He invited more people to begin with and of our RSVPs most Nos are coming from my side. Now family is coming from italy too - i just feel like its becoming their 'show' (for lack of a better word)and my family will be pushed aside. Anyone else feel like this?
I'm tempted to make cardboard cutouts of people to represent my family:)
Added Question: So now that the Italy family is coming, that adds another 6 people to the RD - which we are paying for ourselves. Thus far, they haven't paid for anything - is it rude to ask them to pay towards it now?
cindyandkevin
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Re: His Guests Overpower Ours
Aww, I have the opposite problem. My side pretty much doubles the amount on his side, I feel bad about that. Is there anyone else on your side that you can add? Friends, co-workers??
spooks
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Re: His Guests Overpower Ours
At this point I probably wouldn't really add any - its just kind of sad. I'm updating the post to add a question.
glinda_goodwitch
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Re: His Guests Overpower Ours
I swear I was going to post a topic like this a few minutes ago! I have a smaller family than my FH, and they are OOT. So I know that I will be under-represented. And yet I want No's because we need the room at the reception hall! But whoever comes I'll be happy. I know already my cousin can't come because her husband has cancer and she has to stay with him. She wouldn't be able to leave him the weekend, and he wants her there. I totally understand that. But she is one person that I will really miss on my wedding day.
leese
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Re: His Guests Overpower Ours
In our final count, his side is 19 tables, mine is 9 tables. (We combined three tables together) And that means that he has about 90 people on top of mine.
I felt bad for my parents because I didn't want them to feel like it's his show or their show or whatever.
But here's the thing. No matter WHO is there... it's no one's show BUT YOUR OWN SHOW. And as I say to my mom, as long as the people I truly care about are there, that's all I want. It doesn't matter how many he has or I have. It's all about me, him, my family and close friends. The rest, to me, are guests but not going to improve or hurt my day!
Try to stay positive!
roxyspark
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Re: His Guests Overpower Ours
I am in a similar situation. My side will be at 3 tables and his side will take up 18 tables.
If I were you, I might ask his family to chip in for the RD.
waterspout4
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Re: His Guests Overpower Ours
I hear you. I have 3 tables. He has 9. I don't really care though. Family is much more important on his side and they treat me like one of their own.
M&S Sept12006
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Re: His Guests Overpower Ours
Posted by waterspout4
I hear you. I have 3 tables. He has 9. I don't really care though. Family is much more important on his side and they treat me like one of their own.
Same here...I have 3 tables and FH has 5...but thats bc my family if from Europe and many will not be able to attend, and his family is not that big either...we're both inviting the same amount of friends...at the beginning I felt kind of bad, but now I got over it...its our wedding day and as long as we're surrounded by people who love us, nothing else matters...and by the way WE are running the show that day NOT our families...
Beth1210
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Re: His Guests Overpower Ours
my DH had more tables then me- and that's more thank yous for him to write out and less for me!
reenielady
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Re: His Guests Overpower Ours
I would ask FH to ask his parents about chipping in for the RD since there are oot relatives coming to it.
brooklynbridezilla
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Re: His Guests Overpower Ours
I was in the same situation, my family could have all fit in one table. It made me a little sad before the wedding, but the day of, it didn't bother me at all. I was so amazed at how happy everyone was for us, it didn't matter who was from what side.
Preshy7
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Re: His Guests Overpower Ours
thats happeneing here too it is what it is...
i know how you feel though....i cringe when my mom complains about it
Kris516
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Posted by Preshy7
thats happeneing here too it is what it is...
i know how you feel though....i cringe when my mom complains about it
Same here. My mom saw the guest list counts the other night, and told me he can't invite any of his 'maybes'. I hear what she is saying, my parents have done a lot for this wedding, and now even the RD will fall on our shoulders.
Leese makes a great point though - Stay positive!
EJSD2006
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Re: His Guests Overpower Ours
Posted by cindyandkevin
Aww, I have the opposite problem. My side pretty much doubles the amount on his side, I feel bad about that. Is there anyone else on your side that you can add? Friends, co-workers??
me too. but FH knew i had a large family. my dad is 1 of 10 and my mom is 1 of 6. I have 42 first cousins! FH has 5 cousins...total! so it's not really a surprise. not only that, FH doesn't want to invite anyone from his work and i have such a large office that i am going to have 25 just from the office. i feel really bad but FH is ok with it...so far!
leese
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Re: His Guests Overpower Ours
Posted by Kris516
Posted by Preshy7
thats happeneing here too it is what it is...
i know how you feel though....i cringe when my mom complains about it
Same here. My mom saw the guest list counts the other night, and told me he can't invite any of his 'maybes'. I hear what she is saying, my parents have done a lot for this wedding, and now even the RD will fall on our shoulders.
Leese makes a great point though - Stay positive!
I used to cringe when my mom complained about it...and I told my FH he couldn't invite his B list.
Then....when we found out that we were under, I had to in ONE NIGHT remake RSVP cards and send out to the people I 'blocked' beforehand.
I hate to say this, but sometimes..it really does work out and I would have let him invite everyone he wanted in the first place.
