Have you and FH...

Original post by tammi2308

Oct 23, 2008 02:08 PM

talked about who would stay home once you start a family?? With us, it would be me. Fh makes a lot more than I do salary wise. I went to school and paid a lot of money for my education, even masters degree. I have a good job and make my own money, even though I feel like I could always make more...lol. I would love to be able to raise our children. Plus, I dont have a big family and neither does FH. So, if one of us didn't stay home, daycare would be the only option and I would hate for daycare to raise our children. So, how many of you would be stay at home mom's?? or plan on it?? even though you may have great job's now or invested a lot of $$ for your education??

VickiR510 Posted: Oct 23, 2008 03:47 PM

Re: Have you and FH...

Well this has been discussed. Its hard because we are both at a point in our careers where we are both doing very well. however, he needs to have 20 yrs or his pension & since accounting never realy changes i could laway sgo back. But honesty, thank goodness for my mom & FMIL because they both want to watch our child while we are at work. because i really dont want to leave my job just yet. maybe after child number 2.

ttdiff11 Posted: Oct 23, 2008 03:49 PM

Re: Have you and FH...

i reallyy hope i will only have to work part time at the most bc it will be sooo hard for me to leave a child. when i moved out, i cried bc i missed my dog! i cant imagine leaving a baby everyday with a babysitter! lol.

tammi2308 Posted: Oct 23, 2008 03:53 PM

Re: Have you and FH...

I hear you on that! When my sister told me she was going to have to leave my nephew with a babysitter to go back to work, I was really sad. I was asking tons of questions about the babysitter and was always wondering if he was being treated good and taken care of well.....I'm not even a mom yet! haha

Kristina2009 Posted: Oct 23, 2008 03:57 PM

Re: Have you and FH...

We will both keep working. Both of us have been at our careers for a while. I spent a lot of time in school and I enjoy what I do. In the perfect world I would stay as home and work part time but that is not the kind of industry I am in. We plan to juggle two careers and children and, because we don't have parents who can watch our children, we will have to find childcare and I am ok with that. I don't thing he would want the pressure of supporting a family alone as my field is generally more profitable. Regardless, though, I really believe you can have it all - and it is anything but easy!

+++++++
I grew up in a family where my father worked insane hours to provide for his family. It is not easy and today his health is suffering for that. I think the pressure to provide can be very difficult for one person, especially when you are used to a certain level of comfort.

lanamanitta Posted: Oct 23, 2008 04:21 PM

Re: Have you and FH...

Unfortunately, neither one of us, but owning my firm I have flexibility. I can work from home as much as possible, without dropping the ball on my partners, and my fiance has off one day a week during the week, so we'll juggle around that. Other than that, we'll need some help!!! I hope we can afford a nanny, but we'll see!!

flairforfashion Posted: Oct 23, 2008 04:37 PM

Re: Have you and FH...

Posted by Kristina2009
I grew up in a family where my father worked insane hours to provide for his family. It is not easy and today his health is suffering for that. I think the pressure to provide can be very difficult for one person, especially when you are used to a certain level of comfort.

I hear you on this- my Father worked and provided for the whole family while Mom raised us. It was nice and we were comfortable BUT at the same time, I think it's fair if both parents work for various reasons.

kgicrls Posted: Oct 23, 2008 04:37 PM

Re: Have you and FH...

I definately will be the one staying home when we have babies!!!

Nuvia97 Posted: Oct 23, 2008 05:01 PM

Re: Have you and FH...

Def me. FH makes so much more than me plus I am planning on going back to grad school to I will stop working once I get accepted anyway.

FH works nights so even if I wanted to work we may be able to still work something out since he doesnt work the regular 9-5 (good and bad thing at times)

Mich2585 Posted: Oct 23, 2008 05:19 PM

Re: Have you and FH...

Posted by Jsquared279

I want to stay home and FH is praying he will be making enough money to support us by then.

im with you!!!

IrishBrideASmiling Posted: Oct 23, 2008 05:27 PM

Re: Have you and FH...

We discussed this too and when FH had a job and before this economy went south, we agreed that I would stay home.

Since FH lost his job and times are tough, the reality seems like we both will have to work. If I could choose, I would stay home until the kids were in school and I would get a part time job.

LeeAnne Posted: Oct 23, 2008 05:30 PM

Re: Have you and FH...

we are both going to work. i worked way too hard and paid to much money to get where i am. plus i LOVE my job and would probably go crazy at home all day.

kristentinnelly Posted: Oct 23, 2008 05:32 PM

Re: Have you and FH...

FH and I discussed me working from home since I can take over my dads business and work out of the house. This way we dont have to pay for daycare and we still have 2 incomes rolling in

Im a Pepper Posted: Oct 23, 2008 05:34 PM

Re: Have you and FH...

I'd probably be the one to stay home. At that time I'll be well into my nursing career and I'll have more flexibility with my hours. Also, FH makes more so it makes sense that I stay home.

coldasice217 Posted: Oct 23, 2008 07:42 PM

Re: Have you and FH...

In a perfect world, I'd stay home with the family and he would work, but I don't think realistically it's possible. His mother has said that she'll watch the kids if I want or need to go back to work, and my mother wants no part of it. When I was growing up my father sometimes worked three jobs so that my mother could raise us, and it appears FH is unwilling to make those same sacrifices. It's really not fair, considering he had the luxury of having his mother raise him at home as well.

xosweetiexo Posted: Oct 23, 2008 08:36 PM

Re: Have you and FH...

My FH wants to stay home and be the house mom LOL

PROBM Posted: Oct 23, 2008 09:27 PM

Re: Have you and FH...

we will both work and the kiddies will be watched by grandparents, friends and family, unless we win lotto

CandB4604 Posted: Oct 23, 2008 10:02 PM

Re: Have you and FH...

It's such a hard decision. I went to a very expensive college and my parents didn't take out loans or anything - they just paid for it but in the end, I'll be the one staying home. (Can't wait- hope our kid looks like a perfect mix between me and FH, heehe)

LnF0405 Posted: Oct 23, 2008 10:05 PM

Re: Have you and FH...

I think we will both work.. I am not the type to be at home full time with the kids, if any I will work part time but I will work..

eta: both of my parents work full time, both my parents love what they did and I had the blessing to have my grandmother to take care of me when I was off from school and my parents had to work.... summers I used to go to summer camp