Ok please someone help me on this. Im getting married (obviously) well my uncle has been so much a part of my life he's been like the father i've never had (my father died when i was a baby) he's raised me as his daughter (he has no kids) he is also my Godfather. I love him dearly he has done more than i could ever repay. So anyway my grandfather my moms dad has not been very much a part of my life. We talk but usually the only time he helps is to give me money he never took me out or spent time with me to get to know me. SO anyway the discussion of who was walking me down the aisle came up and i asked my godfather if we would do the honor of course he accepted. My grandfather was not pleased he seems to feel that although thats his son and he has done more for me he should be the one to walk me. Personally i don't want my g-father to walk me only my uncle. I dont want to cause an either further strain between me and my grandfather but i really want to give this honor to my uncle/godfather please help.
WedHead
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Re: Godfather or Grandfather? whos more important
I def. think that is YOUR decision and if you consider your godfather to be the person best suited for the job, then he is.
armybride2be
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thank you i just feel so guilty i know i shouldnt but people have ways of guiltripping brides
girlygrl33
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Oh boy thats tuff!!! Can you have both walk you down? Ive seen that before, where the bride has her dad and stepdad walk her down. I know your uncle has been there more and you want him, but its your grandpa? you said he was only around to give you money and HE never took the time to get to know you- did you take the time to get to know him? He sounds like he was there for you when you needed money- hence HIM- you needed him for the money and knows more about whats going on with you that he knew you needed money? But you also sound like you made your choice- you said you DONT want your grandpa to walk you down. I think you should have really thought about this before you asked your uncle cause for you to post this means you are uncertain you made the right decision. To answer your question who is more important- they both are but I think grandpa would be more important. JMO
armybride2be
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its a lot more confusing then what i just said. i really dont want him to walk me down i just feel guilty and the only time he gave me money was my birthday and christmas and ive made numerous attempts to get to know him ive called emailed wrote faxed and went in person to his home and he never pursued really wanting to spend anytime with me
babybug631
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It sounds like you really want your uncle to do it. So I would choose him. Your grandfather should understand your decision, but as I've learned, weird things happen when you plan a wedding. Just explain to him that you love him very much as your grandfather. But you have always looked at your uncle as if he were your second father, and you want to give him the honor of giving you away, something that most likely he will never have the chance to do again. Hopefully he will respect your wishes and let it go. Good luck.
WedHead
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Re: Godfather or Grandfather? whos more important
If you want to split the task, you can have Grandpa walk you halfway up and then have your godfather escort you the rest of the way to your groom, or vis-versa.
girlygrl33
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Re: Godfather or Grandfather? whos more important
Posted by armybride2be
its a lot more confusing then what i just said. i really dont want him to walk me down i just feel guilty and the only time he gave me money was my birthday and christmas and ive made numerous attempts to get to know him ive called emailed wrote faxed and went in person to his home and he never pursued really wanting to spend anytime with me
I figured there was more to the story- dont feel guilty, you went with the right decision. whats making you feel guilty if you really dont know him, just the fact that hes grandpa? or did someone say something?
lindz
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what if you gave grandpa another special job?
armybride2be
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i was thinking of having him do a special reading or maybe a a grandpa granddaugter dance wat do u think?
SomethingBlu
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It stinks that your grandpa's feelings are hurt, but honestly people's feelings get hurt when planning. You can't please everyone. I would choose the one you feel is most 'dad like' to you. That sounds like your uncle. Go with that choice and explain to him that it's his son too and you're still honoring that side of the family... Does your mom have an opinion?
Good luck!
SomethingBlu
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Posted by armybride2be
i was thinking of having him do a special reading or maybe a a grandpa granddaugter dance wat do u think?
The dance and the reading sound very special, that way he gets honored at the ceremony AND the reception.
babybug631
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Re: Godfather or Grandfather? whos more important
Posted by armybride2be
i was thinking of having him do a special reading or maybe a a grandpa granddaugter dance wat do u think?
That would be nice. I like the reading idea. The dance would be sweet. Are you going to dance with your uncle too?
armybride2be
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yes im going to have a dance with my uncle to he is also my godfather. oh and my mom says go with her borther my uncle/godfather. because my grandpa wasnt there for them much either
armybride2be
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thank you very much though ladies for all the great advice you were very prompt i appreciate it so much
girlygrl33
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YES the DANCE def!!!!!!! A reading he may get flustered up there and not everyone goes to the church but to waltz around with his granddaughter!! DEF do that!
armybride2be
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thanks girly ill talk to him tommorow i love this website
girlygrl33
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Posted by armybride2be
thanks girly ill talk to him tommorow i love this website
Your welcome
Preshy7
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Re: Godfather or Grandfather? whos more important
Posted by armybride2be
Personally i don't want my g-father to walk me only my uncle. I dont want to cause an either further strain between me and my grandfather but i really want to give this honor to my uncle/godfather please help.
you said it right there- have your uncle do it! your grandfather will understand!
oakslady
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go with your godfather - it should be someone you feel close to my uncle walked me - i didnt choose my deadbeat father because he means nothing to me - so dont listen to what family says do what is right for you
