Help do you think this is wrong

112903 Posted: Feb 12, 2003 09:06 PM

Help do you think this is wrong

FI assumes that his family will stay at our Apartment on our wedding night, we will be at a hotel. I think the idea is absurd!!! We are not living together before the wedding and I don't want anyone sleeping in our apartment before the two of us do......I can't imagine his parents sleeping in my bed Yuck I am annoyed, skeeved.... I honestly am really ticked off. Am I over reacting? P.s. it is not like they CAN'T afford a hotel room for one night, they totally can!

CutieLipps Posted: Feb 12, 2003 09:11 PM

Re: Help do you think this is wrong

I agree with you - they should stay at a hotel if they can afford it.

LnP2003 Posted: Feb 12, 2003 09:21 PM

Re: Help do you think this is wrong

i agree with you.... your apartment is for the 2 of you to bless!!!!

kptoys Posted: Feb 12, 2003 09:23 PM

Re: Help do you think this is wrong

Yes I think they should stay in a hotel. I dont like the idea of people sleeping in my bed either... Id be washing the sheets 2x before I would sleep in them.

MISHY Posted: Feb 12, 2003 09:27 PM

Re: Help do you think this is wrong

I told my FH that I wanted to stay in the apt the first night.. Hopefully we will be moved in June 1st but I think it would be so romantic to spend the first night married in apt! He can even carry me over the threshold PLUS we will have an extra 300 to bring on honeymoon!

balilove Posted: Feb 12, 2003 10:10 PM

Re: Help do you think this is wrong

I don't think you are wrong. I wouldn't want anyone staying there.

avesur Posted: Feb 12, 2003 11:31 PM

Re: Help do you think this is wrong

yes, why don't exchange places? They in the hotel, and you in the appartment?

EvenEdan Posted: Feb 12, 2003 11:52 PM

Re: Help do you think this is wrong

They absolutely should not spend the night in your apartment before you two do. I agree with you, why can't they stay in a hotel? That is absurd.
I definitely would not tell your FI that you are skeeved of his parents staying at your house though, he may get insulted and think that you are implying that they are gross or something. Explain to him how you feel but leave out words like skeeved!

ChristineC68 Posted: Feb 13, 2003 05:44 AM

Re: Help do you think this is wrong

I wouldn't want someone else sleeping in my bed before me either. I would talk to your FH about having his parents stay at a hotel.

wacky Posted: Feb 13, 2003 07:45 AM

Re: Help do you think this is wrong

Tell his parents to check into a hotel. Your apt should be void of anyone elses asses.

karen32 Posted: Feb 13, 2003 08:23 AM

Re: Help do you think this is wrong

I'm having the same issue - and I'm kicking them all to a hotel!!!! It's one thing with a regular visit when people stay with me, I don't mind - but not the night before and the night of the wedding. Give me a break!!!!!

Sassy Posted: Feb 13, 2003 08:25 AM

Re: Help do you think this is wrong

I totally agree with you. Noone is staying in our apartment OR in our bed. Stand your ground, your first night in your apartment will be special, but not as much if his parents were sleeping there first.

farah416 Posted: Feb 13, 2003 08:32 AM

Re: Help do you think this is wrong

Why don't you tell him that before your wedding you want to fix up the apt REALLY nice for when you two begin your married life together - nice new sheets, put out candles, have a vase ready to go for some flowers... You know, to continue the honeymoon when you first get back. Let him know that if his parents stay there, all your hard work won't pan out. It's a nice start together and a nice way to get his parents out of the apt without offending anyone!

I'd be skeeved too. Originally my FBIL and FSIL (I love them both to pieces, but they are messy people) wanted to stay at our place (so they could have a vacation in the city) while we were on our honeymoon. I had planned on doing the above, so I was a little freaked out. It turns out that they will have a newborn when we get married, so it's not an issue any more...

Good luck!

NYCMeghan Posted: Feb 13, 2003 08:49 AM

Re: Help do you think this is wrong

It is totally inappropriate for his parents to stay in your apartment. Either offer to trade, or if they are totally insistent, just book them a room and tell them the week before that is where they are staying. You could make the argument that other parents/grandparents/etc. are staying at that particular hotel, and you knew they would be more comfortable there...If they are still stuck on staying at your place find a younger friend to agree to 'housesit' and explain that he/she is staying due to financial reasons, and do they really want to oust one of your friends who cannot afford a hotel?

dubliner Posted: Feb 13, 2003 08:49 AM

Re: Help do you think this is wrong

I agree with you - if they can't afford a hotel, can you get them one?

dkga1026 Posted: Feb 13, 2003 08:53 AM

Re: Help do you think this is wrong

You are absolutely right!! Noone should sleep in your house before you do. And you shouldn't have to change your plans and sleep there on your wedding night just to keep them from it. Tell FH to book them a room and keep your reservation as well.

What-Now Posted: Feb 13, 2003 11:31 AM

Re: Help do you think this is wrong

Couldn't agree with you more! A request like that shouldn't have been make in the first place, you Fi’s parents should understand that the two of you should be the first couple to spend the night in that apartment! Very insensitive of them, I think! I have noticed since I got engaged that a lot of people don’t understand the feelings that we brides have about the whole bridal experience and how important some things are to us! People have no sentiment what so ever!