So, how does this sound - feasible? FH and I have been having a hard time deciding if we want to have a bridal party at all since it just seems like it adds a lot of stress and expense. Our idea has been to just have a Maid of Honor (my sister), Matron of Honor (FSIL) and two best men, (FBILs) - to keep it intimate. Then, since we are having a wedding mass in church, we would assign to our close friends, who would have been in the bp, jobs for the day - like readings, presenting the gifts, handing out the programs and ushers. This way our bf's are still involved in our wedding and can participate in a way that is really meaninful to us. For some reason something is just irking me about not having a traditional bp. Any advice from brides who are making this same decision and which way you are leaning? Thanks for listening . . .
DnT2010
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Re: How does this sound - re: bridal party
i think its a great idea. im not having nay of my close girl friends in my bp either.. it would get wayy too out of hand # wise.. i plan on including them the same way you are.
GonnaBeeMrsG
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Re: How does this sound - re: bridal party
I think what you are doing is great and I m sure a lot of ppl are envying you right now!
Jna2010
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Re: How does this sound - re: bridal party
maybe im just not reading it right but it kinda sounds like a normal bp to me? JMO. Do you mean you want to skip out on the whole bm dresses and all that? maybe im just confused
handing out the programs and stuff like that is what a lot of bp members do at the wedding ive been to. if your worried about getting them all together a bunch of times, the only other time most brides would invite their bp to anything before the wedding is the rehearsal dinner and f they want any additional opinions on anything
sorry if i didnt even answer your question
grkbarbie
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Re: How does this sound - re: bridal party
my bp so far(will prob stay this way) fh's sis and my bros gf(of 73902703 yrs) fh will have my bro and 1 of his friends.
small, simple!
SummerGroom10
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Re: How does this sound - re: bridal party
That sounds like a great idea, because while it seems small in the whole scheme of things, the bridal party gifts are a cost as well, and by doing that you keep everyone involved and keep one expense out of the way...
CappyGirl
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Re: How does this sound - re: bridal party
Yes, I definitely want to skip out on the picking bm dresses, haha. Its nice to hear that we are just having a small bp rather than no bp, I guess I need to look at it that way. I am very close with my girlfriends that would be included if we had a bp, I guess I am just having a hard time believing that they won't be in the wedding, but they will totally be there and be a part of everything anyway - probably even more so. . . I am slowly making myself feel better - still appreciate your opinions. THANKS!!
PS - I guess we could still buy bp gifts, but just something small, esp. if we are not expecting them to spend tons on dresses, tuxes, etc. Right?
Jna2010
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Re: How does this sound - re: bridal party
Posted by CappyGirl
Yes, I definitely want to skip out on the picking bm dresses, haha. Its nice to hear that we are just having a small bp rather than no bp, I guess I need to look at it that way. I am very close with my girlfriends that would be included if we had a bp, I guess I am just having a hard time believing that they won't be in the wedding, but they will totally be there and be a part of everything anyway - probably even more so. . . I am slowly making myself feel better - still appreciate your opinions. THANKS!!
ohhhhhh forgive me im a little slow, either that or have some serious issues reading lol.... its def a good idea! i wish i can buy all my girls great gifts and all this stuff but i have 6 of them plus my MOH.... good decision on keeping it limited!!
jcisrhiannon
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Re: How does this sound - re: bridal party
The truth is that the bridal party doesn't actually DO anything anyway, other than stand there in photos in matching dresses. If you've ever been an attendant before, you know that you usually hate the dress and feel ugly in it, and are annoyed at having to buy it.
I'm doing my friends a big favor and not actually putting them in matchy-matchy dresses, but am going to write full paragraphs explaining who my best friends are, how I met them, why I want them to be around me on my wedding day, in the wedding program.
I think that's more unique, personal, and more complimentary to my good friends, than making them wear dresses they didn't choose and stand onstage.
I have never understood the point of bridesmaids anyway. It's all just part of the whole consumer-driven ritual of pretending to be a princess for a day. It has nothing to do with love or commitment or passion, which is what my wedding is going to be about.
That is kind of exactly how I feel . . . I would like to find a genuine way to honor my friends without making them my 'attendants' - thanks for the advice!
MrsC2010
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Re: How does this sound - re: bridal party
Posted by jcisrhiannon
The truth is that the bridal party doesn't actually DO anything anyway, other than stand there in photos in matching dresses. If you've ever been an attendant before, you know that you usually hate the dress and feel ugly in it, and are annoyed at having to buy it.
I'm doing my friends a big favor and not actually putting them in matchy-matchy dresses, but am going to write full paragraphs explaining who my best friends are, how I met them, why I want them to be around me on my wedding day, in the wedding program.
I think that's more unique, personal, and more complimentary to my good friends, than making them wear dresses they didn't choose and stand onstage.
I have never understood the point of bridesmaids anyway. It's all just part of the whole consumer-driven ritual of pretending to be a princess for a day. It has nothing to do with love or commitment or passion, which is what my wedding is going to be about.
i agree that there is nothing wrong with keeping the bridal party small if thats what you want...
i disagree though that there is no point to bridesmaids and that you are doing them a favor by not picking them. Yes, it can be a pain to pay for dresses that you may not love...but the point is to be there to support your friend. I wanted the people I was closest with to be up there with me to support me and to share the special moments (getting ready together, etc) Every wedding I have been in as moh/bm was an honor...and i would have been truly disappointed if I wasn't asked...regardless of whether i really liked the dress or wanted to shell out the money. I also don't think just being given a duty like handing out programs is really an honor...its more of a job. The bp party is a tradition and an honor...but thats just my opinion.
like i said tho---nothing wrong with having a small bp if thats what you truly want
AdriandSteve
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Re: How does this sound - re: bridal party
It's def a good idea to keep it to family and extremly close friends.
Nothing is wrong with having your close friends help you out the day of.
MrsInglima
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Re: How does this sound - re: bridal party
I think that's a really good idea. Since it's just your family participating in the BP friends will understand. And it's always good to throw in, 'we would be honored if you read' or 'it would really mean so much to me...' makes people feel special. Haha.
JenBill61210
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Re: How does this sound - re: bridal party
its a great idea, i like the idea of small and simple as well
jesca
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Re: How does this sound - re: bridal party
Posted by CappyGirl
So, how does this sound - feasible? FH and I have been having a hard time deciding if we want to have a bridal party at all since it just seems like it adds a lot of stress and expense. Our idea has been to just have a Maid of Honor (my sister), Matron of Honor (FSIL) and two best men, (FBILs) - to keep it intimate. Then, since we are having a wedding mass in church, we would assign to our close friends, who would have been in the bp, jobs for the day - like readings, presenting the gifts, handing out the programs and ushers. This way our bf's are still involved in our wedding and can participate in a way that is really meaninful to us. For some reason something is just irking me about not having a traditional bp. Any advice from brides who are making this same decision and which way you are leaning? Thanks for listening . . .
we're just having two MOHs and two BMs. if not it would;ve turned into like, 20 people.
lori7570
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Re: How does this sound - re: bridal party
I wish that I had keep my bp a bit smaller...oh well!!
SusiBtoM
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Re: How does this sound - re: bridal party
Two words : LESS STRESS
NYYankeeGirl72
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Re: How does this sound - re: bridal party
I think your sounds perfect. It is almost like I will do.
FH wants only a best man, so I had to keep my party small. I have a MOH and Matron of Honor. My cousin's daughter was going to be my flower girl, but she has grown so tall that she is almost my height (she just turned 9). So I am thinking of making her a junior bridesmaid. I will have my other close friends assist in readings, helping to decorate the church, hand our programs, etc.
