take care of that morning. I can't do it by myself. My maid of honor is my little sister. I don't expect her to fulfill all the MOH duties for many reasons. My FSIL is pregnant with her second child and my FMIL is too preoccupied with that right now. My mom is too busy with stuff going on at home. Honestly, I don't have much of a support system. I only have FH (in regards to the wedding planning) I work two jobs. M-F 8:30-10:00. I'm not home till 12 a.m. sometimes! FH's schedule is just as bad if not worse! We only have the weekends to run a gazillion errands. We're both extremely run down from life and work and our families really are not helping. So I mentioned the idea of DOC which at first was far fetched because we didn't think we'd afford it. I gave myself a crazy budget of less than 500 bucks and started to do my homework. I didnt think id find anyone but was surprised that I found so many vendors here on LIW that matched my price if not lower! I will be meeting with Modern DAy Affair this weekend and im tryuly excited because they gave me the best offer. A lot lower than I expected and not one but TWO coordinators. I was so happy last night and so was FH. I mean, we r having close 300 ppl at this wedding. We don't want to go nuts and argue and have to deal with nonsense that day!
I gotta tell you, FH and I have all of our vendors practically, and a lot of the thingns we need already and we are totally UNDER budget! why? because we did our homework. I have never been so frugal in my life!!! and I think a lot of it has to do with the fact that we're paying for the wedding. we're not getting any other money, or help. which is fine.
Anyway, so it first started with FSIL. I was so happy about the deal with got for the DOC that I texted her immedietely! I thought she'd appreciate it because I know she went thru ALOT on her wedding day. NOTHING went right and she was miserable! but she was mad. I mean MAD! she basically said it was a stupid expense, we were wasting our money when we can have other people help us like her. (really? with two babies?? and she's in the bridal party with her hubbie? impossible!!!) and she said 'don't worry you will have plenty of time during the cocktail hour to set up the candy table youself.' (really? before or after we take a gazillion pictures?)
So I told her (mainly to shut her up) that nothing was set in stone anyway and i was just trying to tell her about it.
Then FH got the rest of it from FMIL at home last night. I mean it was a BRAWL! Yelling about how we are wasting our money.
Can I just say that we are so good with everything so far(money wise). I'm making the girls boquets from silk flowers and menu cards,, place cards, favors, etc. We have saved so much money!
Our vendors aare included with our hall.
The money we want to use for the DOC is very minimal.
I just don't understand the problem. FSIL spent $3,000 on invites for her wedding! and while that's fine if you can afford it, I just don't see myself spending that much on anything unless its a huge vendors like limos, flowers, or music.
but WE get crapped on for spending almost NOTHING on something important like a DOC. I'm very dissapointed and saddended that we feel like we have no support. My family at least agrees that we need DOC's because they know that I freak out and that I have ALOT on my plate!
Since the moment FSIL got married, everything she did was perfect, she can do no wrong yadda yadda ydda. But FH and I, EVEYTHING we do gets questioned and im just tired of it. UGH!
anyway, what do u guys think about this? Do you guys think A DOC is important? I'd like to hear your input and maybe I can explain to FMIL and FSIL why they are so important.
sorry this was so long!!!! \
love you guys
