well after being together for a lil more than 8 years surprisingly I still have doubts but I think its healthy. We never really lived together and so I get to question things now and smooth it out before marriage. But noone can really tell what will happen in the future. Thank goodness we still have that 'new relationship feeling' even though we've been together so long.
sarahradio5
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Re: Getting deep here...
Posted by lipglossjunky73
Do you guys have doubts?
I mean - healthy doubts, not - oh my god, I'm making a huge mistake type of doubts - just those doubts where you think - everyone starts a marriage all happy and gung ho, whose to say I won't be a divorce statistic?
Sorry - I know - told you it was deep - no flames, just opinions, please...
Also - do you ever start to freak out after an argument with FH?
Thank you for posting this! I laughed when I read your last line because every stupid, little argument we get in now, I think... OMG what if this doesn't work?? Which is SO STUPID because I can't imagine life WITHOUT him. It's just those heat of the moment times and the stress of everything that messes with us, I think. I'm just happy I'm not the only one. I think there should be a book preparing a bride - not just for booking vendors - but for the EMOTIONAL crap that comes along with being a bride!
Thanks for putting yourself out there and posting this... it makes me feel better that we all go through the same thing.
klingklang77
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Re: Getting deep here...
Posted by sarahradio5 I think there should be a book preparing a bride - not just for booking vendors - but for the EMOTIONAL crap that comes along with being a bride!
i couldnt agree more. like an 'engaged for dummies' book. and with no wedding talk!
stephanielyse
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Re: Getting deep here...
Posted by Mdolph6
As silly as it sounds and as happy as we are right now, I question him from time to time if he will still love me in 10 years. I know I shouldnt but these are some of the things that go through my mind!! We have been together for 3 years next month and we still have that corny new relationship way about us, we are best friends tooo...but I guess with alittle wedding stress right now it may just be normal to have these doubts...LOL
I could have written that. I asked FH the same question the other day, although I believe it was 13 years. I've never been with anyone for a really long time (he and I have been together for just over 2 years and it's my longest relationship) and I get really nervous about it sometimes. We're so happy together, but sometimes I just doubt that it can last, not specifically between him and me, but in general.
dreamworld06
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Re: Getting deep here...
Do you girls ever worry that if you get mad at something that he won't want to be with you? or is it just my stupid brain?
sr081906
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Re: Getting deep here...
WOW.. I never feel that way. I never question or worry about him at all.
OK, honestly, this is the only relationship that I ever felt 'that safe'.
mrsh2b
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Re: Getting deep here...
Posted by nov06
Yes. Especially when he does things that get on my nerves a little bit and I wonder - can I handle this for the next 50 years? It doesn't happen all the time but definately once it awhile. It also doesn't help that friends of ours are in the middle of a seperation right now and things don't look so good. It just shows you that anything can happen and it's scary.
Same here. My FH and I have 3 sets of friends divorcing right now (1 we knew was inevitable) and to watch that is not only sad but its the reality of today which is definitely scary for us soon to be newlyweds. This certainly does not help the 'doubt' issue. Its so hard to anticipate that a seeningly small problem now could become a huge, deal breaking issue later.
july06bride
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Re: Getting deep here...
Yes, I have ...it is the biggest decision I have ever had to make...and although we have been together 6 years (almost) and we have been through ups and downs...I think it is natural to question and wonder about the future especially when so many marriages end in divorce. I love my FH beyond measure and I couldnt imagine my life without him in it!
LaurenluvsTJ
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Re: Getting deep here...
Well this is what I think about: I think that there is no way that FH will ever stop loving each other, we will grow old together. But then I think, isn't that what all the people who get divorced thought when they got married? Then that scares me a litlle bit.
sarahradio5
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Re: Getting deep here...
Posted by dreamworld06
Do you girls ever worry that if you get mad at something that he won't want to be with you? or is it just my stupid brain?
yes... I try to sugarcoat things a little to not 'nag' him. Or at least just pick my battles with him. I find it better to jokingly bring things that bother me up to him... like, 'Hey... Joe! The Milk Carton Plastic Ring Fairy came again and left another one for us!'. Then he makes fun of me for making a corny joke... and then doesn't do it the next time. Humor is so powerful in our relationship, thank God. But for things where humor just doesn't work, I sometimes worry like you. A lot of the wedding stress has caused more arguments than normal lately, especially because he's really doing NOTHING for the wedding. But I'm trying to get past that... We've gotten in some doozy arguments in the past month... and we got past them, so that is really encouraging for the future.
Then there are the days when everything just CLICKS and it all seems perfect. LOVE those days. My FH and I went to the gym together the other day, walked home together in the beautiful Spring weather, went inside and I started cooking dinner and he unloaded the dishwasher, he went to take a shower, and came down when I yelled 'Dinner's Ready' and we sat down to watch the Yankee game. Now THAT is perfect to me. Just think of moments like that when the bad ones pop up... and they do FOR EVERYONE.
bride2b24
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Re: Getting deep here...
you couldnt have said it better.....everytime i hear about a divorce a just cringe....i know i love FH and we are in love ......but life happens! i just hope not to us!
lipglossjunky73
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Re: Getting deep here...
Posted by vixchik
Posted by nov06
Like putting clothes in front of the hamper instead of IN it, leaving 4 glasses on the nightstand...all from the night before. but then i think of how miserable i'd be without him.....snoring and all.
