HELP w/ bridal party

marymoon Posted: Apr 07, 2005 08:38 PM

HELP w/ bridal party

So as soon as we got engaged, like literally within an hour I was on the phone form florida calling my best friends to tell them and I asked several of them to be in the BP. So out of my really really close friends, we have 4 (maybe 5 guys) and 2 girls. The reason it's only 2 girls is because I have my sister and my very best best best girlfriend in the BP, and then from high school I have about 10 girlfriends..and I just don't know how to choose some and not others. I don't want to offend anyone, but I can't have 12 bridesmaids. Also I'm not THAT close to a lot of them anymore. There are some people I was REALLY clsoe to in HS, but we drifted apart. As a group we see each other every so often, but it's hard because about half are in different countries right now. I don't know what to go by, who I'm close with NOW or who I WAS close with, and how do I pick without offending anyone?

I'm so stressed. I was going to just not pick any, but that would suck

sarahthegreat Posted: Apr 07, 2005 08:41 PM

Re: HELP w/ bridal party

if you really think you would be offending them by not asking them, don't ask any. it ***** b/c i know you want them, but there is really no good way to do it. i'm sure the ones not asked will be hurt, but they'll say 'i understand' to your face and then b!tch about you behind your back...sorry its rough, but there is no easy way to do it

marymoon Posted: Apr 07, 2005 08:43 PM

Re: HELP w/ bridal party

yeah that's kind of how I felt about it. I wasn;t going to have any, but there are some I really want. Maybe with everyone out of the country I can play my odds and ask them all and hope half of them can't..lol

sarahthegreat Posted: Apr 07, 2005 08:43 PM

Re: HELP w/ bridal party

Posted by marymoon

yeah that's kind of how I felt about it. I wasn;t going to have any, but there are some I really want. Maybe with everyone out of the country I can play my odds and ask them all and hope half of them can't..lol

good point

Noiva06 Posted: Apr 08, 2005 10:45 AM

Re: HELP w/ bridal party

I am going thru the same situation....

I have 7 best friends from high school and we go out for each one of birthdays...but that's about it...i don't see or talk to them anymore than that...but when we do meet up it's just like old times.....and then there's all my girls from college....aaahhhh!!!!

i'm so stressed out....

buggiegirl Posted: Apr 08, 2005 10:55 AM

Re: HELP w/ bridal party

We are not having a bridal party for just that reason- we are only doing MOH and BM.

I have 7 friends that I am super close with, FH has 3 plus 1000 other friends... I just chose my cousin as MOH, and FH picked his brother for BM. We plan on honoring our friends in other ways.

Initially I thought people would be mad at this, but alot of them are relieved for financial reasons)- so it is working out okay.

I would love to have a big BP, but it just is not in the cards

Good luck-

VogueBride Posted: Apr 08, 2005 01:14 PM

Re: HELP w/ bridal party

i really had a worry about htis w/ my bp as well. i lives wil 3 other girls for the past 3 years (of college) we are all very very close...but i was closest to one the most....i deff didnt think i could just ask her...but my bp was already at 6 w/ just the one so i couldt ask them all...so i didnt. i explaned to them i love them and just cant have more and went with people closest to FH and I ( i think that has a lot to do with it..for me n e way) and honestly..as much as friends want to be in BP's....if they are not in vited..the first thing they will say is..wow..ill be saving a lot of money. its not something they think of before they are/arenot asked to be in a BP...b/c they just want to be there for you.but the savings will be a goo cusion to their hurt feelings. either way im trying to say...2 of my VERY CLOSE friends understood...and one of those 2 just got engaged..and while again i would love to be in her BP i will not be offended AT ALL if i am not..b/c this day is about HER! and right now..the day is about YOU....no one should be upset about that! (and if anyone is...tell them i said they souldnt be!!!)

marymoon Posted: Apr 08, 2005 01:22 PM

Re: HELP w/ bridal party

I was going to pick none, but there is at leas one I definitely want to have,,and maybe 1 or 2 more. it's so confusing.

Kim51103 Posted: Apr 08, 2005 02:52 PM

Re: HELP w/ bridal party

I went through the same thing....
I just picked the most important people....theres really nothing u can do

sarahbelle Posted: Apr 08, 2005 05:33 PM

Re: HELP w/ bridal party

I had the hardest time deciding whether or not to include more friends from college. In the end, I just asked the one girl I stayed closest to. If the others were offended, they didn't say anything to me about it.

shellnroc Posted: Apr 08, 2005 05:39 PM

Re: HELP w/ bridal party

That's a tough one. It's definitely a touchy situation. I think you have to do what makes you happy. You are the one who will be looking at those pictures. It's your day!

marymoon Posted: Apr 08, 2005 05:45 PM

Re: HELP w/ bridal party

This is me about this:

rafiki Posted: Apr 08, 2005 07:00 PM

Re: HELP w/ bridal party

i am in a similiar situation. i have six very good friends and was a BM for all of them. however, i have three sisters but i refuse to have a bridal party of 9 girls. i have decided that the party will be just my 3 sisters and my best friend since fourth grade. i haven't told the other girls yet and i just might not say anything. honestly there is so much other stuff going on right now that the last thing i care about is any of them being offended. i don't mean to sound harsh, it's just that there are a lot of other things that are more important at this time. also, i look at it as a way of them saving money!

i don't know if this helped you at all, but it was the only way out for me.