I'm afraid of what it will be like as we grow and change, people don't typically stay the same their whole life and that's the tricky part of mariage. you both have to change together and understand and embrace those changes. i feel like this is when marriages fall apart because the two hardly know eachother anymore, they stop paying attention. i never want that to happen and that's why people always say you have to work at a marriage. i'm afraid one of us will check out and not give it the work it deserves. i see it happen with married couples. it's SO scary!
lipglossjunky73
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I wasn't fearful of anything - we knew right away that we were 'it' - I mean, the 2nd date we were talking marriage, and we still waited about 2 years, so we were ready....
I was a bit nervous about being a good stepmother... his daughters have been very involved with us right from the beginning, and we always got along, but I realized I was making the jump from daddy's cool girlfriend to a parental figure, plus I have a stepmother and I know my issues with her, and didnt want the girls to have those issues with me....
Other than that, our life has been wonderful post-wedding - no post wedding blues. I did get pregnant right away - not planned - which does add something we were not anticipating right off the bat being that our finances are horrendous (DH has been laid off since April) so that is a bit scary, but I have faith that things will work out for us - as they already have in so many ways
CLMon7906
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Posted by lollipop
In ALL honesty, I just hope I'm not in the 50% divorce rate club...that's what scares me.
agreed.
rojerono
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The wedding. I live with FH and we have the house and we have the kids... so none of that is frightening. But standing up in front of our friends and family... being 'in the spotlight' for all that time during the reception... arghh!
I am not shy... but I have never been the 'love the limelight' type of person. And neither is FH.
I am a little afraid we will both drink FAR too much to assuage our nerves and wind up looking like RETARDS by dancing the funky chicken or something.
Jesses Girl
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honestly...
im afraid i will let him down. i never want him to second guess his decision about why he wanted to marry me...down the line I want him to love me the way he loves me today and more... that is was scares me the most...
finances dont scare me bc well..maybe they should but i dont worry too much about it
greenfreak
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Wow, some really raw emotion here. I hope sharing this with us helps, ladies.
I've never been concerned about our relationship and we've been together for many years, through the 20's where we changed and matured. We are different people than when we first met but it's a really easy adjustment.
I could count on one hand how many fights we've had in 7 years, so that's not much of an issue either.
Finances worried me at first but we sat down and figured it all out a year before the wedding and knew we were ok.
So what's there to worry about?
That even though we did everything right, that our relationship is as strong as it could be, that we are being patient and planning on buying a house next year... That a major tragedy in either of our families could change all of that. That something awful and completely unexpected could happen. That all our years together will mean nothing and something that is completely out of our control could ruin our lives.
I guess that's not specific to weddings, that's an overall worry. But cementing our relationship with the vows we made that day made me think about it a bit. The whole 'We're too happy - something bad is going to happen'.
LaurenluvsTJ
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Posted by CLMon7906
Posted by lollipop
In ALL honesty, I just hope I'm not in the 50% divorce rate club...that's what scares me.
agreed.
yeah me too... I think to myself - everyone who got married must have been as much in love as we are when they got married - what happened to make them fall out of love?
murphyt33
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Posted by lollipop
In ALL honesty, I just hope I'm not in the 50% divorce rate club...that's what scares me.
I agree....I have been with my FH for 8 years and can't see that happening but you never know. So scary.
Shellycakes123
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changin my name...i love it :( its hard to part
patticakes
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I just always want to make sure that we have time for each other to listen, care, console, love, or just have fun! Nothing should get in the way of that! Our love is so strong and even though it's work, nothing will tear us apart. I refuse.
ant n tilde
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our big goal is buying a house - and if we cant i will deal with it - and we will get a co-op or something - but i am scared that FH will be devastated that he couldnt provide that for me and it will affect our marriage
he has repeatedly promised my parents that he will be able to afford a house - but since we want to stay in our own neighborhood ($800K and UP) it looks like its going to be a hard goal to accomplish - my parents dont care if we live in a box as long as he treats me well, and i dont really care either - its just I feel that this is his biggest goal. . . .
