FSIL is driving me nuts!

Oct 02, 2006 11:23 AM

FH and I both decided that we would each pick our own Bridesmaids and Groomsmen and would not tell the other who to choose or try to influence each others decision. We each have 7 people each. I picked my sister (MOH), 3 cousins and 3 best friends. FH picked his brother (BM), 3 friends, my brother (who he is very close with) and asked his brother in law (his sister’s husband) and his nephew (his sister’s son) to be groomsmen. We asked his brother in law and nephew at our engagement party back in February who told us that they wanted to think about it and they will get back to us, and that they would let their son who is 15 decide on his own but they wanted to talk to him about first. Ok, fine. Then a few weeks later, in March, FH’s brother in law called him and asked him if his wife (FH’s sister) is going to be a bridesmaid. First, I think that is so rude to have your husband call and ask my FH is she’s in it. You just don’t do that. So he told him, no, that I have a very large family and a lot of first cousins (34) so its important to me that my family and my best friends are my bm and I am not even close with FH’s sister. I’ve never even had a one on one conversation with her before, we are just not that close, we don’t talk to each other, and on top of that she has been very rude to me many times in the past. I just don’t think that she likes me. Anyway, it is now October and we were still waiting for an answer! So FH asked his sister last week if they have an answer and she told us they wanted to talk to us in person about it. So last night we went over to her house and FH’s brother in law told us that he is declining our offer because if his wife is not in it, than he is not going to do it either. So I got pissed and was like, Ok, no offense, but this is OUR wedding. I can’t plan an entire wedding while trying to make everyone else happy. We have to do what makes US happy and it was my own personal decision as to who I want in my bridal party and I don’t think it’s fair for anyone to criticize my decision. So he was like, well, it’s not fair that your sister is in it and so is you brother, but FH’s sister is not in it. So I was like, well, its was FH’s own decision to have my brother as a GM bc they are very close. He made his choices and I made mine, and no offense but FSIL and I are not very close at all and it’s no ones business about decisions for OUR wedding! So then they tell us that they don’t want their son in it either because it’s not fair to their daughter because she’s not in it! What! She is 11 years old and she is not my niece? So why would she be a bridesmaid? She is too young anyway to be a bridesmaid. They are obviously not letting him do it to try and punish us because they are pissed that we didn’t ask FH’s sister! And, we asked their OTHER son, who is 5 to be a ring bearer and she told us No a few months ago, because we asked her oldest son and her youngest son, and again, that wouldn’t be fair to their daughter if both her brothers are in it but not her. Is it just me or is she crazy? So, she basically wants all 5 members of her family to be in my bridal party! And I don’t even have a close relationship with them at all! She doesn’t even seem to like me because she doesn’t even talk to me at family functions! I am so mad...honestly, is it just me, or is she out of her mind?