Ok please someone help me on this. Im getting married (obviously) well my uncle has been so much a part of my life he's been like the father i've never had (my father died when i was a baby) he's raised me as his daughter (he has no kids) he is also my Godfather. I love him dearly he has done more than i could ever repay. So anyway my grandfather my moms dad has not been very much a part of my life. We talk but usually the only time he helps is to give me money he never took me out or spent time with me to get to know me. SO anyway the discussion of who was walking me down the aisle came up and i asked my godfather if we would do the honor of course he accepted. My grandfather was not pleased he seems to feel that although thats his son and he has done more for me he should be the one to walk me. Personally i don't want my g-father to walk me only my uncle. I dont want to cause an either further strain between me and my grandfather but i really want to give this honor to my uncle/godfather please help.
mka06
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Re: Godfather or Grandfather? whos more important
go with who you want, esp if your mom is in your corner!
doing something else to honor your grandpa would be very nice of you, and very big. if he's not happy with a reading or dance, whichever you choose, that's his issue not yours.
BriBri529
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Re: Godfather or Grandfather? whos more important
There should be no problem here- your godfather is who you chose- that is it- it is very unfair of your Grandfather to make you feel that way IMO
jimmysgrl
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Re: Godfather or Grandfather? whos more important
Oh, I'm sorry that your grandfather's feelings were hurt but I definitely would stick with your godfather. Your grandfather may just regret that he didn't do more for you and is acting like this because of that. Please have your godfather walk you down because it's such a memorable moment, you want to share it with the man that has been with you all the way.
JennJay
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Re: Godfather or Grandfather? whos more important
I know that must be a really tough decission. What if you had your mom walks you down instead? That way you wouldnt really have to make the decision,and you can have both your uncle and grandfather do a reading. But if you had to choose, it sounds like your uncle has been your father figure. And, he is your Godfather.... the person who is supposed to step in for one of your parents if something should happen. People often try to make your wedding the way they want, but remember, you are only going to get this opportunity once. I also think the grandfather/daughter dance is a really nice idea.
suven
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Re: Godfather or Grandfather? whos more important
I'm thinking in terms of the way my father raised me- financial support but ZERO emotional support. And, then when I brought this to his attention when I became and adult he FREAKED out.
Most of these 'old timers' were taught that to be a 'father' meant to go to work, earn a living, and provide financially while Mom stayed home and did the nurturing.
I think your grandfather is probably VERY shocked because he probably thinks your relationship with him is perfect and doesn't lack a thing.
I'd reevaluate the situation. You might not like the 'look' of 2 men walking a bride down the aisle, but believe me when I tell you, that type of detail will fade away. Your relationship may suffer if you don't include your grandfather. I suggest having both walk you down the aisle.
Mayflower
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Re: Godfather or Grandfather? whos more important
Posted by SomethingBlu
Posted by armybride2be
i was thinking of having him do a special reading or maybe a a grandpa granddaugter dance wat do u think?
The dance and the reading sound very special, that way he gets honored at the ceremony AND the reception.
I agree! This way, your grandfather gets special recognition and you still get to have your godfather/uncle walk you down the aisle.
susan624
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Re: Godfather or Grandfather? whos more important
I think having a special dance would be nice.
kaklesmay
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Re: Godfather or Grandfather? whos more important
My sis had this prob. My father left when we were young. So, she was raised by her 'father figure'. She told my real dad that he wouldnt be giving her away b/c he didnt have the right to. So, he didnt even come to the wedding and was/is very hurt.
But she wouldnt change a thing to this day b/c she stuck with her true feelings.
Go w/ your godfather if he was more of a father figure. Your grandpa may not like it but he should've been more a part of your life if this is so important to him. JMO
