How many of you had wedding checks bounce?

thankfully none! but there were a few VERY close friends who didn't give any gift i don't know what's worse ...

We had a friend tell us they couldn't find our check the day after the wedding. FH made me cancel the check immediatly and issue them a new one (which I did but wanted to give them a week or so to find the check) we were charged $20 to cancel the check. We sent the new check and they found the lost check a week later.

Needless to say, we had to pay the $20 charge and they never even sent a thank you and it was a very nice gift ($$$)

This actually happened when I gave a gift!! I used an old checkbook instead of my current account and the check bounced as a result. The bride meant to be tactful by sending a text message but it was awkard until I figured out why it happened! How embarassing, right!

I immediately sent a card through the mail with the corrected check and an extra $50 to cover the bounce fee.

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Posted by MD835

thankfully none! but there were a few VERY close friends who didn't give any gift i don't know what's worse ...

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Same here

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Posted by Shelleybean11

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Posted by MD835

thankfully none! but there were a few VERY close friends who didn't give any gift i don't know what's worse ...

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Same here

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That's awful!

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Posted by MD835

thankfully none! but there were a few VERY close friends who didn't give any gift i don't know what's worse ...

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Me too. One was a BM who I have been friends w/ for years.

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Posted by LIBride1121

And if you did what did you do about it? Should I just throw the check out or should I call the person?? Not to mention my bank charged me $20 because of this…ugh!

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If you are super angry and want to act on that then You should wait until the end of the month or a Friday when people are most likely to get paid and re-depsosit the check! ha ha ha.
Personally though... if you want to really do the right thing then you should call the person and let them know.. because they will have a charge as well.. and they will definately find out and be embarrsed. Don't throw the check out though.. because you can still deposit the funds. I work for a bank so i know a lot about this. Sometimes people just make mistakes in their bank books or they forget to transfer funds. It's common actually for personal checks to bounce.. especially from a wedding because there are so many more checks you are dealing with. The norm is for the person to cover your bounced ck charge though. Keep in mind that they probably got around a $35 charge also. Theirs should be higher than your charge. It is a touchy subject. I've been through it before.. and I hate to say it but I was on the other end of it. I gave a friend a check for something (can't remember what... not a wedding or a gift though) and it bounced and she called and let me know nicely... I felt AWFUL!!!! I made a mistake and miscalculated and didn't transfer enough money. I paid for her charge and told her when to re-deposit it. She was nice about it and so was I... I doubt she even remembers it now... but I do bc I really felt bad about it!

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Posted by MD835

thankfully none! but there were a few VERY close friends who didn't give any gift i don't know what's worse ...

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I know what's worse!!! Not getting the gift! That's VERY rude! At least the other person tried to give something! I have a feeling there will be some people who won't give a gift. Some people are inconsiderate like that! Remember who they are though... so when the time comes around....

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Posted by skinny237

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Posted by MD835

thankfully none! but there were a few VERY close friends who didn't give any gift i don't know what's worse ...

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Me too. One was a BM who I have been friends w/ for years.

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WOW. seriously?? thats just plain mind blowingly rude.

and i'll tell you whats worse - not giving a gift!!

ugh... i hope I don't get any bounced checks! That would be a pain to deal with. I assume that when that happens, the giver of the useless check also gets charged a fee from the bank. So I would probably just give it a little bit of time, maybe a week or two. And then hopefully THEY would realize it before I'd need to contact them. A part of me would not want to just let it slide though. The people I'm inviting are all my closest friends & family, i just couldn't see any of them doing this on purpose. So I'm sure they'd feel bad and want to fix it (I would if it were ME) So after waiting a little bit, I'd probably shoot them a nice e-mail (WAY too awkward of a phonecall! I wouldn't want either of us to feel like an idiot).

And about the No Gifts at all - that is so sad that anybody would do this. It's understandable if you're a kid (like under 18) then whatever. You don't know. But an adult coming to a wedding and not giving ANYTHING is just plain rude. I have one friend from high school who never gives a gift ever. It's just weird. I think it's because he just doesn't have much. At every one of my birthdays, he just gives me a little card. Obviously, that's okay but still kinda strange. When you go to somebody's party, it's just understandable that you give a gift - even if it's a small one. I'm curious as to if he'll be giving me anything for the wedding. Hmmm... I'll guess I'll just have to wait and see.

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Posted by RockysGirl

ugh... i hope I don't get any bounced checks! That would be a pain to deal with. I assume that when that happens, the giver of the useless check also gets charged a fee from the bank. So I would probably just give it a little bit of time, maybe a week or two. And then hopefully THEY would realize it before I'd need to contact them. A part of me would not want to just let it slide though. The people I'm inviting are all my closest friends & family, i just couldn't see any of them doing this on purpose. So I'm sure they'd feel bad and want to fix it (I would if it were ME) So after waiting a little bit, I'd probably shoot them a nice e-mail (WAY too awkward of a phonecall! I wouldn't want either of us to feel like an idiot).

And about the No Gifts at all - that is so sad that anybody would do this. It's understandable if you're a kid (like under 18) then whatever. You don't know. But an adult coming to a wedding and not giving ANYTHING is just plain rude. I have one friend from high school who never gives a gift ever. It's just weird. I think it's because he just doesn't have much. At every one of my birthdays, he just gives me a little card. Obviously, that's okay but still kinda strange. When you go to somebody's party, it's just understandable that you give a gift - even if it's a small one. I'm curious as to if he'll be giving me anything for the wedding. Hmmm... I'll guess I'll just have to wait and see.

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The latter half of this reminded me of a rude friend i had. He was invited to a wedding... and brought a guest and gave no gift! Now it's one thing to go to the wedding and not give a gift... but to actually bring a guest and still no gift is soooo far beyond rude. some people just don't know any better.. or even worse they don't care! It's one thing if they can't give much bc of money situations or whatever... but to actually bring a guest and still not give anything?!?!?!?!?!! I'm almost embarrased that this is a friend of mine!

I wonder if the BM in question didn't give a gift because she assumed that between the money they spent on their dress, If they paid for the shower, etc...was their gift?

Dunno. I find it odd, but maybe thats why?

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Posted by Shelleybean11

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Posted by MD835

thankfully none! but there were a few VERY close friends who didn't give any gift i don't know what's worse ...

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Same here

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Technically they have 1-year to give a gift...maybe the gift is still on its way?

Thank you all for your advice. My bank said that I should bring the check to the persons bank and try to cash it there. If there is still no money in the account, they obviously can’t cash it. If I try to redeposit it in my account and it bounces again, I will be charged another $2o. I think I am just going to forget about it. If the person realizes and wants to make it up to me, then that’s cool, but if not, I’m not going to hold it against them. We are good friends and I don’t want to ruin that over a silly wedding gift.

On the no gifts thing, we had four grown adults show up to the wedding and not bring gifts. No cards…nothing. The best part is that they are my husbands family. All 4 of them. I understand if you don’t have the money to attend a wedding, but at least give your freaking cousin a card congratulating them…how rude!!