Has anyone...

had any huge family issues with their wedding and feel like you have to make everyone else happy? Without going into detail (I could write a book), both sides of FH and mine families are having MAJOR issues with the invite list, and the fact that we aren't having children at our wedding (we had kids at the E-Party, which was a disaster, and was the nail in the coffin as to why we decided not to invited kids to our black tie wedding). It just really s*cks and it is to the point that FH and I just can't wait for the day to be over with....

Thanks girls for listening/reading

It's true what they say... weddings and funerals bring out the absolute worst in people.
Edited for typos.

I've had problems with the no kids rule from FH's family. They are mad we aren't allowing his sisters 2 daughters at the wedding, but this is something we decided on a long time ago, and we made it clear that its not up for discussion. I didn't make it sound like it was a money issue to them, because even if FIL's offered to pay we still wouldn't have his neices there. I love kids, I'm a full time nanny, but I need one event in my life that is child free, lol

I can't tell you enough how much I can relate to your post! Well actually.. more my family and not FH,

Keep your head up and plan your wedding as you would like. In the end, the day is about you and him right??

I know it's tough though. If you ever need to vent FM me!

yes on our end its the same problem except its also FH family is larger and we are splitting the guestlist 50/50. Somehow FH family wants to cut out some of MY family members to be able to invite more of theirs. Its really upsetting and everytime someone brings up the fact that we forgot to add someone, I go into bridezilla mode and i catch a serious attitude!
FH and I are paying for it and weve told people that we cannot accomodate evry1 and ppl will be left out. At this point i can give 2 sh*ts.

Seriously I will rip someone apart if they bring it up again!

We're starting to have some issues now that the invites are out. The only children that are invited to the wedding are FH's son, Neice and my cousin's 2 kids, and all 4 are in the wedding party.
We only invited FH's 1st cousins. Almost all of his first cousins are married and have kids. The majority of them are ages 2-14. There are 4 that are over 18. While I would love to invite them, it would start a HUGE war in FH's family. All the other cousins will want to know why can't they bring their kids. But then there would be a good 40 kids on FH's side alone, then we'd have to invite my side's kids, so we'd be loooking at maybe 75 or more kids. And I like kids, but not that much. So I stopped at the 1st cousin generation.
But now we hear that One of his cousin's is demanding to know why her 2 adult children are not invited. She hasn't said anything to us yet, just FSIL and FMIL and I'm not sure they understand the reason why I stopped. So I'm just waiting to get the response card back and see what it says. Then, if she comes to my shower, I'll mention something. SHe's a nice person, so I'm sure once she knows the reason, she'll be ok with it.
I've conceded alot when it comes to this wedding, and I am not conceding anymore. I'm paying for it, so that's it. Good luck. You're not alone.

I'm assuming you're going through the dreaded 'no kids at the reception' drama..

so am i!

its been an ongoing fight with FMIL.. she just doesn't understand that NO kids means NO kids! (except BP)... she thinks that NO kids translates to no kids with the exception of cousins and children of extended relatives from europe, who we've never met.

just put your foot down.. thats what we keep doing. the answer is NO and will be NO. come the day of, if there are children at my wedding, that I did not want there, they'd better be on their best behavior or EVERYONE involved will have to deal with a RAGING me!

We are def having issues....not w/kids but w/everything else you could imagine. My parents are paying for the wedding so there really isnt much I can say but it is exhausting since they are both control freaks and FMIL has control issues too. Just keep in mind that at the end of the day it really is all about you and FH. Maybe you can take sometime and just make a mental list of why you want to marry FH and the things he does that makes you love him so much. This might help lighten your thoughts and bring some of the excitement back for you.

HTH!

Your Day...Your way. If you don't want kiddies there, and it is black tie, then ppl can step up and hire a sitter. That simple and it shouldn't be your problem. You made the decision, they need to deal with it. Sorry they are stressing you out.

Awww Alana I'm so sorry!!! You are such a sweetie!! You just do what YOU want to do and tough titties to everyone else...people need to learn boundaries, especially family, so start setting them NOW...I can't believe how families can act when it comes to a wedding

Thanks again Ladies....I really appreciate your support!!! The whole thing really just s*cks - but, we will get through it one way or another!!!

For those who are going through similiar things - we'll get through it!

In the end, FH and I are trying to keep in mind that it is our special day - although, I have to admit, sometimes it is tough after all this invite drama...