how'd you do with $$ wedding gifts?.....

JennyAl Posted: Mar 05, 2006 03:47 AM

how'd you do with $$ wedding gifts?.....

hi ladies...this question is for the already married brides......

without sounding tacky....

how much money in gifts did you get back from the wedding from the money you spent on it?....

my FH was asking his friends and they said they got back more than what they spent......and asked me to post this question on LIW...i wasnt sure how to search for this question....we've been saving $$ over our 2 yr long engagement...and by the time we have our wedding, we woulda spent a lil more than 1/2 of it on our wedding....i'd hope to make it most back so we can use it for a dwnpymt...

TIA!!!

Mrs. dleeny Posted: Mar 05, 2006 10:02 AM

Re: how'd you do with $$ wedding gifts?.....

you have to look at it this way, having a wedding is not an 'investment'. it's the biggest party you'll ever throw and all your guests are there to share in your joy and the best day you will probably ever have.

sarahthegreat Posted: Mar 05, 2006 10:17 AM

Re: how'd you do with $$ wedding gifts?.....

i'm not married yet, but i'm going into this with an open mind....its hard to ask a question like this on here..for obvious reasons....but i would not plan on having enough for a down payment.

bride2b24 Posted: Mar 05, 2006 10:19 AM

Re: how'd you do with $$ wedding gifts?.....

Posted by dleeny

you have to look at it this way, having a wedding is not an 'investment'. it's the biggest party you'll ever throw and all your guests are there to share in your joy and the best day you will probably ever have.

i agree......although that one person was out of line! eew!!! lol.....anyways of course everyone would like to make their money back .....but it def doesnt always happen.....i wouldnt go into it thinking that way just enjoy yourself and dont go above and beyond your own means planning! good luck!

babybug631 Posted: Mar 05, 2006 10:24 AM

Re: how'd you do with $$ wedding gifts?.....

I lost money and DH's side of the family was VERY generous. I really don't know how anyone can break even. You must get REALLY good gifts.

csorisi Posted: Mar 05, 2006 10:37 AM

Re: how'd you do with $$ wedding gifts?.....

We basically broke even. Each of our parents contributed money to the wedding and they gave us gifts too. We ended up getting what we paid for the wedding, maybe a little more. It really depends on your guests though. Had we done things differently though we would have come away with more money then we spend. We ended up having a band (something DH had to have) and we spent more on our photographer then we originally wanted. We also had a brunch for our guests at the hotel the next morning & provided shuttle service. Our guest were VERY generous--we were shocked when we opened some of our cards. It really depends--but like the other poster said you are throwing this party & you can't expect to 'make' any of the money back.

prncssrachel Posted: Mar 05, 2006 10:46 AM

Re: how'd you do with $$ wedding gifts?.....

I don't really know how you can say you lost money. We did not have a wedding to 'make money'. If it was the money we wanted, we would not have had the party. Just assume you'll get nothing but the love and adoration of your family and friends and be grateful for anythign above and beyond that you receive.

JennyAl Posted: Mar 05, 2006 11:04 AM

Re: how'd you do with $$ wedding gifts?.....

i didnt mean to offend anyone one....i know this isnt an investment or that i shouldnt me looking at this if we lost $$...made a profit....etc......

i was just curious.....

my mom keeps thinking it as '$$ you're kissing goodbye...' and trust me that annoys me!! i know this is a celebration that you just can't put a price on it...

TIA.....

Mrs. dleeny Posted: Mar 05, 2006 11:30 AM

Re: how'd you do with $$ wedding gifts?.....

Posted by JennyAl

my mom keeps thinking it as '$$ you're kissing goodbye...' and trust me that annoys me!! i know this is a celebration that you just can't put a price on it...

TIA.....

your mom is looking at it as an investment.

a wedding is a celebration of love, not a day on Wall Street gifts are icing on the cake... IMO

the only possible way I can see any couple 'making money' on a wedding is if their parents foot the bill (or most of it anyway).

ETA: lets say for arguments sake that you pay $100 pp at your hall (including the tax and 18% gratuity). each couple would have to give you $200 just to break even on the cost of the hall only. what about the invitations, your dress, your florist, your photographer, video, DOC (if you have one), DJ/band, wedding rings, HM, Officiant, BP gifts, OOT bags, DIY projects, etc etc. all that other stuff needs to factored in to the cost as well.

ML110 Posted: Mar 05, 2006 11:39 AM

Re: how'd you do with $$ wedding gifts?.....

i totally agree with the other girls... you shouldn't even think about what gifts you'll get or won't get..... its just a nice day to celebrate with friends and family....it shouldn't be a
fund raiser' for a house downpayment. too many people plan weddings they can't afford and expect to 'make it back' in gifts, and it just doesn't happen.... we had a couple families of 6 people that came to the wedding, and we got $100 in the cards from them... definitely not enough to 'cover' the cost of having all 6 people there- BUT it was something to put towards our new bedroom set, so i was more than happy.....
sorry to offend you, but if you wanted enough money for a down payment, you wouldn't have had the big wedding.....

jaclyncalderon Posted: Mar 05, 2006 11:43 AM

Re: how'd you do with $$ wedding gifts?.....

I'm thinking you're not going to come out ahead unless you didn't pay for your wedding at -

JandJ1224 Posted: Mar 05, 2006 12:29 PM

Re: how'd you do with $$ wedding gifts?.....

I don't think its that crazy of a question. I can't see how someone wouldn't be excited to look through their cards and see how much they got. I know I will be happy with whatever gifts we get. We will have a great night with the people that we love.

Jan05Bride Posted: Mar 05, 2006 12:33 PM

Re: how'd you do with $$ wedding gifts?.....

Posted by jaclyncalderon

I'm thinking you're not going to come out ahead unless you didn't pay for your wedding at -

Yes you can. DH & I paid for 100% of our wedding expenses and we received gifts in excess of what it cost. We did a lot of research and spend a lot of money on some things and got great deals on others, while foregoing some nonneccessities. I had very generous gifts from both sides of the family also.

JPC1125 Posted: Mar 05, 2006 12:33 PM

Re: how'd you do with $$ wedding gifts?.....

we were hoping to at least break even however many of our guests were right out of college or from upstate and thought that 100 for a couple was sufficient so we ended up losing money on couples who were not aware of how much a LI wedding costs

lrs2005 Posted: Mar 05, 2006 12:52 PM

Re: how'd you do with $$ wedding gifts?.....

We received gifts in excess of the cost of the food, but not in excess of the cost of the food, music, flowers, invites, clothing, honeymoon.

kmkelly Posted: Mar 05, 2006 01:01 PM

Re: how'd you do with $$ wedding gifts?.....

I don't think it's an unreasonable question -- you have to think about where you'll be financially afterwards. I think at least if you get a good chunk of it back you're in good shape -- and you had your wedding day which is priceless.

christy Posted: Mar 05, 2006 01:10 PM

Re: how'd you do with $$ wedding gifts?.....

We got back less than half of what we spent, which is what I expected anyway. I didn't even care! I would still spend all the money I did on my wedding if I had to do all over again. We had enough in gifts to put down on our condo, so all was good.

PaddysGirl15 Posted: Mar 05, 2006 02:11 PM

Re: how'd you do with $$ wedding gifts?.....

I dont think it is an unreasonble question at all. Many brides I have spoken with have told me with the amount of money they spent on their wedding they could have put a down payment on a house.

Yes your wedding day is one of the most special days or your life but I think its a natural assumption for all of us to plan for what happens after the wedding- eg the rest of your life!

JazzyT Posted: Mar 05, 2006 02:18 PM

Re: how'd you do with $$ wedding gifts?.....

I am not married yet, but I am not expecting to make all of my money back...so basically I want people to come and enjoy my big day and what i get I get.

SomethingBlu Posted: Mar 05, 2006 02:28 PM

Re: how'd you do with $$ wedding gifts?.....

Posted by prncssrachel

I don't really know how you can say you lost money. We did not have a wedding to 'make money'. If it was the money we wanted, we would not have had the party. Just assume you'll get nothing but the love and adoration of your family and friends and be grateful for anythign above and beyond that you receive.

I agree with Rach 100% this was our mindset going in. We paid for EVERYTHING and received slightly less than half of the catering hall's costs in gifts. This was about 1/6th of our total budget. But even still, we felt blessed to get anything.

There are posts like this on Newlyweds and some oldies here...if you're willing to patiently search.