For those of us that are buying a house

Original post by Munchkn16

Jul 13, 2007 05:21 PM

FH and I had some time to kill, and we started to talk about what those cute little catchphrases on MLSLI really meant. This is what we came up with:

The Real Estate Translator

Cozy - A box
Needs TLC - Needs to be bulldozed and rebuilt
Starter Home – Generally cozy and needs TLC
Great Investment – Needs to be gutted
Quiet Block – Average age of neighbors is in the triple-digits
Oversized Property – Will have to buy a tractor to mow lawn
Freshly Painted – Don’t inhale
Half-Finished Basement – What happened to the other half???
1.5 car garage – You and your spouse can both park if you drive half a car
Newer Roof – Cave-ins imminent
Diamond in the Rough – Great house in a war zone
Great Potential – Eyesore in a great neighborhood
Owner is Motivated – Owner is broke
Open Floorplan – Knocked down all the damn walls
Pool is a Gift – Too lazy to take it down
Commuter’s Dream – Train runs trough backyard
Easy Access to Highway – Front yard doubles as exit ramp
Near Schools – House will be egged on Halloween
Close to Shopping – Can rent out driveway to Christmas shoppers
Potential Mother/Daughter – Scary tenant hiding in basement
In the famed ____ school district – Hopefully you didn’t hear about that time…
Lots of Storage – Plenty of places to hide the bodies

Pencils Posted: Jul 13, 2007 10:13 PM

Re: For those of us that are buying a house

It's quite true. We're still looking (and waiting for the market to really collapse) but we've gone to several open houses in our chosen neighborhood. Some are amazing, I'd LOVE to live there, but are way overpriced. One reminded me of the killer's house in The Silence of the Lambs. The agent kept saying 'he built this house himself'! And we were thinking, 'That's pretty obvious, no professional would build this monstrosity.' It was a bi-level, and the ground floor had room after room that opened up from one another with no hallways. The agent kept saying, 'and this could also be used as a bedroom...' while my husband and I were giving each other horrified looks. The worst was the narrow, two-story room with a window wall and the opposite wall painted black--it was a crude solar heating system, he had automatic blowers funneling the air into the rest of the upstairs. But that room must have been an oven most of the time, and conveniently, as it was the kitchen of the unadvertised illegal accessory apartment. So. Weird!!

Munchkn16 Posted: Jul 14, 2007 05:15 PM

Re: For those of us that are buying a house

Posted by Pencils

It's quite true. We're still looking (and waiting for the market to really collapse) but we've gone to several open houses in our chosen neighborhood. Some are amazing, I'd LOVE to live there, but are way overpriced. One reminded me of the killer's house in The Silence of the Lambs. The agent kept saying 'he built this house himself'! And we were thinking, 'That's pretty obvious, no professional would build this monstrosity.' It was a bi-level, and the ground floor had room after room that opened up from one another with no hallways. The agent kept saying, 'and this could also be used as a bedroom...' while my husband and I were giving each other horrified looks. The worst was the narrow, two-story room with a window wall and the opposite wall painted black--it was a crude solar heating system, he had automatic blowers funneling the air into the rest of the upstairs. But that room must have been an oven most of the time, and conveniently, as it was the kitchen of the unadvertised illegal accessory apartment. So. Weird!!

OMG. That's awful...

We've seen plaid kitchens, walls with baseball-sized holes, stains on floors made by unidentified substances.... But we saw two really great houses today. Keep up hope, your house is out there!!!

GinaBambina08 Posted: Jul 14, 2007 07:43 PM

Re: For those of us that are buying a house

Lol, you should make this a forward

Soon2BeMrsFitzy Posted: Jul 14, 2007 10:18 PM

Re: For those of us that are buying a house

That's Hysterical...and soooo true!!

imaqt314 Posted: Jul 14, 2007 10:38 PM

Re: For those of us that are buying a house

We have just started the search and that list is SO true.....

I love looking at the pictures online and then you go to the house and you wonder what happen, is it the SAME house?

HAPPY HUNTING

cindy104 Posted: Jul 14, 2007 10:46 PM

Re: For those of us that are buying a house

LOL we've been house-hunting for quite some time too (but finally found one this weekend!!), but I have to say that is soooo true!!

AmorPeruano Posted: Jul 14, 2007 11:18 PM

Re: For those of us that are buying a house

Posted by Munchkn16

FH and I had some time to kill, and we started to talk about what those cute little catchphrases on MLSLI really meant. This is what we came up with:

The Real Estate Translator

Cozy - A box
Needs TLC - Needs to be bulldozed and rebuilt
Starter Home – Generally cozy and needs TLC
Great Investment – Needs to be gutted
Quiet Block – Average age of neighbors is in the triple-digits
Oversized Property – Will have to buy a tractor to mow lawn
Freshly Painted – Don’t inhale
Half-Finished Basement – What happened to the other half???
1.5 car garage – You and your spouse can both park if you drive half a car
Newer Roof – Cave-ins imminent
Diamond in the Rough – Great house in a war zone
Great Potential – Eyesore in a great neighborhood
Owner is Motivated – Owner is broke
Open Floorplan – Knocked down all the damn walls
Pool is a Gift – Too lazy to take it down
Commuter’s Dream – Train runs trough backyard
Easy Access to Highway – Front yard doubles as exit ramp
Near Schools – House will be egged on Halloween
Close to Shopping – Can rent out driveway to Christmas shoppers
Potential Mother/Daughter – Scary tenant hiding in basement
In the famed ____ school district – Hopefully you didn’t hear about that time…
Lots of Storage – Plenty of places to hide the bodies