I do not know what my FMIL's problem is. She definitely doesn't like me. She is so blatantly disrespectful of our relationship. She came to our e-party 2 hours late and hangs out with his ex lately like friends. Meanwhile, if I call, she doesn't call me back. It's like she wants nothing to do with me. It's all very bizarre.
The newest thing is this morning I told her FH bought me a new car and she said 'How can he afford that?' and then walked away from me. Then, I find out she called him and yelled at him about the car. Now mind you, she may know his $ situation but she doesn't know mine. This car is within our means. It's not like he bought me a Bentley. I do not feel that our finances are any of her business, not to mention that FH and I bust our a$$'s at work to make the money that we do. If she's so concerned about our financial situation, maybe she could pitch in a dime for our wedding! I'm so pissed. How dare she?!
I'm very jealous of all of you girls who have great relationships with your FMIL. That's awesome and I only hope that one day I can say the same.
Vent over. Thanks!
mycrayon1
Posted:
Member since
Re: FMIL = PITA
I am so sorry that you have to go through this. I hope that everything will get better over time! I have a decent relationship with my FMIL. Shes a wonderful woman a little crazy at times and does some wierd things regarding our wedding (making demands even though shes not paying), FH life, etc. Shes kind of like the mother on Everybody Loves Raymond only a more nosy!
ETA: the reason I mention it, that you are not alone in the PITA=MIL problem!
Val
Posted:
Member since
Re: FMIL = PITA
Don't be jealous of me hun. My FMIL hates me and her son. She only loves her daughters and has made no secret of it. If you made the money you spend the money. If Fh wants to buy you a small country he can if he wants and FMIL will just have to bite her tongue... off if it comes to it Your money is your buisness (as long as you don' t ask her for financial aide). Ignore her. When she shows up late to places casually look at her, then your watch, and walk away. She'll get the hint. Hope it all works out. Keep us posted
HamptonsBride
Posted:
Member since
Re: FMIL = PITA
Hmmm...sounds like Mom isn't ready to let her baby go...and that is probably why she is acting like a PITA! It probably doesn't have much to do with you personally, but what you represent....which is her baby growing up, moving out and starting a life of his own....she will no longer be the the most important 'woman' in his life...hope it gets better!!
SN2BMRSBURTE
Posted:
Member since
Re: FMIL = PITA
I hope your relationship w/your MIL gets better, my ex's mother still e-mails me, and he just got married! FH knows about it, but I stopped sending her e-mails when I found out he was engaged...I didn't want to cause any probs between her and his hussie Sometimes mom's get attached to the girls their sons date, and it prob makes it harder for them to like a new girl, if that relationship ends for whatever reason. If I were you, I would just try to be civil, she is prob waiting for you to freak out on her, so that you will look bad.....so do the opposite, just stay calm and nice when u are around her
I hope the rest of your planning is going well
kitty1224
Posted:
Member since
Re: FMIL = PITA
Do not be jealous here, my FMIL has issues and no girl is good enough for her sons, She hates me, but to bad for her. It *****, but you play the nice roll and it will kill her. Just be nice, kill her with kindness. You and Fh are starting a new life together and she has no control over that. My FMIL likes to control her kids and now she feels like she is losing her control. Hang in there, and be the better person. if you want to talk FM me.
mrsh2b
Posted:
Member since
Re: FMIL = PITA
Posted by HamptonsBride
Hmmm...sounds like Mom isn't ready to let her baby go...and that is probably why she is acting like a PITA! It probably doesn't have much to do with you personally, but what you represent....which is her baby growing up, moving out and starting a life of his own....she will no longer be the the most important 'woman' in his life...hope it gets better!!
Thank you! The thing is though, he's not a baby...in fact he has his own with a woman from a previous 'relationship' as everyone likes to call it. That's the ex his mom has been hanging out with. Now we can all go and justify the granddaughter thing, blah blah blah but the fact of the matter is the ex is certifiable. She lives to make FH and I as unhappy as she is. FMIL knows that, she didn't like her at all when they were 'together' and yet now, almost 3 years into my relationship with her son she feels so compelled to be buddies with the ex? Well....misery loves company I guess. I'm a happy, optimistic person and I refuse to join the bitter woman club. I really want a good relationship with his mom...it's important to me and it's important to FH. But it has to be a 2-sided effort. I'm so dissappointed with this whole situation. Booooooo!!!!
Mooshyboo
Posted:
Member since
Re: FMIL = PITA
awww i am sorry you are going through this!
OrangeGrl
Posted:
Member since
Re: FMIL = PITA
I know how you feel. We get along ok, but she is WAY older than my parents and she has all these old fashioned ideas. SHe yelled at me the other night because I want to make a cake out of hat boxes for my wedding cards to go in and she told me 'That's not how it goes! You have a special pocketbook that you carry around and put them in there and then your mother sits with the bag all night' I was like 'Um..NO...my mother will be up dancing and socializing!' Crazy woman!
AllJoy
Posted:
Member since
Re: FMIL = PITA
You're entitled to vent! She had no right to question him about the car. I hope he stood up to her and said that its yours & his business. I also am jealous of other people having great relationships with their FIL's. Mine are so COLD and I am nothing but nice to them. His mom is worse. Dress shopping is something that most brides do with their mother, well since I don't have any parents, you would think that his mom would've offered, Nope! (she probably thinks I'd ask her to pay for it) Also, when we got engaged, you'd think they would at least have us over for dinner, or even take us to a dinner. Nope! I've come to realize that people are what they are and you can't change them. His mom doesn't even remember my b'day. (she doesn't even call or send a card, even though she's told about it). Mine is cooky too and CHEAP (at least yours isn't that).
