HELP! Sister-In-Law Causing MAJOR Upset
Hello Brides and Friends,
I have a very rough situation on my hands. The day after my fiance' and I got engaged, we personally drove to his brothers' homes and asked his brothers' children to be part of our wedding party. It was that day that my beloved sister in law (mother of one of my flower girls) said to me, 'My daughter will be in white, right?' At the time, I must have said yes, but really had NO idea what type of wedding attire I would chose since we had literally just became engaged.
A few months later, at a family party my siser-in-law was thumbing through a dress catalog. She turned to my fiances' older nieces and told them, 'This is the dress I am thinking about getting for *****'. I asked 2 times before she showed ME what she was looking at which was a white dress. So, me being the kind hearted person I am thought nothing of it.
Time past, and I went to the dress store. There I found out that my bridesmaid's dress came in MINI! Alfred Angelo Style #6493MM. I was sold! I immediately e-mailed my sister-in-law (my fiance's brothers wife, please observe this fact) about how happy I was that I found the dress. Here was her response:
'I think having ***** match the bridal party and not the bride is not a good idea. In every wedding party through the centuries flower girls match the bride. I will however, still see the dress you have in mind.'
We spoke on the phone soon after that, and she proceeded to tell me how the dress I chose was too long, too dark (my color is wine) and too mature for her little girl who is 3. She also said that it's one thing to tell the adult girls what to get as bridesmaids, but it's another thing to tell the flower girls what to get. I don't agree with her AT ALL, however to not make an issue I said,
'Ok, well if you are that opposed to this dress, although I am not happy, I will replace *****'s dress with something else, and the other little flower girls I have will wear what I haven chosen already.'
Apparently my sister-in-law did not hear me correctly, or heard what she wanted. She responded in a loud mean voice, 'WHAT???? Is that nice to say to me???This conversation is over!!!!' And she hung up.
So much for that...
The next day she proceeded to tell my 75 year old mother-in-law and 80 year old father-in-law that I KICKED her little girl out of my wedding party!!!
I was not a happy camper.
She also told my fiance in a loud Linda Blair like voice, 'I want to hear you say that you don't want your OWN BLOOD in your wedding party because your obstinate future wife won't compromise.'
I was even more so-not a happy camper.
I feel that my SIL is using her baby daughter as a wedge between her and I and my fiance'. His brother, nor her have not spoken a word to us since this all happened..and that was last October.
Sadly, since then my father-in-law has passed away. This was tragic for all of us and our hearts are broken, Despite his death, they still won't speak with us.
My dilemma is this..my mother-in-law is begging me to change this dress to suit her depute her rude comments. I am lost here..I so miss my what would have been future baby niece.
Any opinions would help.
Thanks!
The Upset Bride![]()
I have a very rough situation on my hands. The day after my fiance' and I got engaged, we personally drove to his brothers' homes and asked his brothers' children to be part of our wedding party. It was that day that my beloved sister in law (mother of one of my flower girls) said to me, 'My daughter will be in white, right?' At the time, I must have said yes, but really had NO idea what type of wedding attire I would chose since we had literally just became engaged.
A few months later, at a family party my siser-in-law was thumbing through a dress catalog. She turned to my fiances' older nieces and told them, 'This is the dress I am thinking about getting for *****'. I asked 2 times before she showed ME what she was looking at which was a white dress. So, me being the kind hearted person I am thought nothing of it.
Time past, and I went to the dress store. There I found out that my bridesmaid's dress came in MINI! Alfred Angelo Style #6493MM. I was sold! I immediately e-mailed my sister-in-law (my fiance's brothers wife, please observe this fact) about how happy I was that I found the dress. Here was her response:
'I think having ***** match the bridal party and not the bride is not a good idea. In every wedding party through the centuries flower girls match the bride. I will however, still see the dress you have in mind.'
We spoke on the phone soon after that, and she proceeded to tell me how the dress I chose was too long, too dark (my color is wine) and too mature for her little girl who is 3. She also said that it's one thing to tell the adult girls what to get as bridesmaids, but it's another thing to tell the flower girls what to get. I don't agree with her AT ALL, however to not make an issue I said,
'Ok, well if you are that opposed to this dress, although I am not happy, I will replace *****'s dress with something else, and the other little flower girls I have will wear what I haven chosen already.'
Apparently my sister-in-law did not hear me correctly, or heard what she wanted. She responded in a loud mean voice, 'WHAT???? Is that nice to say to me???This conversation is over!!!!' And she hung up.
So much for that...
The next day she proceeded to tell my 75 year old mother-in-law and 80 year old father-in-law that I KICKED her little girl out of my wedding party!!!
I was not a happy camper.
She also told my fiance in a loud Linda Blair like voice, 'I want to hear you say that you don't want your OWN BLOOD in your wedding party because your obstinate future wife won't compromise.'
I was even more so-not a happy camper.
I feel that my SIL is using her baby daughter as a wedge between her and I and my fiance'. His brother, nor her have not spoken a word to us since this all happened..and that was last October.
Sadly, since then my father-in-law has passed away. This was tragic for all of us and our hearts are broken, Despite his death, they still won't speak with us.
My dilemma is this..my mother-in-law is begging me to change this dress to suit her depute her rude comments. I am lost here..I so miss my what would have been future baby niece.
Any opinions would help.
Thanks!
The Upset Bride
