FMIL has fallen off the wagon

Original post by runnerbride1023

Feb 03, 2010 09:22 AM

My mom just called me and didn't want to say anything but needed to vent...

apparently FMIL has been giving my mom the hardest time with my shower. My mom called her to ask for a guest list and to talk about it and FMIL said to her 'You dont expect me to pay for this right?' Which my mom didn't, although it would have been nice. Apparently on the call they discussed inviting around 50 ppl. FMIL sent my mom a list with 30 ppl on it leaving my friends and my family limited to 20. And when my mom asked her if she can reduce the list to 25 she said she absolutely could not.

My mom has been planning the entire thing with one of my friends and my bubbie. (Still all surprises on the dets). I feel horrible that my mom has to deal with FIL drama. They have been so difficult lately you have no idea.

Thats-What-She-Said Posted: Feb 03, 2010 10:08 AM

Re: FMIL has fallen off the wagon

Ohhh I'm so sorry. Both you and your mother need to stand your ground.

How bout you look at the list, and cut off people you have never met.

Or figure out your guest list, and give her the extra spots, then she has to pay for everyone over. It is your party not hers.

christine2010 Posted: Feb 03, 2010 10:14 AM

Re: FMIL has fallen off the wagon

so sorry your mom is dealing with this.

my mom had to deal with FMIL & issues with my shower too.

lets see where do i start:
1. my mom called FMIL to discuss things with her & they left off that FMIL would call my mom back to let her know some answers, she never called my mom back.
2. FMIL never RSVP'd. my sister had to call & ask her if she was going to go.
3. when my mom called her to find out if people on her side & FHs dads side where attending the party, she said she didn't know.

CarolAnn721 Posted: Feb 03, 2010 10:16 AM

Re: FMIL has fallen off the wagon

AdriandSteve Posted: Feb 03, 2010 10:28 AM

Re: FMIL has fallen off the wagon

mariedsgn Posted: Feb 03, 2010 10:44 AM

Re: FMIL has fallen off the wagon

OMG!!! That is so rude!

FutureCap Posted: Feb 03, 2010 10:45 AM

Re: FMIL has fallen off the wagon

i definitely think you should mention this to FH....

elisa112101 Posted: Feb 03, 2010 10:48 AM

Re: FMIL has fallen off the wagon

Sombody needs to give FMIL a reality check.... either pony up some money or people will just NOT be getting an invite from her list...oops!

WeddingGem Posted: Feb 03, 2010 10:56 AM

Re: FMIL has fallen off the wagon

Posted by FallBride2010

Wow! So she starts the conversation off making it clear she wont pay for anything...but then dominates the guest list?? If I were your mom, I would clearly tell her that allowing her to invite 25(1/2 the people) was very generous and she needs to pay for anyone additional.

ITA. That is rediculous of her!!

Michy2009 Posted: Feb 03, 2010 10:59 AM

Re: FMIL has fallen off the wagon

That is obnoxious! Your mom should tell her since the max number of people they are inviting is 50...her invites are limited to 20...then if you FMIL says, 'why do you get to invite more than me'...you mom should reply....'well I wasnt expecting you to pay, right..so since I am paying.. you get 20 guests'....

queensbride2010 Posted: Feb 03, 2010 11:34 AM

Re: FMIL has fallen off the wagon

Posted by Michy2009

That is obnoxious! Your mom should tell her since the max number of people they are inviting is 50...her invites are limited to 20...then if you FMIL says, 'why do you get to invite more than me'...you mom should reply....'well I wasnt expecting you to pay, right..so since I am paying.. you get 20 guests'....

ITA! And you should definitely tell your FH b/c if FMIL is trying to be that manipulative, i'm sure she will try to complain to your FH and try to look like she's innocent

BriansWifey Posted: Feb 03, 2010 11:41 AM

Re: FMIL has fallen off the wagon

omg thats pretty horrible of your fmil. if fmil was the one throwing the shower it'd be different but thats pretty ballsy of her.

SimHawk8 Posted: Feb 03, 2010 11:52 AM

Re: FMIL has fallen off the wagon

That's not right. I'm sorry to hear that. Unfortunately FMIL can be that way. Mine told my FI why did we pick a Friday and when he told he it would have been my parents 35th anniversary and I wanted to honor my father who passed away with date and hope to have a marriage that literally lasted like my parents until death did them part. She was like it's still inconvenient for out of town guest when realistic she is th only out of town guest. I can only imagine how the shower will go. SMH ... people really need to respect you and your families decisions more.