how do you learn to love youself?

I am trying to figure that out. some days (like today) I hate the way I look. I am not asking for compliments or anything like that...just a way to feel better about myself...

I appreciate to no end how you girls always try to make me feel better, but when I feel like this...I need to be able to help myself.

how do you do it? how do you not want to cut off certain body parts and replace them with others....??

I figure it this way, DH isn't stupid. I'm not the last woman on earth that he had to settle for, he CHOSE to be with me so there has to be something good about the way I look or else he never would've given me the time of day. I think about how lucky I am to be with such a wonderful man, and that I can't be as bad as I think I am or else he wouldn't have asked me to marry him. Feel better!!

I just remind myself how good my life is. Of course, I could lose a few pounds, I could make more money, I would not have to work for a living, etc.. but in the end I love where I am at in my life.

Regularly I think about how to work towards my goals. I have short term goals and long term goals. I don't obsess about them... I just work towards them slowly. And as I look back, I can be proud of all my accomplishments.

The grass is always greener on the other side. So I am not jealous of other people.

I think that at times we either have to realize that its impossible to cut off a part of our body and replace it with another, or if its an issue like weight, you just have to tell yourself that you have to work harder at achieving your goal. But I think the best thing to do is to look at the positive qualities of your body and your personality as well and say to youself - there is only one me...nobody else has what I have. And just love yourself.

I have a flat @zz...everytime I wear something that is not very flattering and get disgusted with myself, I just have to tell myself 'Well if you worked out, then you could probably add a little roundness in some areas...but you dont so deal with it'...

I look at pictures of myself (the good ones only) - it actually helps a lot when I'm hating the way that I look.
And I force myself to work out because I fall into the 'I hate the way that I look' ruts more often when I'm sedentary.

When all else fails, I get wasted.

I try to be realistic and know that there are things about me that I just can't change. I don't have a small frame by any stretch of the imagination, I could never be petite no matter how much weight I could lose.

So I look to inspiration. Women who are shaped like me and I could emulate, if I really put the effort in and lost weight like I did for the wedding.

I know it's possible. I also know, if I don't take the initiative, it's my own fault. The question is - how important is it to you? Isn't there any way to gain that self esteem without making drastic changes?

I can be happy without being a single-digit size. I know I'm a lot more than the clothes I wear, my hairstyle, or my weight. That's worth more to me than being thin or model-like beautiful. Because no matter what I look like on the outside, I will always be the same on the inside.

My husband loves me and thinks I'm sexy, and I feel the same. The weight gain, gray hairs, and wrinkles have already started for us. The older you get, the more the mirror will betray you. We'll do what we can to remain healthy, but the mirror image isn't why we married each other. Or else we'll be in trouble.

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Posted by greenfreak
I can be happy without being a single-digit size. I know I'm a lot more than the clothes I wear, my hairstyle, or my weight. That's worth more to me than being thin or model-like beautiful. Because no matter what I look like on the outside, I will always be the same on the inside.

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Well said.

I feel so good about who I am on the inside, that most days, my weight does not bother me. I believe my friends and family are a testament to the person that I am. I'm proud of who I've become, and sometimes the mirror actually tells me I look BETTER than how I physically look. To put it lightly -reverse anorexia sets in.

My advice to you is to do the same. If you're having a bad day, take a look around you and give yourself a pat on the back for the relationships you've made, and the successes in your life. Take this site for example...Look how many friends you have made here. Most of us bonded site unseen - we began to like each other for who we were on the inside before we even had time to make judgements about who we were on the outside.

thanks ladies.

you all make so much sense.

I think I may have a switch or two broken.

thanks again.