I mean - healthy doubts, not - oh my god, I'm making a huge mistake type of doubts - just those doubts where you think - everyone starts a marriage all happy and gung ho, whose to say I won't be a divorce statistic?
Sorry - I know - told you it was deep - no flames, just opinions, please...
Also - do you ever start to freak out after an argument with FH?
alioop4282
Posted:
Member since
Re: Getting deep here...
I just freaked out about 5 minutes ago b/c me and FH had an arguement. My dogs ears hurt and I told him he needs to go to the vet and I;m making an appointment for tomorrow night and he told me it could wait till SATURDAY. UM I DON'T THINK SO.
BJandDan
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Re: Getting deep here...
YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And to top it off FH quit smoking two weeks ago so he is super cranky right now. One minute he is freaking out on me, the next apologizing profusely. It is almost comical.
I do think everyone has normal healthy what if moments.
ewickens
Posted:
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Re: Getting deep here...
At first, when we first got engaged, I had lots of doubts. Self doubt about whether he would grow to still love me now that we lived on our own together and relationship doubt when we would fight over who took the garbage out or who did the dishes, etc.
Now - after over a year of living together - I don't have a doubt in the world. I have definitely grown as a person in this last year and in my relationship and I feel like we could last forever!
lipglossjunky73
Posted:
Member since
Re: Getting deep here...
Posted by ewickens
At first, when we first got engaged, I had lots of doubts. Self doubt about whether he would grow to still love me now that we lived on our own together and relationship doubt when we would fight over who took the garbage out or who did the dishes, etc.
Now - after over a year of living together - I don't have a doubt in the world. I have definitely grown as a person in this last year and in my relationship and I feel like we could last forever!
we have been together for over 2 years (it will be almost 3 by the time we get married) and we are best friends- which, as most of our relationships with best friends can go, is someitmes difficult!!!
Mdolph6
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Re: Getting deep here...
As silly as it sounds and as happy as we are right now, I question him from time to time if he will still love me in 10 years. I know I shouldnt but these are some of the things that go through my mind!! We have been together for 3 years next month and we still have that corny new relationship way about us, we are best friends tooo...but I guess with alittle wedding stress right now it may just be normal to have these doubts...LOL
scappy123
Posted:
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Re: Getting deep here...
My only doubt is that i think its going to be a major change living with someone (especially a boy! ) I am 35 and I am afraid its going to be a little hard to share my space sometimes........
VadersBride2006
Posted:
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Re: Getting deep here...
It's like that clip from 'What About Brian'
Guy #1: 'Did you ever have a day where you questioned every decision you ever made?'
Guy #2: 'Yeah, EVERYDAY '
I personally cannot imagine my life w/o FH, maybe b/c we have 3 kids and have lived together for over 2 years. But marriage... it's so... BIG, ya know? It's especially hard when I have everyone and their mothers tell me NOT to marry him!
2Be1
Posted:
Member since
Re: Getting deep here...
Whenever FH and I get into a serious argument I think what the hell am I getting myself into I can't stand him let alone spend the rest of my life with him, but then when we make up I'm like awwwww I love my baby and I can't wait to marry him. These doubts usually come whenever I have PMS.
johnsae
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Re: Getting deep here...
yeah, I have. nothing serious - just trying to be a smart woman by looking at it from all angles. i came to the conclusion that i'm making the right decision, but who is to know what will happen in life?
weddingbunny
Posted:
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Re: Getting deep here...
of course. But they are always fleeting. Usually it's when we've had an argument or occasionally when he's working nights and I miss him and I wonder if he will always work nights, and think how lonely that would be for me. They go away pretty quickly though. I've known he was the one since I was 16, I'm definitely not going to back out now!
ewickens
Posted:
Member since
Re: Getting deep here...
Posted by lipglossjunky73
Posted by ewickens
At first, when we first got engaged, I had lots of doubts. Self doubt about whether he would grow to still love me now that we lived on our own together and relationship doubt when we would fight over who took the garbage out or who did the dishes, etc.
Now - after over a year of living together - I don't have a doubt in the world. I have definitely grown as a person in this last year and in my relationship and I feel like we could last forever!
we have been together for over 2 years (it will be almost 3 by the time we get married) and we are best friends- which, as most of our relationships with best friends can go, is someitmes difficult!!!
That's the same for us Liza! We'll be married just one month shy of 3 years. We have definitely become best friends, and even best friends have differences, but we allow them to help us grow in our relationship and sometimes we have to state 'let's agree to disagree' - we don't need to be the same on everything.
Jackie&Justin
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Re: Getting deep here...
I am sorry, but I don't. We've been together since highschool, we've been through some hard times together including a difficult death in the family, and he is the best friend I could ever ask for. Of course we have arguements and don't agree on everything but I couldn' t imagine my life without him, ever.
ZuzusPetals
Posted:
Member since
Re: Getting deep here...
Posted by ewickens
Posted by lipglossjunky73
Posted by ewickens
At first, when we first got engaged, I had lots of doubts. Self doubt about whether he would grow to still love me now that we lived on our own together and relationship doubt when we would fight over who took the garbage out or who did the dishes, etc.
Now - after over a year of living together - I don't have a doubt in the world. I have definitely grown as a person in this last year and in my relationship and I feel like we could last forever!
we have been together for over 2 years (it will be almost 3 by the time we get married) and we are best friends- which, as most of our relationships with best friends can go, is someitmes difficult!!!
That's the same for us Liza! We'll be married just one month shy of 3 years. We have definitely become best friends, and even best friends have differences, but we allow them to help us grow in our relationship and sometimes we have to state 'let's agree to disagree' - we don't need to be the same on everything.
I feel the same. I have been with FI for 6 years and I love him more than anything. I do have doubts from time to time because marriage is a huge step. I also think its because Im a product of divorce so I cant help to wonder, 'what if...' I think its totally normal to have doubts but when it comes to my gut feeling I believe Im marrying a wonderful man that compliments my life so very well.
But seriously, it can get so hard! lol
roxyvelas
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Member since
Re: Getting deep here...
Living together has helped me a lot also. When we first got engaged I had lots of doubts. I was scared to move out of my house, etc. Since my life has changed more in stages -ex. we moved in together first, its helped me so much. Now I have no doubts.
mrsh2b
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Member since
Re: Getting deep here...
All the freakin time! I think it's nerves though. And thinking about spending the rest of my life related to FH's family!
nov06
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Re: Getting deep here...
Yes. Especially when he does things that get on my nerves a little bit and I wonder - can I handle this for the next 50 years? It doesn't happen all the time but definately once it awhile. It also doesn't help that friends of ours are in the middle of a seperation right now and things don't look so good. It just shows you that anything can happen and it's scary.
CLMon7906
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Re: Getting deep here...
Posted by nov06
Yes. Especially when he does things that get on my nerves a little bit and I wonder - can I handle this for the next 50 years? It doesn't happen all the time but definately once it awhile.QUOTE]
Like putting clothes in front of the hamper instead of IN it, leaving 4 glasses on the nightstand...all from the night before. but then i think of how miserable i'd be without him.....snoring and all.
klingklang77
Posted:
Member since
Re: Getting deep here...
yes. it is normal. i had doubts when i first got engaged. i was like- woah this is such a huge decision, etc.
now, i feel secure, but none the less it is a scary commitment. i think i am more worried about making it into the best marriage it can be. a good marriage is work and that is something that scares me. what if i (or FH) dont put enough into and it fails? what is it going to be like 30 years down the line. stuff like that.
sometimes his habits annoy me and i think, OMG am i going to be able to deal with this?
but i am ready to go into it and my happiness towards our future life together outweighs my 'what if's'.
it is a big step in life, of course one would be crazy not to think 2 times about it.
dreamworld06
Posted:
Member since
Re: Getting deep here...
I guess I can be grateful I'm not alone here. For some stupid reason I thought I was. It's not that I have doubts that we won't be good together I guess I just get scared that he'll change his mind at some point.
