I told FMIL and my mom 100 people but am i including guests in that number because she will think she can invite 100 people and turn into 200 and i dont want that.
If i am saying 100 total with guest she is goign to tell me she has way more then that. what should i do give them 120 each then? thats including guests?
I dont know what to do and this is beyond stressing me out and im not getting married until next year. but i need to set a limit now before she gets anymore ideas. She told me she has a lot of friends and i said your allowed 100 people and thats it!!!!!!!!!!!
I dont want to fight with them at all but i need to make my point but i dont want to say it wrong.
Help!!!!!!!!!
4Everhisgirl
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I feel your pain! I have to guarantee 175 and I received a list from my FMIL with 160 people on it!! That's not even including any of my friends and family! She said that she really 'HAS' to invite all 160 people and that if we go over our 175 she will pay for the difference...so I said fine by me!
pixietina
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This is your day and it should be about the people that you want there. I don't understand what is up with parents wanting to invite a million people. If they want to bring alot of people then they can pay for it.
KristyANDMatt224
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ugh I'm sorry hun... Similarly, but not as extreme, FIL have about 10 people on list that we didn't have (we already put fam and friends) but FH doesn't know these people and doesnt want them on list. I dont care at all; what's 1 table out of 25 or so to us, if it means that much for his family to have them there. But FH refuses to add them bc he has been cutting his own friends and doesn't want total strangers in their place. I get it, but it's a crappy situation. Maybe FH can talk to his mom and explain that the number is higher than you both wanted. Also, if you and FH are paying for the wedding, that can be a strong point too. What does FH say about it?
Bride2Be78
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Posted by pixietina
This is your day and it should be about the people that you want there. I don't understand what is up with parents wanting to invite a million people. If they want to bring alot of people then they can pay for it.
ITA!!
I was told to invite certain people that I could care less if they come to my wedding but its more of a courtesy so I'm hoping they don't show up LOL
jassy119
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Posted by pixietina
This is your day and it should be about the people that you want there. I don't understand what is up with parents wanting to invite a million people. If they want to bring alot of people then they can pay for it.
ITA! I dont get parents either that do this. They treat the wedding like its their party. They want all the extra ppl to come then they should pay.
pjc92980
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Posted by pixietina
This is your day and it should be about the people that you want there. I don't understand what is up with parents wanting to invite a million people. If they want to bring alot of people then they can pay for it.
ITA agree with this and just so you have an idea...we guaranteed 200 people also. We invited 282 people and ended up with 203
JenniBella
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Posted by pixietina
This is your day and it should be about the people that you want there. I don't understand what is up with parents wanting to invite a million people. If they want to bring alot of people then they can pay for it.
Exactly!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I totally agree and I totally will tell her to Pay but her first son went through this and didnt pay for the extras So Boy am I in for it!
Thank you!
JenniBella
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Posted by KristyANDMatt224
ugh I'm sorry hun... Similarly, but not as extreme, FIL have about 10 people on list that we didn't have (we already put fam and friends) but FH doesn't know these people and doesnt want them on list. I dont care at all; what's 1 table out of 25 or so to us, if it means that much for his family to have them there. But FH refuses to add them bc he has been cutting his own friends and doesn't want total strangers in their place. I get it, but it's a crappy situation. Maybe FH can talk to his mom and explain that the number is higher than you both wanted. Also, if you and FH are paying for the wedding, that can be a strong point too. What does FH say about it?
He says that he will take care of it and but keeps saying we need to make sure we have 200 people or we have to pay for people who arent there. So I said I will have to invite 250-260. If i go over 20 people Im fine with I just dont want her to get her damn way !!!!!!!!
stormstryker
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I know this feeling!!!! We have a 200 min also. My parents wanted to invite all these distant relatives that I never met before in my life (or if I did it was for like 10 mins). And truth be told, this is the only reason we went with this deal with the 200 min cause of my mom and her insistance of inviting these people. Unfortunately they are helping us pay for the day, so I can only complain so much! Needless to say, I feel your pain.
teacherteacher
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Oh No! I watched my two sisters go through this same scenario, so when we got engaged, I preemptively let my mom know that I included her 'usual suspects' of friends already on my idea of a guest list.
She seemed to accept that pretty easily, and the other day when she called with ONE LAST couple to add, I told her these were the last two and she agreed.
I feel a little bad about it, but I really want to a) stick to a small wedding and b) enjoy the people who are there while still getting a chance to eat and enjoy my day. Plus, if someone's side of the family is bigger than the other, you can always explain it's not fair to invite 120 amount of people if they only have 100 or something...whatever you do, make sure it will lead to you being the happiest you could be at your wedding!
