I am in control of everything. I let FH know how much everything is costing, but he has no idea exactly what is booked. He has not been to any appts with me, nor does he want to go to any with me. He is ok with me doing everything as long as I stay within the budget which I am doing.
GR2010
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Re: how IN CONTROL are YOU?
Even though FH makes about 3x what I do and will be paying for most of the wedding I have been in control of most of the planning, I set the budget, make the appoinments and get final veto power on most everything. He knows I get so excited about everything wedding related so he lets me do my thing. His famous phrase through all of this has been 'I just want you to be happy.' He has been involved though, he gives his opinions and we even went with the Woodlands after I thought I was set on the Vanderbilt because he made some excellent observations... He comes to appoint ments and then asks me some really insightful questions to help me make my decisions.
I would have a chat with your FH. I think planning a wedding is a good indicator how certain things like finances will be handled down the road. You are going to be married and all major decisions, including finances should be made together regardless of who has/makes more.
Katlyco
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Re: how IN CONTROL are YOU?
I make nothing compared to FH, and he is the one who will be paying for most of our wedding but since I have more time on my hands to research I feel like I am in more control. FH is completely easy going and so far has liked all of my ideas and decisions THANK GOD!!
Maybe sit down and explain this to FH, it can't hurt.
HTH
futureMrsJSL
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Re: how IN CONTROL are YOU?
I'd say we're both in control. We are both paying for the wedding. I do most of the research on the vendors, etc and he comes with me to the appointments. From there we both decide if the vendor is right for us.
mrsdraskin2009
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Re: how IN CONTROL are YOU?
I just might be TOO laid back
FH lets me do what I want, pick the vendors, etc. He's happy if I am happy.
However, when he has a concern, I take it into consideration. He though I spent too much on flowers, so he asked me to keep looking. Then I thought, yeah, maybe I did...so now I am looking into alternatives for my CPs...no biggie.
To be honest, my life is too short and there are more important things for me to care about. My wedding will be beautiful and that is all that matters. Fighting over inconsequential things is not my style. I refuse to let a wedding overtake my life or affect my relationship.
Yes, it is an important day but it is still just ONE day...and I refuse to let it take over!
asg450
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Re: how IN CONTROL are YOU?
I do check in with FH before I make appointments so we can go together. Our parents are hosting the wedding; but they never gave us an exact budget. So FH and I created our own budget for them and we've been trying to get the best prices for that.
Our parents don't really have opinions on our vendors; they just let us do all the searching and they agree to the final price. I feel very in control of the things I am paying for, but sometimes I wonder if I could have gotten a better price for the things our parents are paying for.
Dean Bean
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Re: how IN CONTROL are YOU?
I run everything by him. I don't want him to dislike anything I choose so I include him in everything. He usually has an opinion, and sometimes I wonder why I even bother running every little thing by him, but he really likes being involved and making decisions. He gets so excited when I start talking about the wedding, so how could I not, you know? It's really cute.
deanna225
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Re: how IN CONTROL are YOU?
fh is the one paying for most of the wedding. so when i tell him we have to do things he tells me do it and then let me know how much and when i have to be there. so i can say im the one in control.
On all the major things we made every decision together. Little things like favors and invitations - I just told him what I think and he agreed - I tell him what I spend
drivwal
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Re: how IN CONTROL are YOU?
we both came up with a budget that we felt was right for us and i am in control of finding vendors and stuff. i tell him when i like someone or something and let him see it and he usually just says sure or we go to meetings with vendors together. i guess neither of us is totally in control, we share it
Future Mrs H
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Re: how IN CONTROL are YOU?
We make every decision together. Everything is 50/50. I wont order or buy anything without asking his opinion (except my dress). So far we have agreed 100% on everything.
scatteredx12
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Re: how IN CONTROL are YOU?
I'm more in control than FH is. He researched the RH's and did all the contacting for that, and that was it. I have researched everything else but I do always ask him his opinion and I show him stuff and we plan out when we can do appointments together.
20mrsc10
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Re: how IN CONTROL are YOU?
Haha I'm definately in control, but that's mine and fhs personalities..I'm very type a while fh is very laid back..were covering like 75 percent of the wedding and our parents are covering the rest but the part were paying were splitting 50/50..other than that I basically do all the research and vendor appointments and fh comes to sign the contract and has veto power if we go to sign and he doesn't like them
pasta3825
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Re: how IN CONTROL are YOU?
Since I don't live in town. I make all of the decisions on where to look, make the appointment, go down to long island, check out the possible vendors, dwlindle it downt to two vendors, then we decide which we like and what we can afford.
Jna2010
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Re: how IN CONTROL are YOU?
fh is whipped!!!! lol jk no but i am pretty much in control, i pick all the vendors for us to check out, he'll come with me and help me decide between them BUT i basically have the final say and thats the way uh huh uh huh i like it
