How involved are your BM's?

Just curious about what role everyone's BM's are playing. I'm pretty much a do everything on my own kind of girl so I'm really just having my BM's stand up for me the day of the wedding.

Re: How involved are your BM's?

Same here.. but I still have 11 months to go..

The only thing I've asked them to help in is picking out the bm dresses.. and it's been a HORROR!!

12 girls cannot decide on a **** thing!!

Re: How involved are your BM's?

A word on advice on that one...next time you go shopping take only your MOH and maybe one other BM. Narrow it down to a few dresses and then let a couple more in on the decision making. Your life will be much easier!!

Re: How involved are your BM's?

I really feel that being a BM should be a fun thing and a great experience (I've been lucky, but my friends have some crazy horror stories). My girls have very different body types but good taste, so I gave them shawls (navy blue) and told them to find evening gowns to match.

I've just been trying to get everyone together for a meal and that's been impossible so far... I occassionally drag one or two of the more interested ones (with time) somewhere for an opinion or something, but I tend to just bounce ideas off of them.

Mostly they will show up to the wedding and have a great time -- and hopefully throw me an awesome bachlorette party!

Re: How involved are your BM's?

Yeah, I think I will just take my MOH ( my sister) I saw a couple that I reallly like, and I've emailed them to the girls, and I've chosen dresses I feel will flatter all their builds, but I get responses like 'I don't like it' or 'I'm too fat' or 'I dont' like the material'

I'm trying to go with a theme, you know?

and what's worse is that here I am trying to find any which way to make these dresses as inexpensive as possible, you know?

Perhaps I'll post pics of them and have you guys help me decide!!

Re: How involved are your BM's?

I took my sister and best friend (both my MOHs) to look at my gowns and the BM gowns. Then everyone went to order theirs. They helped with my shower- got the mini-cake favors and invites and made the wishing well. I have not asked much of them so I cannot say they haven't helped me.
My best friend helped me stuff my invites and get them into the mail. So I am happy with what everyone is doing.

Re: How involved are your BM's?

I give you credit for having 12 girls. I have 4 total, two of which work right down the hall from me in the same office and it is often difficult to get schedules together. It took us a month and 1/2 to get a shopping excursion together to look for dresses. I actually knew exactly what dress I wanted to get and tried it on myself to see how it fit and all. So that made life easier for us. Just remember that yes, you want the girls to like the dress (ideally) and feel comfortable in it, but this is your wedding and ultimately you have the last word. Also, I think if you accept that all 12 girls are probably not going to like what you pick then it will help

Re: How involved are your BM's?

Not very involved at all. I think they are setting up the shower and bach. party. I picked the dress and asked them to go with me one day next month so hopefully that will work! I picked the place, florist and band without them...I still have a little more than 8 months to go so things can change.

Re: How involved are your BM's?

not very. i went from having 6 to 4 and the only one who is great is my MOH, thats why shes the MOH i guess because i knew shes be great

Re: How involved are your BM's?

LOL Jenn!

Re: How involved are your BM's?

My sister (MOH) is the most involved. My cousin down in MD has offered to help out, but it's not like she's on the Island. ;) Another friend has gone with me to the photographer and another came with me to pick out my gown. I also have a friend/BM up in CT and she's offered numerous times to come down to LI to help out with planning.

Ironically, I have one BM where I will be her MOH for her July 2003 wedding, but our friendship has basically become non-existent. She's the one involved the least (if at all). To be honest, I don't even want her as a BM, but I can't be her MOH in July and not have her in my wedding 2 months later.

Re: How involved are your BM's?

I have to say that my MOH has been awesome. She's been helping me from the beginning. She came to look for bridal gowns with me, which was very helpful and fun. It was nice to be able to have someone else there to experience it with me.
I also had most of my BMS come to see the dress I ended up choosing. As far as choosing the BMS dresses I knew that I had to take into consideration everyones personal taste. I feel I picked out a dress and color that everyone really loves and my MOHs dress is same material and color but a different style. I'm sure as the wedding gets closer there will be other things that I'll need help with.

Re: How involved are your BM's?

I MUST SAY THAT MY MOH IS GREAT!!! SHE IS SO HELPFUL ABOUT EVERYTHING FROM LITTLE QUESTIONS ABOUT PRICES, TO COMING TO THE HALL WITH ME AND GETTING A TOUR, MY FI DIDN'T EVEN COME THE FIRST TIME.. WHEN WE FIRST TRIED DRESSES FOR MY GIRLS I FIRST STARTED CUTTING OUT PICS THEN I HAD HER TRY ON DRESSES WE GOT RID OF A LOT OF DRESSES THAT WAY!!!! BUT WE FINALLY FOUND A BEAUTIFUL BUT SEXY VIVD DRESS THAT WILL LOOK GREAT ON EVERYONE.. I AM SO LUCKY TO HAVE SOMEONE SO CLOSE AND SO HONEST!!! I LOVE HER AND I COULDN'T HAVE BEEN LUCKY ENOUGH TO HAVE A BETTER MOH!

Re: How involved are your BM's?

I wish I had BM's that were involved. My MOH who is my sister is involved when she's in the mood. Which is rarely. When she is she is great help. And she has great ideas. But lets see to pick out dresses no time was a good time. She gets off of work at 5 and after shes to tired and can't go at night. Hmm Sats. she has things to do. Watching tv or napping. I've wanted to kill her. I begged her to come with me to look for my dress. She had a headache. Begged her to come with me to pick out flowers busy stayed home and layed out. The other 3 are very busy 2 have babies and the other is a workaholic like me. Sorry to ramble on and on but this has really been bothering me.

Re: How involved are your BM's?

Not very involved at all. It's mostly me and my mom doing everything...

Maybe I should have put Mom in the BP! LOL!

Re: How involved are your BM's?

MOH went with me when we were looking for BM dresses. I had her try on so many. She was a great sport. Other than that, I haven't asked any of them to help with anything. I know they must be talking to each other & planning things for my shower.

Re: How involved are your BM's?

Not at all...my FMIL has been an total doll!!! She has helped me with everythinf since day one. I prefer to do things myself anyway, I hate imposing on people or depending on others, especially since I know everyone in my bridal party has extremely busy lives.

Re: How involved are your BM's?

I like doing everything on my own too.

I'm taking all 4 of my girls dress shopping next Saturday. I believe my mom and my FH's mom are planning the shower (I've picked up on some vibes )

I brought a couple of the girls with me when I went looking for wedding gowns and brought my MOH for the final decision.

Every month, I send out a newsletter to each girl telling them about things I did, vendors I looked at, what I booked, etc. I also send them pictures of various things from BM dresses to favors. I want them to know everything that's going on. Plus, it's good experience for them when it's their time to get married.

My MOH is getting married 2 months after me, so we have a ton to do!

Re: How involved are your BM's?

One of my bridesmaids lives in Nashville, and one of my bridesmaids is recovering from surgery so right now I just have my Mom and my MOH helping me

But my bridesmaids will help. Shower, Bachelorette Party. Whatever i ask of them