Are you letting them have a choice in the menu?? My step-father is making it seem like he's picking out the menu. I told him we wanted a mainly italian menu but he's talking about spanish food. 90 percent of the guestlist is spanish and eats spanish food EVERYDAY. I wanted a change at the wedding. I dont have a problem with him picking things out little things out for the menu but we want mainly italian. Am I being selfish? Should my parents be able to pick out the whole menu since they paid for the RH?
jennandrolo
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Re: For those whos parents paid for the RH...
I think they should help in deciding but not choose the whooole menu. Its funny cuz us Spanish people eat that food everyday yet theres some of us that must have it at special events too. Like their shocked if they dont see it at weddings, etc. lol. Too satisfy my family at the wedding, our RH has a Latin station for the CH, so we're going to def. get that.
gabbie83
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Re: For those whos parents paid for the RH...
my parents are paying for the RH and they can make suggestions but I think ultimately its going to be our decision.
xXxNovember08xXx
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Re: For those whos parents paid for the RH...
no
my parents are breaking down everything accoring to them and their budget but choices me and FH along with them are making the final decisions.
example now we are doign flowers.... mom is finding 2 florists in our budget... me mom and fh with dad will see what they BOTH have to offer, me and fh put our 2 cents in,and more then likely they will go with our decision.. but this is after they only give us 2 choices....
with the food i see the same thing happening.. we have options and althought they are payig we are gettign a choice
marybp
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Re: For those whos parents paid for the RH...
my parents are paying for the wedding, but they let me choose the food (along with their help). as for the RD, my inlaws are throwing it, and they really made all of the decisions on their own. i would have liked to have a bit more imput, but i didn't want to rock the boat
good luck with it...
bemyyoko
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Re: For those whos parents paid for the RH...
This is a hard question to answer because everyone is different when it comes to money.
My parents are paying for basically my entire wedding, but they said from the very beginning 'here's the money, do what you want with it' I have tried to get their input on a lot of things, but they just tell us to do what we want because it's our wedding.
I think that's amazing of them.
However, I also think since it's their money if they want to have a say in something, they should have the say...
In your situation, if the majority of the guests eat spanish food and are comfortable with it, it might be a good idea to have Spanish food available to them.... I know that a lot of people don't really like to try new things or be different when it comes to food. Other people, love to change it up...
so maybe you can compromise and go 50/50 on the types of food...?
Butterfly123
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Re: For those whos parents paid for the RH...
I wouldnt mind going 50/50 or even having a station during the CH. I love spanish food but I also feel like FH has been left out of the planning. He's had to compromise guest because of our side of the family and the least he could do is get the type of food he wants at his wedding. We will ultimately try and do the 50/50 thing. IM just hoping we dont argue at the RH when picking out the food!
Butterfly123
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Re: For those whos parents paid for the RH...
Posted by jennandrolo
I think they should help in deciding but not choose the whooole menu. Its funny cuz us Spanish people eat that food everyday yet theres some of us that must have it at special events too. Like their shocked if they dont see it at weddings, etc. lol. Too satisfy my family at the wedding, our RH has a Latin station for the CH, so we're going to def. get that.
Exactly! Im gonna do the latin station. But Im sick of every party having spanish food!!! DOnt get me wrong I LOOOOOVE my spanish food but I just wanna switch it up this time. Especially since FH really wants it.
TheFutureMrsM
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Re: For those whos parents paid for the RH...
My dad, and FH's parents are contributing the amount of what the RH would cost. They really havnt said anything about the choices of food. I showed them the menu, and i decide what food goes on the final menu.
Snick n Nick
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My parents are paying for the RH. FH and I will make the decisions for food, but we're bringing both my parents and FH's parents to the tasting with us (it's a private tasting at our RH and they said it wasn't a problem to bring 6 ppl), so we will probably take their input, especially for the cocktail hour where there is a lot to choose!
iwannabmrsD
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Re: For those whos parents paid for the RH...
hey why not tell him.. look dad.. i'd love to have spanish food.. but come on...this isn't authentic spanish food.. this is RECEPTION HALL SPANISH FOOD!!! we don't wanna insult our family.. now do we????
make him think it's not gonna be good enough.. like dad yes it says paella.. but u know that's just some yellow rice with a couple of peppers in it..
if that doesnt work. then go to the meeting and let him talk and then call back and undo everything then on the day of the wedding feign innocence..
cbcf
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Re: For those whos parents paid for the RH...
well neither my parents nor fh's are paying for our wedding...my parents are buying my dress, doj, shoes and throwing my bridal shower. my dad even said he would help pay for the guests he adds on that we dont think we want to invite or can invite due to money but i am sure it wont be alot of peopl prob the most 10 if that.
anyway fh's grandma gave us money for our honeymoon- did she get a choice in where we go NOOOOO WAYYYY haha
but then again this is different than the actual hall i agree allow your parents to have an opinion because they are paying but i think they should stop being a little selfish and see that this is YOUR wedding and you should have a say as well.
I know my FH's parents will have a say in the food etc and they arent contributing a dime!! So good luck to all of us!!!
Butterfly123
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Re: For those whos parents paid for the RH...
Posted by iwannabmrsD
hey why not tell him.. look dad.. i'd love to have spanish food.. but come on...this isn't authentic spanish food.. this is RECEPTION HALL SPANISH FOOD!!! we don't wanna insult our family.. now do we????
make him think it's not gonna be good enough.. like dad yes it says paella.. but u know that's just some yellow rice with a couple of peppers in it..
if that doesnt work. then go to the meeting and let him talk and then call back and undo everything then on the day of the wedding feign innocence..
Thats ANOTHER REASON I dont want spanish food! It SOOO wont be authentic. They specialize in italian. We even tasted their pasta and it was DELICIOUS! Im gonna try reasoning with him that way.
LauraD419
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Re: For those whos parents paid for the RH...
My parents are paying for RH (and a lot of other things). They have made suggestions and we are trying to pick things we know they love...but the decision is mostly ours.
KSquared
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If my parents were paying I would definitly let them pick some of the menu - heck I'd probably let them do whatever they wanted if they were giving me all that money, because it's insane how stressful it is to pay for it on your own.
Mici n KC
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Re: For those whos parents paid for the RH...
Posted by Songstress
I wouldnt mind going 50/50 or even having a station during the CH. I love spanish food but I also feel like FH has been left out of the planning. He's had to compromise guest because of our side of the family and the least he could do is get the type of food he wants at his wedding. We will ultimately try and do the 50/50 thing. IM just hoping we dont argue at the RH when picking out the food!
I think having stations in your CH is a great idea!
DeeluvsVinny
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My parents are paying for the RH, but they've been wonderful. they consider it a gift, so they want our input and fils. Plus we're all italian, and the RH is italian, so that makes it easier.
Sorry you're having issues with this...it will all work out, I'm sure!!
Butterfly123
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Posted by DeeluvsVinny
My parents are paying for the RH, but they've been wonderful. they consider it a gift, so they want our input and fils. Plus we're all italian, and the RH is italian, so that makes it easier.
Sorry you're having issues with this...it will all work out, I'm sure!!
IM grateful that my parents paid for it but I wish they wouldnt make it seem like 'its their wedding too'. That annoys me because theyve both been married more than 1 time! Havent they had enough weddings?!
DeeluvsVinny
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Re: For those whos parents paid for the RH...
Posted by Songstress
Posted by DeeluvsVinny
My parents are paying for the RH, but they've been wonderful. they consider it a gift, so they want our input and fils. Plus we're all italian, and the RH is italian, so that makes it easier.
Sorry you're having issues with this...it will all work out, I'm sure!!
IM grateful that my parents paid for it but I wish they wouldnt make it seem like 'its their wedding too'. That annoys me because theyve both been married more than 1 time! Havent they had enough weddings?!
My favorite line is: 'But, that's what we did at our wedding!'
Umm, Mom? that was 29 years ago..times have changed...
Butterfly123
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Re: For those whos parents paid for the RH...
Posted by DeeluvsVinny
Posted by Songstress
Posted by DeeluvsVinny
My parents are paying for the RH, but they've been wonderful. they consider it a gift, so they want our input and fils. Plus we're all italian, and the RH is italian, so that makes it easier.
Sorry you're having issues with this...it will all work out, I'm sure!!
IM grateful that my parents paid for it but I wish they wouldnt make it seem like 'its their wedding too'. That annoys me because theyve both been married more than 1 time! Havent they had enough weddings?!
My favorite line is: 'But, that's what we did at our wedding!'
Umm, Mom? that was 29 years ago..times have changed...
OMG! My mom kills me when she says that! She says 'IT didnt cost that much when I had my wedding' Of course she's talking about her wedding back in 1975
