Okay both of FH's cousins from VA are GM. It has seriously been a struggle for months to get them to get measured so we can leave a deposit on their tux for them. The youngest finally got measured about 2 weeks ago and gave us the measurements. The other supposedly got measure last weekend and said he would email us the measurements. Its been almost a week and nothing. Hes been the most difficult one considering he wasnt exactly sure what a groomsman was at first lol We also dont know when hes driving up to NY and if he'll even make it to the rehearsal lunch. On top of that he isnt exactly Mr. Personality.
Since my BM dropped out last week, my bp is uneven. Im leaning towards asking this GM to step down because hes slacking big time.
What would you do?
UPDATE: FH just spoke to him and explained everything that he would have to do as a GM then gave him a choice. He decided to drop out. FH said he was actually happy about it. He didnt want to wear a tux or do any of that.
jeanyus27
Posted:
Member since
Re: GM Concern..advice?
Wow, i really don't know what i would do. Its so close to the wedding, do you think it would hurt his feelings? Maybe tell him that if he doens't get the measurements to you asap, then he's out. If he doens't really want to be it then maybe he'll step down. But i would give him a chance.
jennandrolo
Posted:
Member since
Re: GM Concern..advice?
Posted by jeanyus27
Wow, i really don't know what i would do. Its so close to the wedding, do you think it would hurt his feelings? Maybe tell him that if he doens't get the measurements to you asap, then he's out. If he doens't really want to be it then maybe he'll step down. But i would give him a chance.
im not exactly sure if he would be hurt. i dont think he was exactly clear on what a GM is to be honest lol. we told him we would need his measurements to get him a tux and he said why? i have a suit. then he asked if i would need his wifes measurements too to get her a dress lol
bluegreen08
Posted:
Member since
Re: GM Concern..advice?
give him an ultimatum?
FH gave his family/groomsmen the tux info in November and asked them to get their measurements in by March. He called and followed up again when nobody had anything in by mid March, and they all did except for his 2 brothers (best men!) and his grandfathers.
His brothers kept saying 'we're going today' and never did... and now it's the end of April. I got really mad about it because this takes 5 minutes, but FH doesn't think it's a big deal and the tux place says we still have time. I wouldn't be surprised if we hit the one-month-mark like you and his brothers still have not been measured.
Tell him it's important, and give him a deadline. if he doesnt have his measurements in, he's out. the end.
jeanyus27
Posted:
Member since
Re: GM Concern..advice?
Posted by jennandrolo
Posted by jeanyus27
Wow, i really don't know what i would do. Its so close to the wedding, do you think it would hurt his feelings? Maybe tell him that if he doens't get the measurements to you asap, then he's out. If he doens't really want to be it then maybe he'll step down. But i would give him a chance.
im not exactly sure if he would be hurt. i dont think he was exactly clear on what a GM is to be honest lol. we told him we would need his measurements to get him a tux and he said why? i have a suit. then he asked if i would need his wifes measurements too to get her a dress lol
he really is clueless! maybe if you explain to him that you had a BM drop out and that it would just be easier to have an even number. He would probably be fine with it. What does your fh think?
Cutechef729
Posted:
Member since
Re: GM Concern..advice?
I would call him and ask him again for the measurements. Chance are he forgot. If he doesn't get back to you by the end of the weekend I say have FH talk to him and find out if he really wants to be in the wedding party. I wouldn't just kick him out right away. Good luck!!! I just realized that today is your 1 month mark!!!!
jennandrolo
Posted:
Member since
Re: GM Concern..advice?
Posted by bluegreen08
give him an ultimatum?
FH gave his family/groomsmen the tux info in November and asked them to get their measurements in by March. He called and followed up again when nobody had anything in by mid March, and they all did except for his 2 brothers (best men!) and his grandfathers.
His brothers kept saying 'we're going today' and never did... and now it's the end of April. I got really mad about it because this takes 5 minutes, but FH doesn't think it's a big deal and the tux place says we still have time. I wouldn't be surprised if we hit the under-a-month-mark like you and his brothers still have not been measured.
Unfortunately I cant give them an ultimatum because they are his brothers. It just annoys me that they haven't done anything this entire process, including coming to our e-party, sending us a congrats card, helping with planning anything, FH essentially planned his b-party and they cant even get measured for their tuxes?
omg fh's cousins acted like going to get measured was going to be a mission impossible. they thought you couldnt just walk into a tux place and get measured without actually renting a tux. it took me weeks to convince them they can.
TrueLoveIn2008
Posted:
Member since
Re: GM Concern..advice?
Posted by jennandrolo
Posted by jeanyus27
Wow, i really don't know what i would do. Its so close to the wedding, do you think it would hurt his feelings? Maybe tell him that if he doens't get the measurements to you asap, then he's out. If he doens't really want to be it then maybe he'll step down. But i would give him a chance.
im not exactly sure if he would be hurt. i dont think he was exactly clear on what a GM is to be honest lol. we told him we would need his measurements to get him a tux and he said why? i have a suit. then he asked if i would need his wifes measurements too to get her a dress lol
weird how someone can not know what being in a BP is about - a 15 yo I could understand, but this guy is Married .... how do you get to be in your mid to late 20s, or older, and not know about this stuff???
but i digress...
I would tell him nicely you need the measurements ASAP and if he can't get them to you by the end of the weekend, he won't have the tux in time and he won't be able to be in the wedding.
jennandrolo
Posted:
Member since
Re: GM Concern..advice?
Posted by jeanyus27
Posted by jennandrolo
Posted by jeanyus27
Wow, i really don't know what i would do. Its so close to the wedding, do you think it would hurt his feelings? Maybe tell him that if he doens't get the measurements to you asap, then he's out. If he doens't really want to be it then maybe he'll step down. But i would give him a chance.
im not exactly sure if he would be hurt. i dont think he was exactly clear on what a GM is to be honest lol. we told him we would need his measurements to get him a tux and he said why? i have a suit. then he asked if i would need his wifes measurements too to get her a dress lol
he really is clueless! maybe if you explain to him that you had a BM drop out and that it would just be easier to have an even number. He would probably be fine with it. What does your fh think?
fh has been saying for a while now that he wants to drop him but he wants to give him more time. more time was okay a few weeks ago but now we're a month away.
on top of that im also afraid he wont make it to ny for the rehearsal lunch so on the wedding day hes going to be even more clueless. plus hes coming up with his wife and new baby and i dont think hes aware of the fact that he wont really be around them the whole day.
jennandrolo
Posted:
Member since
Re: GM Concern..advice?
Posted by JBoothIn2008
Posted by jennandrolo
Posted by jeanyus27
Wow, i really don't know what i would do. Its so close to the wedding, do you think it would hurt his feelings? Maybe tell him that if he doens't get the measurements to you asap, then he's out. If he doens't really want to be it then maybe he'll step down. But i would give him a chance.
im not exactly sure if he would be hurt. i dont think he was exactly clear on what a GM is to be honest lol. we told him we would need his measurements to get him a tux and he said why? i have a suit. then he asked if i would need his wifes measurements too to get her a dress lol
weird how someone can not know what being in a BP is about - a 15 yo I could understand, but this guy is Married .... how do you get to be in your mid to late 20s, or older, and not know about this stuff???
but i digress...
I would tell him nicely you need the measurements ASAP and if he can't get them to you by the end of the weekend, he won't have the tux in time and he won't be able to be in the wedding.
he had a city hall type wedding and i dont think anyone in fh's family has really had a big wedding.
jeanyus27
Posted:
Member since
Re: GM Concern..advice?
Posted by jennandrolo
Posted by jeanyus27
Posted by jennandrolo
Posted by jeanyus27
Wow, i really don't know what i would do. Its so close to the wedding, do you think it would hurt his feelings? Maybe tell him that if he doens't get the measurements to you asap, then he's out. If he doens't really want to be it then maybe he'll step down. But i would give him a chance.
im not exactly sure if he would be hurt. i dont think he was exactly clear on what a GM is to be honest lol. we told him we would need his measurements to get him a tux and he said why? i have a suit. then he asked if i would need his wifes measurements too to get her a dress lol
he really is clueless! maybe if you explain to him that you had a BM drop out and that it would just be easier to have an even number. He would probably be fine with it. What does your fh think?
fh has been saying for a while now that he wants to drop him but he wants to give him more time. more time was okay a few weeks ago but now we're a month away.
on top of that im also afraid he wont make it to ny for the rehearsal lunch so on the wedding day hes going to be even more clueless. plus hes coming up with his wife and new baby and i dont think hes aware of the fact that he wont really be around them the whole day.
sounds like it would probably be easier for you and this GM for him to step down. I would have fh explain it to him. You need people that can devote extra time to you that day and at the rehearsal and it doesn't sound like he can do it right now. Especially with a new baby. I'm sure he'll understand!
jennandrolo
Posted:
Member since
Re: GM Concern..advice?
Posted by jeanyus27
Posted by jennandrolo
Posted by jeanyus27
Posted by jennandrolo
Posted by jeanyus27
Wow, i really don't know what i would do. Its so close to the wedding, do you think it would hurt his feelings? Maybe tell him that if he doens't get the measurements to you asap, then he's out. If he doens't really want to be it then maybe he'll step down. But i would give him a chance.
im not exactly sure if he would be hurt. i dont think he was exactly clear on what a GM is to be honest lol. we told him we would need his measurements to get him a tux and he said why? i have a suit. then he asked if i would need his wifes measurements too to get her a dress lol
he really is clueless! maybe if you explain to him that you had a BM drop out and that it would just be easier to have an even number. He would probably be fine with it. What does your fh think?
fh has been saying for a while now that he wants to drop him but he wants to give him more time. more time was okay a few weeks ago but now we're a month away.
on top of that im also afraid he wont make it to ny for the rehearsal lunch so on the wedding day hes going to be even more clueless. plus hes coming up with his wife and new baby and i dont think hes aware of the fact that he wont really be around them the whole day.
sounds like it would probably be easier for you and this GM for him to step down. I would have fh explain it to him. You need people that can devote extra time to you that day and at the rehearsal and it doesn't sound like he can do it right now. Especially with a new baby. I'm sure he'll understand!
